He huffed out a breath and shook his head. “I madeeverythingworse. I never told anyone I was looking into him. Figured it would be better that way…just in case.”
“In case you uncovered something too painful…”
“Yeah. But I never thought thejust in casecontingencywould be the PI finding him…along with his new wife and two little girls. He didn’t leave us for his music career. He left us for anotherfamily.That whole time, he was in a small town in California, living the life my mom had tried to build for them here. And he was doing it without a care in the world, like he hadn’t left anything or anyone behind.”
Atlas’s words slammed into me, each one piercing my heart and leaving me stunned. My god, not only had his dad abandoned him—abandonedthem—but he’d made Atlas feel like their whole family was unworthy. Like he and his brothers and their mom weren’t good enough.
Wrapping my hand around his neck, I pulled him down until our foreheads rested together. He closed his eyes on a heavy exhale, the weight of the world in that deep sigh. I didn’t know how to help. Didn’t know what to say to comfort him.
So, instead of struggling with the words that wouldn’t come, I pressed my lips against his, reminding him that I was here with him now. Thanking him without words for sharing something so deeply personal with me. For trusting me enough to do so.
Of course, the soft, sweet kiss I’d intended didn’t last long. Atlas tightened his grip on my hips, holding me to him as if he were afraid I’d disappear without the anchor of his touch. But that was fine with me, because I couldn’t get close enough.
I wrapped my legs around his waist, locking my ankles at the base of his spine, and held him as tightly as I dared.
Even though our bodies were pressed together, his tongue brushing against mine in an all-consuming kiss, I still wanted—needed—him closer. Wanted to feel every inch of his skin against mine. Wanted him inside me, as close as two people could possibly get.
As if Atlas read my mind, he cupped my ass and lifted me off the counter before carrying me to his bed. We didn’t speak as he shed his clothes before ridding me of mine. Not a word whispered as he kissed me all over, getting me ready with his fingers and his tongue. And only a soft moan from me and an answering groan from him when he finally slid inside.
He hooked my legs over his hips, his hands everywhere, his mouth never leaving mine. Over and over, he sank into me in slow, deep thrusts. As if we had all the time in the world.
As if he never wanted this to end.
I wasn’t so sure I wanted it to either. I would have gladly stayed forever in this cocoon with him, his body rocking into mine, our lips pressed together as we breathed the same air.
But the crash was inevitable. It always was with Atlas.
I was just grateful that, this time, when I came apart in his arms, pulling him with me, he slanted his mouth over mine. His kiss capturing the three words I’d been so tempted to speak aloud. Words I knew I couldn’t say.
Not when I didn’t know if this was real or if we’d both gotten too good at make-believe. Finding out the latter would crush me. I just didn’t know which would hurt worse—hearing him confirm what I feared…that this was all pretend. Or realizing I was the only one who’d stopped pretending.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
ATLAS
I normally hatedthe pomp and circumstance of a Starlight Cove homecoming game. There was too much bullshit all around. All I wanted to do was coach some goddamn football. But I couldn’t deny there was something worthwhile about experiencing it through Sutton’s eyes.
I’d been on edge all day, and only partially because of the town. But being on edge whenever I wasn’t near Sutton had become my baseline. If I could wear her around like a backpack, I would.
Besides that, I worried how she’d handle all this. Starlight Cove was a whole fucking lot on the best of days. But this town became an entirely different beast during homecoming.
I didn’t want her to feel singled out or alone, so I’d asked my mom to sit with her during the game. It could have been the charge I felt in the air, or it could have been that I kept glancing over at the stands every two minutes, but I noticed immediately when Sutton arrived. Those fears that she would be left out were instantly squashed.
She hadn’t been able to walk more than five steps without someone stopping her. Where that kind of interaction would have only pissed me off, Sutton met each interruption with abright smile. Seeing her here, in my town, being welcomed by the people I’d known more than half my life, all while wearing a jersey with my name on it, did something to me. Made me want to climb to the top of the bleachers and yell to the entire stadium that she wasmine.
I only wished it were true. Now, more than ever.
Especially since the other night when I’d cracked open my chest, baring my heart to her. Other than my brothers and mom, Sutton was the only other person in the world I’d shared that information with. Considering the aftermath that had followed once my family had found out, I never thought I’d be able to.
And then Sutton had come into my life, shifting…everything.
My gaze was on her when she finally sat next to Laurel, giving her daughter a quick hug. Seeing them here together, for me? I hadn’t realized how much it would mean to have the support of my girls.
“Holyshit,” Trey said. “Is that a smile?”
I immediately wiped the expression from my face and shot him a scowl. “I don’t smile.”
“I don’t know, man. Looked like a smile to me.” He elbowed me in the side. “You were thinking about the Unicorn play again, weren’t you?”
