My grandfather turned his face from mine, staring out of the window. When he turned back, he nodded. “Elio Ascari.”
“What about him?” My mouth was too fast for my mind. “Oh. He wants to marry me?”
“It would be an arrangement. As far as families go, his has a long history here in Italy.”
“Racers?”
“Among other successful people. His mamma is a famous singer, for starters.”
“Details,” I said. “I want them clear beforehand.”
He nodded.
I went down my mental checklist, speaking the terms out loud. No love. That wasn’t what this was about. I wanted the world to know that this was an arrangement between two families. Nothing more. Nothing less. I wanted it to sound cold. Impersonal. Exactly what it was. Like royal marriages back in the day.
“This will not be a problem,”nonnosaid. “He is eager for this.”
“If it is—deal’s off.”
“He will not be convinced that you will not fall in love with him. He will always try to persuade you.”
“Until he knows he has no chance.”
“Your love is worth fighting for.”
“The sooner he learns there is no fight, the better.”
“I will mention it.” He opened and closed his hands. “If he is too persistent—I will handle it personally.”
“Lovers,” I said. “He can have as many as he’d like. The more, the better.”
“Rocco will handle the smaller details.”
“That’s always where the devil is,” I said.
“Saverio has until the end of the week. Say what you must say to him, Mia.” He sighed. “Even though I respect your feelings, he is a respected young man in this family. He has done much for us. He is loyal. He deserves to hear what needs to be said from you. He deserves a proper ending.”
I stood, and so did he. I couldn’t contain the pain in my chest a second longer. I had to get out of his office. He hugged me and I almost broke down in his arms. I rushed out of them, shutting the door with a softclickbehind me.
Rubbing my stinging eyes, I ran into a chest, not seeing him. His arms automatically went around me, and I lost the battle with my heart.
Sobs tore through me. The sharpness of them felt like knife wounds that would never heal.
“Mia,”zioRocco said. He pulled us down the hallway, further away fromnonno’s office. “Mia? What has happened, bella mia?”
I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t even find the energy to look up at him.
He lifted my chin, forcing my watery eyes to look into his. Tears poured out, almost drowning me. I’d never cried this hard in my entire life. My heart rebelled against my chest.
“Tell me, bella mia.”
If anyone could understand, it waszioRocco. Mypadrino.Godfather. He had agreed to an arranged marriage for the good of the family. I thought of the contrast between his marriage and my parents’.
Freezing cold and warm.
I’d never feel that warmth in mine. I couldn’t. Because the frigid dread of something happening to Saverio overruled the coldness that would be my marriage.
“What have you done,” he whispered.
