“I still have my bag,” I said, tugging on the straps in demonstration, and veered a bit away from him to take in the monastery.
The crude road high above the sea faded into white-washed stone. All the pines and olive trees and vegetation that I had no name for opened to a pale gold structure with an oval door. The monastery itself didn’t look all that old from the outside, but inside, it seemed almost ancient.
My fingers trailed over the different textures—rock, stone, metals, and fabric tapestries—and my eyes took in the numerous religious pictures that lined the walls. Before we came, Capo had given me the freedom to choose where we went first. After talking to the camera guy, I’d decided on coming here. It wasn’t that far, I wanted to walk and get dirty, as Capo had said, and I’d never been to a monastery before. A dip in the water after we were done would make for a nice date.
We were both quiet as Ilooked around.I, notwe. I took in every crevice and inch, stopping to read about the history of the place—no one really knew when the monastery had been founded, but the first evidence was in 1892—while Capo looked at me.
It was a look that I hadn’t really seen on his face before. Maybe he was silently reminiscing, or maybe he was trying to figure something out. I wasn’t sure, but when we exited andcame out on the other side, a nice patio with a balcony open to the sky and sea, I breathed easier, even though it had been peaceful inside.
He was a hard man to understand, in terms of feelings, and I was hoping forever would help me learn more about his expressions and what they meant. As far as I could tell, though, he rarely showed any emotion to the outside world. I didn’t think that would ever change—he was too hardened—but afterNonno…somethinghad changed. It had to do with me. We hadn’t known each other for long, or been married more than a month, but I felt it. He was more open with me, but even so, not nearly enough.
Maybe I needed to be more open with him, too.
The moment he took his eyes off me to stare out, his eyes reflecting the water below, I felt it and stared at him. I lifted the camera and pressed it against my eye, hoping the photo would be able to capture him—the intensity that seemed to come natural to him, but also that same inward look that gave me no clues to his feelings. I set the camera down and then pulled out my phone, snapping another one.
He looked at me and made a face. I caught that one on my phone, too.
“What?” I said, grinning down at it, but talking to him. “You bought me the camera—andthe phone. I’m going to use both to capture this entire experience.”
“The scenery,” he said.
“That’s not the only experience,” I said, then looked him in the eye. “You. You’re an experience, too.”
The words slipped out, and in the moment, I really didn’t care that they had. A rush of something like the sea had rushed up and brought the words to the surface of my mouth. But as soon as I said it, I turned my eyes down again, setting the phone back in my backpack, not able to hold his stare.
I felt him moving closer to me, but I didn’t move, fiddling with the front pocket zipper. His pointer finger came underneath my chin and lifted it, forcing me to either look at him or anywhere else. If I looked away, he’d think I was chickening out—life included so much more than adventure, didn’t it? Because at that moment, staring into his eyes as the sun started to soften the world around us, he seemed like the biggest adventure I’d ever have.
Being with him felt like touching life. Having it my hands.Mine.
“The butterfly and the wolf.” He grinned. “You belong to me.”
A shiver made me tremble, and goosebumps rose on my arms. The wind hadn’t moved, and the temperature hadn’t lowered. It was the power in his voice, and I didn’t have to guess at the meaning behind the words. The threat was as clear as the waves below us. Belonging to him wasn’t a simple matter. It meant that he’d do damage to anyone who tried to hurt me. He’d proven that.
“You’re still thinking about what I said earlier,” I whispered. “About my bag?”
He nodded. “I’ll never forget it. Someone harms you. They harm me.”
I sighed and took his hand, holding it while I turned toward the sea. Something inside of me was changing, and even though my heart rushed with warm blood at his words, it hurt, too. It hurt because I wasn’t used to trusting anyone, but without realizing it, there was trust between us.
My throat felt tight, and I shook my head, trying to dislodge the pressure. Capo held my hand tighter and led me back toward the trail. As we got closer to the path to the beach, I decided to take a picture of the scene before we were in it. Numerous bright colored umbrellas were stuck in the sand, towels laid out underneath some of them, and rocks and boulders almost fencedthem in, followed by the front-facing sea. It even had a small building for refreshments.
I snapped a few pictures, trying to be all artsy, but as I was going through them, I stopped. Narrowing my eyes, I tried to bring the details into better focus. Then I realized…I could zoom in. I moved the camera away from my face, then brought it closer, to be sure what I saw waswhatI saw.
Fucka me, it was.
My reaction had gotten Capo’s attention.
“Caught a shark?”
“Not…exactly.”
Lifting the camera a little, I turned it so he could see the screen.
“Nude beach,” he said.
He said it so casually, but the image of the naked guy on my camera made me wrinkle my nose.Hewas a bit wrinkled,allover. Too bad the sun wasn’t like an iron and helped him out some. I deleted it.
“To each their own, but wouldn’t that be a little risky?” I said. “I mean, it’s—” I motioned to his crotch “—like dangling fish bait?”
