“Don’t.” Sam’s mouth hovered over his. “I can’t listen to you say you thought I didn’t want you anymore when that’s the furthest thing from the truth.”
Words unsaid hung in the air, waiting to be spoken, yet Sam stayed quiet. The painful silence resonated through the apartment, and Zach waited, hopeful his instincts hadn’t proved him wrong.
“Andy is gone. I told him there was nothing left between us. That I wanted you.” His lips brushed Zach’s. “That I loved you.”
Finally—the words that created magic from the madness of it all.
“I didn’t know.”
“I’m sorry for that.” Sam took him by the hand and led him to the sofa where they both sat, Sam pressed up next to him. “I shouldn’t have held myself back, but I’m not good at this.”
Zach smiled at Sam’s frustration. “This? What, saying I love you, or kissing me? Because you have the kissing thing down pat, so there’s no complaint there.”
But Sam didn’t smile back. “I want to make this right because I know how much the words mean to you, and I don’t want to fu—screw it up.”
With each word, Zach’s heart squeezed a bit tighter. It wasn’t possible to love Sam more than he did at this moment; the absolute honesty and his tentative voice slayed Zach to his core.
“I never thought I’d get a chance at love. I hid away. Not even my friends could bully me or talk me into changing.”
“That bastard did a number on you,” said Sam, running a hand down Zach’s arm.
Hot ribbons of need ran across Zach’s skin, his body awakened from its long dormancy, blooming back to life. “But you’ve changed all that and given me back trust. Trust not only in you that you wouldn’t hurt me, but trust in myself as a man.”
Sam gripped his shoulder, and Zach stared into his unsmiling face.
“What?”
For all outward appearances, Sam presented a tough, hardened ex-cop; always watchful and in control. That wasn’t the man in front of Zach now. The harsh grooves in his forehead smoothed, and Sam’s vulnerability was on full display for the first time for Zach to see. The tightness in his chest returned, along with a welling up of love from a place so deep inside him, Zach hadn’t ever delved that far down before.
“Tell me. You haven’t said it yet, and you’re not the only one who needs this. I need to hear it as much as you do.”
Zach slid his palm up Sam’s chest to rest above his heart. “I love you. I know life isn’t a movie, and that we aren’t promised happy endings all the time. But we have a chance now, out of the craziest of circumstances to create something together, and I want to grab hold and keep it close.”
“You love me.” Sam covered his hand with his own.
“I do. And you love me.”
A smile broke across Sam’s face. “I do. I love you. I gave up on trusting life to behave the way I wanted it to, so I did nothing. From the moment you burst into my life that night in Atlantic City, I had zero control.”
It was as if they’d made private vows to each other; words didn’t need to be spoken aloud. “You make me lose control too.” Zach had never felt so reckless or as free.
Sam’s mouth found his, and it was soft and hot, his lips sweetly tender. The tip of his tongue traced the seam of Zach’s lips, and instinctively Zach opened, allowing it entrance. The hot wet velvet of Sam’s tongue swept inside Zach’s mouth, probing deep, and Zach, the persistent ache inside his chest swelling to pounding desire, slanted his mouth against Sam’s, drinking him down. The hard ridge of Sam’s erection pressed against Zach’s thigh; in a sinuous motion Zach twisted so he rubbed against it, while never breaking contact with Sam’s lips.
The pleasure built, and they stayed on the sofa kissing, Zach continuing to slide against Sam’s cock until Sam broke away, panting slightly, his mouth wet and glinting. “Let’s move this to the bed. I can’t do what I want to do to you out here.”
Zach could barely stand for the trembling of his legs; he needed to lean on Sam to hold him steady. They stumbled to the bedroom, kissing and shedding their clothes as they went, leaving a trail behind them. By the time they reached the bedroom they were panting, naked, and the hunger to feel Sam inside him was almost unbearable.
“Hurry.” He clutched Sam’s arm and pulled his head down for another searching kiss. His cock, stiff and aching, slid along the equally hard length of Sam’s erection, and Zach whimpered from the exquisite torture of the pleasure-pain of his desire.
To his surprise, Sam didn’t rush to push him on the bed. Instead, Sam continued to kiss him; long, languorous kisses that left Zach breathless and shaking. Hunger pooled in his belly, and he clung tighter to Sam, wanting to meld their bodies together until it would be impossible to separate them.
Sam lifted him up and placed him on the bed, then straddled his hips, his face still an unreadable mask. Zach lay still, body aching, his heart pounding like the ocean waves crashing against the rocks.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I’m looking at you lying there, so fucking perfect, thinking one day you’ll wake up and wonder why you made the mistake of getting involved with a washed-up ex-cop like me.”
Through half-opened blinds, gleaming bands of moonlight striped the room. The pale light shifted, throwing Sam’s solemn face into stark relief.
