“It is not possible. He dislikes me!” Elizabeth shook her head forcefully. “I thought it was a dream! Yet your words tell me it really happened. I do not recall accepting… Oh! I must fix this. I need to get dressed and find him. It has all gone so wrong.”
Jane laid a hand on Elizabeth’s shoulder, preventing her from getting out of the bed. “You are the only one who insists that Mr. Darcy does not like you. Now, please, let us speak. We do not have much time to discuss this before Lady Catherine finds out.”
“Lady Catherine? I do not want her to ‘find out!’ She will disapprove almost as much as I do!” Elizabeth stopped struggling against Jane’s hand and leaned back into her pillows. “I must end this sham of an engagement before my reputation is ruined!”
“Elizabeth.” Jane’s words were firm. “Do not throw away this chance.”
“Chance at what? Being married to a superior, proud, haughty man? To be subject to his whims? Never!” Her words came out hot and acidic. She would not marry a man she did not love.
“Proud and haughty he may be, but he loves you. Charlotte said he expressed his sentiments very well.”
Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “Oh, yes, right after he said he ardently admired and loved me, he insulted our family, our connections… everything. Jane, how could you wish such a man on me?Youmight have chosen not to marry for love, but I will not give up on my dreams.” She immediately felt regret for her Lydia-like attitude, but struggled to know how to make amends.
Jane went silent. Her face was like a marble sculpture, beautiful yet oh, so cold. “I did marry for love, Elizabeth,” she said after a moment. “I married for the love of my family. It is time I tell you everything.”
Jane proceeded to relate to Elizabeth every detail of that fateful morning she had become engaged. Elizabeth listenedsilently. She tried to speak several times, but Jane always held up her hand to silence her.
“And just before I agreed to allow Papa to intervene, he began to cough violently. It went on for so long… He tried to hide the handkerchief, but I saw the blood.”
Jane fell silent. She fiddled with the skirt of her gown. Elizabeth said nothing, absorbing all her sister had said.
“So, you see, I did marry for love. I cannot repine my decision, for if our father is ailing, my marriage means my mother and sisters will have a place to live when he passes away.”
“Would you not have rather married for the love of your betrothed? Mr. Darcy worked on Mr. Bingley, preventing him from coming back! I have had it from Colonel Fitzwilliam. You would have me marry the man who destroyed the happiness of my most beloved sister? How can I betray you in such a way?”
Jane paled. “Stop it, Lizzy! Mr. Darcy is not to blame for Mr. Bingley’s caprice! He left me. That washischoice, not his friend’s and not his sisters’. Had he truly loved me, nothing would have stopped him from returning to my side. Would you have me tied to a man who listens to his sisters and his friend over his wife? At least with Mr. Collins I can exert some influence. My voice would have been drowned out by the likes of Caroline Bingley and Louisa Hurst had I married their brother.”
Elizabeth rallied as Jane’s words gave her another argument. “But why must I marry Mr. Darcy? I will have a place, too, will I not?”
Jane hesitated, and then shook her head.
Elizabeth gaped. “Jane? You would deny me a home?”
“You knowIwould not. But my husband…”
“Mr. Collins is a fool and easily led. You could—”
“No.” Jane replied harshly. “Despite his deficiencies, he is my husband, and you willnotinsult him. I am more aware of what influence I have over him than you are. It took weeks ofpersuading for Mr. Collins to allow me to invite you. He did not wish to see you again, calling you foolish and all manner of things. He only relented when the idea struck him that your visit would show you what you lost, make you feel regret for refusing him. He was not pleased that I invited Charlotte, too.”
“What has he against Charlotte?”
Jane shook her head. “She will be here soon. You can ask her then. Elizabeth, Mr. Collins will not let you live with us. He can likely be convinced to allow our younger sisters and Mama to stay at Longbourn, but he will not welcome you.”
“Mama would never allow me to be cast out.” Her words held doubt. She and her mother had not exchanged a dozen words since Elizabeth had refused Mr. Collins. Her letters, likewise, were not as warm as those she wrote to Jane. Maybe her motherwouldallow her son-in-law–hersavior–to refuse her second child a place in his home.
Jane shifted and stuck her hand in her pocket. Out came a letter and she unfolded it. “This came yesterday. Read the last paragraph.”
Elizabeth did as she was bid. The handwriting she instantly recognized as her mother’s.
Remind your selfish, stubborn sister that she had best return to Longbourn engaged or she will know my wrath. I have written to her only once since she left in December, and I will not do so again until I have word of her betrothal. She will not stay withmewhen your father dies.
It confirmed her innermost fears. “Is she still so set on this?” she said weakly, already knowing Jane’s answer. “Surely, she would not cast me out if I were in need?”
Jane nodded. “Every letter I have had from her contains something of this nature. When have you known our mother to cling so stubbornly to anything?”
Elizabeth’s heart sank. “She has never.”
“Precisely. Mama is set on this. She reminded me in one letter that at her word, Aunt Phillips would turn you away. Our aunt and uncle in London may welcome you, but they could not afford another mouth for long.”
