The complaining surprised Carter, and he found himself for the first time getting not so much annoyed with Jacks but frustrated at his unwillingness to be friendly to Reed. Jacks didn’t seem to even want to give Reed a chance. Right from the start he wanted him gone. And from the sad expression in Reed’s eyes, he saw it as well.
But Carter wasn’t about to give in to a sulky ten-year-old. “Because I want you two to get to know each other better. Reed is going to be around a lot more, and I hope you can be friends.”
Carter had never thought to explain his sexuality to Jacks. Up to now it hadn’t been necessary or important; working on Jacks’s socialization skills and getting him to feel safe remained paramount. Perhaps, Carter thought as he hung his and Reed’s jackets on the newel post of the winding wooden bannister that led to the second floor, it was time to introduce, carefully of course, the idea of Reed as his partner. He couldn’t even begin to think about sleeping arrangements or Reed staying the night. Carter groaned at all the obstacles, yet recalling their time last night and this morning, giving Reed up was no longer an option.
They walked into the living room, and Carter flopped down on the sofa while Reed remained standing. Carter pointed to the club chair, but Reed gave an almost indiscernible shake of his head. Frowning, Carter made room for Jacks, who scrambled up next to him.
“Why is he gonna be over more?” Jacks’s prodding cemented Carter’s decision to tell him the whole truth. Jacks was going to be eleven, and Carter had no concerns he wouldn’t understand.
“I gotta pee first.” Jacks raced out of the room, and Carter ran his hands through his hair in frustration.
“I’m sorry.” He held out his hand. “He’ll get used to you, don’t worry. It’ll just take some time. Come sit next to me for support, please.”
To his surprise, Reed shook his head. “I’m thinking maybe I shouldn’t be here and you need to do this alone. I’m too much of a distraction for him, and it’s making me nervous as well.”
Fuck. This wasn’t how he’d thought it would be. He got up from the sofa and walked over to Reed who looked as though he was ready to bolt. “Please stay.” He took Reed into his arms. At first Reed stiffened and tried to pull away, but Carter wouldn’t let go. This was his home, and if he wanted to hug Reed, he would. He held on until Reed relented and returned the hug. “I need you with me to do this.”
“What if he hates me?” Reed pulled back and chewed at his lip. “He might think I’m taking you away from him.”
“He might,” said Carter, admitting Reed’s concern was totally valid. “But all the more reason for you to stay and show him that isn’t the case. That he’s not losing me but gaining you.”
“Why are you hugging him?”
They sprang apart at Jacks’s question, and even Carter needed a moment to catch his breath and wait for his heart to stop pounding. Jacks stood at the entranceway, his eyes wide, a frown tugging his lips downward.
“Come sit next to me.” Carter sat on the sofa and patted the space next to him. “We can talk.”
Shooting suspicious looks at Reed, who’d retreated to a club chair opposite the sofa, Jacks sat next to him. “Talk about what? I want a snack.”
“Wait until we finish talking ’cause this is important. Reed is a friend of mine, a very good friend.”
“Like me and Henry and David?” Jacks scuffed his sneakered toe on the wooden floor.
“Sort of, but more.” Carter’s heart began to pound, and he searched for Reed, who gave him a brief nod and an encouraging smile. “You know how Henry’s mom and dad love each other and are married?”
“Yeah, so?”
“Sometimes two men or two women fall in love like that.”
Jacks’s foot stopped swinging. His eyes widened, and his mouth made a perfect O. “Like boyfriend and girlfriend? You and him are boyfriends?”
The dryness in his mouth prevented him from speaking at first. He pulled at his shirt collar, which suddenly felt two sizes too small, and finally managed to answer. “Yeah, we are. How do you feel about it?”
It might have been his imagination or a trick of the light, but Carter swore he saw something flicker in Jacks’s eyes before he shrugged. “I’m hungry.” Without another word to either of them, he ran from the room and within moments Carter heard the refrigerator door open.
He faced Reed. “Well, that went pretty easy, don’t you think?”
To Carter’s surprise, Reed stood and instead of joining him on the sofa, went to the hallway and picked up his jacket from the bannister. “I think you’re fooling yourself if you believe Jacks is okay with this. Before we jump into this relationship, you need to take a step back.” He slipped on the jacket, then picked up his overnight bag. “Call me after you talk to him without me around and find out how he really feels.”
Before he could open his mouth to answer, Reed walked out the front door, leaving him standing all alone, wondering what the hell just happened.
Chapter Seventeen
‡
“To what doI owe this dinner invitation? Aren’t you working tonight?”
Reed and his father sat at a table, away from the noise of the bar area. He’d brought them out a plate of sliders and fries, along with a green salad for a pretense of healthy eating. His father took a healthy swallow of his beer, but Reed sipped on plain ice water. With his thoughts jumbled more than ever, and more anxious than even during finals, the last thing he needed was his mind clouded with alcohol.
