“Come on, Daddy Grump. You’re a smart guy. You can figure it out. Just think about what my mom loves and go from there.”
My mind was already spinning, a dozen possibilities popping up, but I disregarded each one as soon as they came. None of them was good enough. None of them proved that I was in this for the long haul. That I loved Sutton. That I wanted her and Laurel by my side for the rest of my life.
I glanced around, hoping for inspiration—something,anything, that would help—when my gaze landed on a stack of books I’d ordered for Sutton before everything had happened. And a spark lit in my mind.
“Did you figure it out?” my mom asked, clearly reading the determination in my expression.
“Not yet, but I’m getting there.”
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
SUTTON
Every daythat went by without Atlas choosing us over his fears was another day in which I lost a little more faith that what Laurel and Quinn had said might possibly be true.
Fortunately, my daughter had kept me occupied all weekend, so I couldn’t dwell on the fact that the singular man I’d ever loved couldn’t be bothered to put up a little fight for me. Yesterday, we’d visited every antique store and flea market within a fifty-mile radius before grabbing dinner at the sushi place she loved. It had been well after dark by the time we’d gotten back. But instead of retreating to her cozy bedroom in Atlas’s house, she’d stayed in the cottage.
Thankfully, my mattress had been high enough off the floor that it hadn’t been ruined in the flood, so she’d slept with me, reminding me of when we’d done that when she was younger.
We set up her laptop between us and binged the latest serial killer documentary before finally falling asleep at 3 a.m. But her activities hadn’t stopped there. She’d filled today as well, making me try on every piece of clothing I owned that hadn’t been ruined and make piles to keep or donate.
Four hours later, I was exhausted and just wanted to veg for a while.
“Seriously, Lolo, I love you so much. You are the light of my life. But for the love of god, I don’t want to doanything. I just want to sit and eat chips and scroll through mindless nonsense on my phone. Can we do that?Please?” I asked, collapsing into one of the lawn chairs in the living room.
She blew out a long sigh and took a seat next to me. “Fine. I was just trying to get your mind off this shithole you call a home.”
“First of all, I didn’t call it a home. You’re not here, so at best, it’s four walls and a roof. And second, it’s notthatbad.”
“Are you kidding? It’s worse than the apartment in Schenectady.”
I thought back to that place—the first apartment I’d rented on my own after scoring my first contract. I hadn’t even started paying off student loans, so I couldn’t afford much. There was no denying it had been a dump.
“I can see the resemblance with the lack of finished walls,” I said, glancing around. “But I think it’s cute in here.”
Laurel rolled her eyes. “Be for real, Mom. You think sitting on lawn chairs with a plastic tablecloth covering the subfloor iscute?”
“Well, it’s better than the alternative.”
Laurel tipped her head to the side and raised a brow at me. “Is it, though?”
“Is it better than living with a guy who decimated my heart?” I asked. “Yeah, I think so. He’s just like all the rest, except this time I got in too deep.”
“I thought I told you, Atlas is different.”
“I don’t know. It doesn’t feel very different from where I’m sitting.”
“Give it a little bit and keep an open mind,” she said, throwing back words I’d told her countless times when we’d first moved here.
“Those words sound familiar.”
“Yeah, well, they worked, didn’t they? I love it here in this stupid little town with too many fucking festivals. Where else could we possibly live where I could go to the library for a study group, swing by a book club meeting while there,andbuy a vibrator from the local sex toy dealer?”
“Oh no,” I said, shaking my head. “Please do not let Mabel talk you into her special this month. You need to start small, Lolo. Maybe a bullet vibe?—”
“Jesus, Mom, I didn’t literally buy a sex toy. It was just an example.”
I blew out a breath and sank back into my chair. “Okay, well, I’m just saying… Masturbation is totally normal, and it’s fine if you want to explore—healthy, even. And there are definitely worse places to get a toy hookup than from Mabel.”
