Ash dressed casually in a stark white linen shirt, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and crisp black pants. Last night, lying in each other’s arms after making love, Drew had remarked upon his hair, which he’d grown longer.“It feels like silk. Gives me something to hold on to when you’re inside me.”
He’d grow it to his waist if that’s what Drew liked. A flash of green caught his eye, and he watched as Drew strolled out of the bedroom looking deliciously handsome in his pale green linen shirt and khaki pants. Ash’s gaze raked hungrily over his lover’s perfect face, slim hips, and the pale wedge of skin that showed at his neck where his shirt lay unbuttoned. He licked his lips, remembering how sweet all that skin tasted.
“Hi, baby.” He pulled Drew against him, then bent down to capture his mouth in a bruising kiss. Drew’s lips opened to his questing tongue, and as usual, Ash lost himself in the miraculous feel of their mingled breaths and slick tongues. Kissing Drew, Ash discovered, was an addicting drug.
“Uh, excuse us, you guys, but can you hold it off until later?” A familiar voice broke into Ash’s befuddled mind, but he didn’t care and continued to place soft kisses on Drew’s lips. Only the sound of a throat clearing and a muttered curse caused him to break contact with Drew’s hot mouth to slant a look to the side.
He caught Keith’s amused smirk, but his stomach clenched at the grimace of disgust on Jordan’s face. With one final kiss, Ash pulled away from Drew but kept his arm draped over Drew’s shoulder, his body tucked into Ash’s side.
“Hello, you two.” He extended a hand first to Keith, who took it, giving him a strong clasp and a squeeze. As Keith shook Drew’s hand, Ash offered his hand to Jordan, who stared hard at him for a moment, then deliberately turned his back on him to walk over to the bar and pour himself a drink. Ash’s face flamed at the purposeful insult, but he said nothing. This was Drew’s night, and he wasn’t about to ruin it for him.
“He’ll come around. Don’t worry.” Rachel spoke into his ear and squeezed his arm as Drew followed after Keith and Jordan.
“Thanks. I don’t care if he doesn’t like me, but it hurts Drew, and I can’t stand to see that happen.” Ash leaned down to give her a kiss hello and clap Mike on the back.
Mike gave him a curious look. “You and D are really, um, together? Like a couple?”
Ash braced himself for more criticism from another of Drew’s friends. “Yes. I hope it won’t be as much of a problem for you as it is for Jordan.”
Mike shrugged. “I don’t care. As long as you’re good to him, it doesn’t matter to me. Jordan’s always been overprotective of Drew and me, maybe because he’s the oldest of our group. I don’t know.” He glanced over at Rachel. “D and I worked out our difficulties, and I’m sure you will with Jordan as well.” He and Rachel excused themselves to get a drink as Esther approached.
“Asher, darling boy. Come give me a kiss.”
A genuine smile broke across his face. Esther was hands down his favorite person in the world. He trusted her and valued her opinions and honesty.
“Hello, Esther. You’re looking lovely as usual.” He kissed her cheek and then her slim fingers. Tucking her little hand into the crook of his arm, he walked her across the room, over to where Drew stood, still talking to Jordan and Keith.
“I love walking arm in arm with a big, strong man. My Sy was like you, and he always made me feel so safe.” She patted his arm.
“I’m honored you compare me to your late husband in any way. Drew tells me he was a wonderful man.”
She nodded and squeezed his arm. “He was, yes. And you have been wonderful for Drew and those young children at the clinic.” She halted their procession and faced him, placing her hand on his arm.
He tensed as her gaze fell to his bared arm. Her face blanched, and he knew she’d seen and felt the many scars that twisted over his exposed skin. He’d forgotten about them and never rolled down his shirtsleeves before everyone started to arrive for the party. Now Esther had a full view of his humiliation and self-destruction.
“My dearest child.” Her lips trembled, and he noticed how white she’d become. Fearing for her health, he led her quickly to a chair and sat next to her. “Why?”
He could never tell her. It was enough he lived with the memories, but a woman like Esther didn’t deserve the burden of his self-destructive behavior.
“It was long ago, before I came to New York, before I managed to make something of my life.” He released a breath he wasn’t aware of holding. “I’ve done many things I’m ashamed of and wish I could erase. My life was barren and meaningless, and I treated people like they were nothing, nobodies like me. Having Drew as a friend and you, Esther, as someone who cares for me has irrevocably changed me.”
He’d never known what it meant to belong, to have someone else worry or care about him, nor had he ever thought of anyone else’s feelings but his own. Being with Drew and working at the clinic had showed him his life could have purpose and that he meant something, not only to those kids he tried to help, but to Drew and Esther. He’d never thought it possible to dream of a life full of happiness, yet every day that he woke up with Drew, the dream became a reality.
Tears brimmed in her eyes. “I love you, Asher. You’ve become as dear and special to me as if you were my own. Promise me you’ll never do anything to harm yourself again.”
“I’m not good. I’m selfish, arrogant, and quick-tempered. I don’t know what you see in me.” He grabbed both her hands in his. “But I don’t have that driving need to hurt myself anymore. I think I’m beginning to believe maybe I am not fully to blame for the past. I’m learning to find my happiness, which before was nothing more than an impossible dream.” And as he spoke, he realized it was the first time he’d ever said it. But it was true. He was happy, and as his gaze slid over the people in the room and found Drew, warmth suffused his body and the tension within him melted away. With the sixth sense they seemed to have when the other was around, Drew caught his eye and winked. A smile crept across Ash’s face.
“Does my grandson know?”
“Know what, Esther?” His concentration remained on Drew.
“That you love him. And from the looks he’s giving you, I’d say the feeling is mutual.”
Ash’s heart dropped to his stomach. All the saliva in his throat dried up, and he tasted sawdust in his mouth. “Um, I—”
“Is this the dashing, silver-tongued lawyer I’ve heard so much about?” Esther’s voice, full of amusement, had him staring at her in astonishment.
“Esther.” Ash sighed. “I don’t know what to say to you.”
