I glance at the cabin. How am I supposed to promise without knowing what she wants? It isn’t his choice to make.
“I promise,” I say weakly. “As much as I can when we’re sharing a cabin.”
“Watch it.”
“I’m serious,” I say. “I’ll try.”
“If you really care about her, you know it’s for the best. You know how you are in relationships. Neither of us wants her to get hurt.”
“Oh, I know.” I chuckle. “Or maybe I don’t. When’s the last time I had one of those?”
“Exactly. If you’re lonely, I can always set you up on another date.”
The idea of touching someone else makes my stomach roll. “No, no. Not lonely. You’re right. I don’t have time for that. Just needed someone to talk me down. Thanks, man.”
“I’m trusting you. She already told me about her crush on you, and that was weeks ago. I don’t know how far things have gotten.”
Weeks ago. Evie had feelings for me weeks ago. “She did?” My voice breaks. “Before we left?”
“Yeah. Well, sort of, in a way. The point is, I need you to be the one to stop anything from going too far. She has a big heart…”
“I get it, and I will.”
Eviedoeshave a big heart—too big for me. Too good for me. When I end the call with Everett, I don’t feel bitter. He’s right. I’ll be the one to hold the boundaries, even though I’ve been feeling them wanting to fall and shatter.
It has to be me.
EVIE
The walk home helped. I shook off the embarrassment of the fall and collected my thoughts. All the way home, I repeated the reality like an affirmation. Nothing is happening between Theo and me. That’s what we agreed to.
Theo comes home later than usual, giving me plenty of time to wallow in my misery.
My hands are still scraped, but it’s not so bad anymore. The bleeding has stopped, and any pain subsides into a dull throb. I finish my work for the day, even with my bandaged hands, and I hate the feeling that comes after.
It’s like I’m waiting for him to come home.
A thrill comes next. Nothing is happening, but he still wants me. He wants to kiss me. I could feel it. I was the one who had to stop him, even though my coworkers were around. Anyone could have seen us.
I want to kiss him, too. It’s the first time in days I let myself think about it. He’s all I want. The thrill is still there when he finally opens the front door.
I perk up, turning to face him from my spot on the couch—one that’s practically permanent by now. I’m used to staying in this little cabin with him, even if the proximity is strange.
“Guess what?” I fight off a smile.
“What?” He shucks off his shoes and outer layers.
“I found part two of the documentary we were watching. What do you say? Should we start it up?”
He’s the one who wanted to watch the documentary about a paper company, not me. I expect it to be an obvious answer. It’s a good way to spend the evening, like we usually do. We can go back to our routine.
Theo sits on the rocking chair, which creaks and groans beneath him. I miss when he sat on the couch with me. He’s been distant for days, and it’s clear we aren’t returning to normal yet, not even after our almost-kiss in the woods. Maybe thisisour new normal.
The thrill subsides back into embarrassment and pain.
“Are you sure you want to watch that?” he asks. “We can watch something more exciting.”
“Like what?” I mutter. “I don’t see you coming up with anything.”
