The next time she had a quiet moment with Nick, she would suggest they try being friends with benefits.
However, before that, she had a few other tasks she’d been putting off for a while.It was time to tackle them.
The first item on her agenda today was donating Arthur’s clothes to charity.
She’d been looking to the universe for some sort of sign that it was okay to let Arthur go, that the timing was perfect for her to start her new life.
Unfortunately, as she knew all too well, the universe didn’t always provide those signals, and if she waited for the perfect timing, she’d be waiting forever.
Besides, she didn’t want her memories to intrude on her time with Nick.
Nick.
Just hearing his name on the job site caused a reaction in her.Every time someone called out to him, her ears pricked up.She’d gone from blushing around him to practically drooling.
When he wasn’t around, she missed him.On days when he couldn’t linger after work, she yearned for his touch.In sleeping with him, she’d hoped to get him out of her system, but he’d only implanted himself under her skin like a microchip.
That microchip had been pinging nonstop.
She’d tried to tell herself it was just about sex, but she was starting to wonder if she’d miscalculated somewhere along the way.If their only connection was sex, then why did she long to see his smile?If it was only about the physical attraction, then why did she love talking to him so much?
There was a chance that her emotions had become engaged somehow.
One thing was clear.She wouldn’t be able to sort out her feelings for Nick unless she let Arthur go.
She needed to make a new start.Today was as good a day as any.
“I can do this.”
She showered and dressed, throwing her hair up into a ponytail.After grabbing a few garbage bags from her utility drawer, she headed back upstairs.Without giving herself any time to dwell on memories, she removed all Arthur’s shirts from the closet and placed them in one of the bags.Although the temptation to hold them to her nose and breathe in deeply was strong, she resisted.After all, she’d tried holding on to his scent for a long time, but it had faded ages ago.
They were just garments now, no longer a part of him.They would find a new life, helping someone in need.
She tied off the bag with a double knot.Before she could change her mind, she brought the bag downstairs and outside, packing it in the trunk of her car.
“There,” she said, heading back into the house.“One bag down.You’re doing a great job.”
Trembling with resolve, she went back to her bedroom.She started a different bag, one destined for the garbage.In this one, she placed Arthur’s underwear, socks and some half-used toiletries that she’d never quite managed to clear out of the bathroom.Once again, she tied off the bag, brought it downstairs and put it in the garage.
She kept up her pep talks as she worked, giving voice to her thoughts to spur herself on.“Look at you.You’re a queen of organization.You should be proud of yourself.”
She should probably have taken Mia up on her offer of help years ago.Her sister had tried several times to persuade Claire to let the items go, but Claire hadn’t been ready.Mia would be proud.
Nick would be proud.
It hardly mattered.She was doing this for herself, first and foremost.
The tension headache that had plagued her the last few days reappeared, pounding on the tender flesh at her temples.
Ignoring it, at least for the time being, Claire carried on with her task.Before she knew it, she’d bundled up all of Arthur’s clothes.The only item she kept was a rugby shirt, his favorite.Folding that carefully, she placed it at the back of one of her drawers.
She would allow herself that one memento.
Her plan today was three-pronged, and she knew each step would be a bit harder than the one before.Still, she continued.
Step two involved removing some of Arthur’s photos from around the house.It wasn’t that she wanted to erase every trace of him.She just needed to let him go, and she wouldn’t be able to do that if she continued to carry on conversations with his photos.
Beginning in the living room, Claire began to remove some of the pictures.There was an empty shelf in the closet in the spare bedroom, the perfect place to store them.She kept one on the wall, the photo of them dancing at their wedding, but she relegated the others to the upstairs shelf.
