They all laughed and Cecily said, “Unfortunately, I do not think you can make slapping uncouth wretches your hobby. Your hand would fall off.”
“Though it is an amusing thought to imagine Vivian running around striking fear into the heart of the ton’s dishonorable and disreputable men.” Cecily giggled.
“But also dangerous. Lord Brixten is a coward, but not all men are as weak as he is. I suspect Thomas would not be keen to support anything that put her in danger.” Charlotte pointed out.
“And I do not want the focus of my life to be men and their behavior.” Vivian added, surprising herself with the truth of the statement. “All of my life was preparing for a husband, everything we are taught centers on men. Our world is built for them, not for us. Let the world focus their efforts there, I will not focus mine.”
“Here! Here!” Cecily cheered, raising her teacup as though it were a flute of champagne. “Though I will admit, men do have their uses. It gets rather frustrating not being able to make any headway in this world as a single woman. I am tired of married women acting like I might steal their husbands from them. I have no wish to share, I want one of my own, and failing that I would like my independence.”
Cecily’s words sparked something inside Vivian. “So many of us live our lives at the mercy of men. Get a husband, or you will have no future.”
“Perhaps one day that will change. But until it does, what can we do?” Charlotte shrugged. “It is a pity that not everyone is as lucky as us when it comes to finding a good husband, or evenAndrea – you had more opportunities than most thanks to the money Agatha bequeathed to you after her inheritance gains.”
Vivian nodded, feeling as though gears in her mind were starting to turn. It was like watching someone trying to start a fire, there was something there but what?What can I do against society? I am just one person.
The grandfather clock chimed on the hour, and the thought vanished. Charlotte clapped a hand to her mouth. “Oh goodness! Is that the time? We will be late for the gallery opening.”
“Are you sure you do not want to come, Vivian?” Andrea asked as the women stood and moved towards the front door.
Vivian shook her head. “I do not want to be in public right now, I feel like everyone will be scrutinizing me and I have no time nor patience for it.”
“Very well.” Andrea hugged Vivian. “It was lovely seeing you.”
“And you.” Vivian hugged her back. “I am sure we will see each other again soon.”
“And we will figure out your purpose, I promise.” Cecily smiled at her. “I am glad you have come into our lives. It is always nice to have new friends.”
“I am too.” Vivian beamed at her. “Thank you.”
Her friends departed, and Vivian felt a glow settle over her chest. She might not know what she wanted, but she had friends for the first time in her life.It feels almost ungrateful to feel like there is still something missing.
It was not that her friends were not important, but they each had their own passions, dreams and desires. Andrea and Charlotte both had children of their own, and that clearly gave each of them joy.That is not a path for me.The thought sent a prickle through her.
She put it from her mind and was just trying to decide what to do when she heard a knock at the front door. She wondered if the others had forgotten something and opened it, smiling.
“Have you no decency?” Her mother hissed, striding into Vivian’s house before she could say another word.
Her butler gave Vivian a look, and she waved him down. She sensed him bristle, but knew he would obey the silent command. Her mother, however, seemed unaware of the exchange and continued into the house and toward the drawing room.
Vivian followed her, reminding herself to stand tall even as her mother chuntered continuously under her breath. Vivian only caught every other word.
“A pleasure to see you, Mother. Would you like some tea?” Vivian kept her voice placid as she beckoned Mrs. Bird over. “I can have some refreshments sent up.”
“I think that is the least you can do after the way you have disgraced me.” Her mother sniffed and flopped onto the sofa, crossing her hands in her lap. “Do you have any idea what you have put me through?”
“No,” Vivian replied without thinking.
She knew it was the wrong thing to say when her mother shot her a dirty look, sighing as though Vivian had dealt her a grievous blow.I have had far too little sleep to manage this.
After all, she and Thomas had spent most of the night before talking to one another.
“You may be a marchioness, Vivian, but you are still my daughter, and you will show me the respect I deserve.” Her mother dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief.
“I was not trying to be disrespectful, only truthful.” Vivian sat across from her mother. “I have no idea why you are here.”
Her mother waved her handkerchief at her, scowling. “Do not play dumb with me. The wholetonis talking about your little breakdown in the street. Honestly, Vivian, why on Earth did you need to pick a fight with the Viscount? You are married, and so is he. Where has this sudden bitterness come from?”
“What? Is that what the scandal sheets are saying?” Vivian clenched her fists.
