We get ourselves ready for sleep and get settled; he loves being little spoon and there’s nothing I love more than curling myself around him.
“Hey,” I murmur against his neck, “I’m proud of you.”
“I’m proud of you too,” he whispers, before we both drift off to sleep.
Chapter 18
Donovan
Iwasexpectingthingsto change after coming out to my mom, and with Diablo finding out, but the world doesn’t feel any different today. Classes have continued as normal, and my interactions with people are the same as they were before the weekend. I guess I feel lighter, I’m not holding onto my secret as tightly anymore; it’s Stephen’s secret I’m keeping now. Even though I’m out, it’s not as though I can walk up to him and kiss him hello… maybe that’s why nothing feels different.
As much as I’m looking forward to seeing him later, I’m worried. All that talk of the media training yesterday, it doesn’t bode well for our relationship. Even hearing the word scandal leave his lips felt painful. We were both too exhausted to talk about it properly, and I managed to suggest getting a good night’s sleep instead, but I’m dreading hearing more about what the media person said.
My mood also isn’t helped by feeling so worried about Beth. Her message about going back to the clubhouse and finding out it’s definitely over with my brother is making me feel sick. She’s been living there with him and can’t stay, soshe’s moving in with one of the guys, Slim. She’s safe, but she’s alone, and I know everyone keeps saying it’s not my fault, but it’s hard not to feel responsible.
“Donovan!”
I smile at Jamie’s voice behind me and turn to find him skipping in my direction.
“Hey,” I say, as he pulls me into a hug.
“Hey, do you have class now?” he asks. “Or can we go for coffee so you can fill me in?”
“Classes are all done, and coffee sounds great!”
We link arms and wander in the direction of one of the coffee stands while he tells me about some drama happening in one of his dance classes. After ordering a coffee to go, we find a sunny spot on the grass to sit.
“So, tell me everything!” he says. “Your message said it went okay, but I want details.”
“Things definitely went better than expected with my mom and stepdad, they’re with me and support me.”
“Ahh that makes me so happy.” He reaches over to hold my hand, reminding me so much of Beth that it brings the memory of her tear-stricken face back to me. “Wait, why am I happier than you?”
I sigh, “My brother was there, and it didn’t go so well with him.”
“What happened?”
“He’s in the same motorcycle club my dad started, they have rules about gay people, and he chose to stick with them. A part of me thought that might happen, they’re his found family, like how you said.”
“I’m sorry, Donovan. Even if you expected it, it’s still a dick move on his part.”
“Yeah… to make matters worse, he’s been seeing Beth, and they broke up because of me.”
“When you say, ‘because of you’, what exactly do you mean?” he asks.
“She gave him an ultimatum, if he couldn’t accept me then they’d be done. He left.”
“Good on her,” he says, and I glance up at him in shock.
“What?”
“She did the right thing, and that’s not on you; the only person to blame for their break-up is your asshole brother. Beth was being an ally, not putting up with his homophobic shit, he was the one who chose wrong. I’m not saying it doesn’t suck, and I’m not saying I’m happy for the way it turned out, but this is not on you, sweetie.”
“It’s hard to believe that though,” I say.
“Well I’m telling you that’s the truth, and I’m sure Beth has said the same thing too.”
I nod. “Yeah, she did say that.”
