Chapter Four
Iwoke to a siren blaring through the building and the sound of heavy boots clanging up the metal stairs. They stayed on the second floor and went toward the opposite end of the building, so it was a small consolation that whatever had happened was far away. I blinked my dry eyes and shivered, wrapping the blanket even closer around me. I looked toward the window at the back of the cell and saw sunset was approaching fast.
There was only a thin pane of glass and no insulation, just bars. Fall was coming quickly, and I wondered what they did when it got cold. I chanced a look over the edge of the bunk and saw Ze with his eyes closed, chest rising and falling slowly. I watched him longer than was safe, but there was something about him that made me want to stare. I needed to memorize every dark hair in his beard, every fine wrinkle around his eyes. He was made of strong angles in his face, with a long nose. It slightly flared on the end, a typical lion shifter trait. His hair was long and thick with waves that curled around the side of his neck where it flattened out on the thin pillow.
But it was his lips that kept drawing me back. Everything else about him was hard and rough, except those plump, slightly pink lips. They looked decadent and soft, completely kissable. They hadn’t felt soft when he’d pretended to kiss me earlier. I could imagine being held by him with all that muscle and hard strength, but this time, those lips would sip instead of devouring, softly insist I respond, open, and accept. The longer I stared at him, the more I wanted to see. I wanted to see if his chest was hairy or smooth, like mine. Was he all abs and muscle or did he have some softness to him somewhere? I even wondered if his feet were as perfect as the rest of him. Did he have hair on his toes? I let my gaze move back up his body slowly, taking in all there was. Finally, I returned to his face and found his golden eyes looking straight into mine.
“If you’re done staring, get down here. We need to go over some things while the guards are busy and the siren can drown out our voices. We need to talk without being overheard.”
I sucked in a breath and pulled my head back to hide. Holy shit, he had caught me checking him out. What was he going to do to me now?
“We don’t have a lot more time. You can be embarrassed and hide later. Right now, get your ass down here, or I’m going to have to make you.”
I didn’t want to think about how he’d make me, so I moved fast, jumping down off my bunk and standing next to the bottom mattress where Ze was now sitting. He patted the bed beside him insistently, and I perched on to edge as ordered. Then he leaned into my side, turned his head and caught my gaze.
“Now, I gave you a shock on purpose earlier, but that wasn’t for you. I know we’re being watched, so we have to play this game right for a few weeks, just until they get someone else more interesting. I want them to think I’m using you. You need to act like my boy. If I give you orders, you obey, no matter what. When we go out onto the floor, you never walk away from me. You stay by my side at all times. We eat together, shower together, sit together, and go insane with boredom together. I cannot protect you if you don’t do your part. Do you understand?”
“I need to be your slave like Culin said, is that it?”
His whole face clouded with anger when I said Culin’s name. His face shifted, features broadening, pupils elongating and glowing slightly. He snarled, and his teeth lengthened, then the snarl turned into a deep vibration in his chest. I was used to this when my brother or dad would get mad. It was a physical reaction to strong emotions that made the shift come so quickly, and sometimes unbidden. But this emotion wasn’t my dad’s concern for me or my brother’s jealous rage. Ze was pissed at me for comparing him to Culin. What the hell was wrong with me? Why the fuck did I keep doing things to piss him off? I didn’t even know him! He could snap my neck right now, and he would already be in jail. What else could they do to him? I needed to start being smart like I’d been told before I got killed or worse.
“I’m sorry, I’m very, very sorry. I didn’t mean to say you’re anything like that psycho, okay? I’m just nervous, and when I get nervous, I talk without thinking. I can also be a bit of a smart ass, but I’m guessing sarcasm isn’t really the best approach in here.”
I had to have imagined the smirk on his lips before he shifted back to his full human form and went on, talking fast and quiet.
“Yeah, don’t go around being a smart ass. I don’t want to have to fight for your fucking honor. Now, listen, I’m going to have to pretend to use you, do you understand? You tell me right now, do you want to pretend to submit or pretend to fight? The first one is easier. We have to be together all the time, so we’re going to get very familiar with each other, very fast. I’m not going to actually fuck you. I’ll make it look good though. I’ll need you to do your part, or we’ll have more to deal with. No one can know or even question that it’s fake. I’ll have to come on you so there won’t be any questions.”
I nodded at everything he said and followed along the best I could. He was giving me a gift. Granted, he was explaining how he was going to sexually assault me every night and day for the foreseeable future, but there were reasons. And those reasons had consequences that would be much more traumatic than fake sex and cum soaked skin. I could do this. I could play along. He may be gruff, but he was being his own kind of decent, and the least I could do was help.
“I’ll help, I’ll follow along with everything. Wherever you go, I go. I’ll be your shadow and do everything you say.” I ducked my head, and I couldn’t hide the fact I was flushed and embarrassed talking about the rest. “I’ll play along and not fight. You do whatever you think we have to do and I won’t protest. I think if they believe I’m doing everything voluntarily, if not loving it, at least it will be consensual. I won’t cause you any trouble, I promise.”
When I finished promising my complete compliance, I lifted my head to see his reaction. Ze stared into my eyes so long that I started to fall into the deep gold. I don’t know how much time passed, but the sound of the sirens abruptly ended, startling me out of my trance. I realized I had leaned so far forward that I was within kissing distance of him. I sat back so quickly that my ass fell off the edge of the mattress and I landed on the floor, smacking my tailbone on the hard tile.
A deep rumble came from his direction and I looked up to find Ze with his hand over his mouth, trying to hide the fact that he was laughing. I was in pain, but I had to smile a little, too, rubbing my aching ass and taking this moment of laughter while I could. It only lasted a few more seconds when the loud sound of boots on the walkway sounded again, much closer this time. A guard was yelling something, and when the boots got closer, I could finally hear them clearly.Dear Gods, why don’t niffs at least get the enhanced hearing if we can’t shift?
“Animals, all of you are nothing but fucking animals. You might look and pretend to be like us, but the truth always shows itself. Jones just tried to eat his fucking cellmate when he shifted. That rabbit will never be the same because his cellmate couldn’t keep his animal under control. You all want to eat each other? You aren’t happy with the food we give you? Fine. You won’t get rations for the next twenty-four hours. No showers and no floor time either. Maybe if you all get hungry enough, you’ll kill each other and save us the hassle of watching this fucking zoo.”
The boots walked out of the central area and ended with the clanging of the guard door slamming. The entire block was silent. Eventually, I could hear silent shuffles turn into soft whispers. The voices grew louder but never raised up in protest. Why didn’t they yell and demand to be treated fairly? This wasn’t legal. It couldn’t be.
“Why isn’t anyone protesting this? This isn’t even legal. How can they get away with this? Aren’t they supposed to feed prisoners three meals a day at the very least? That’s Allusian law.”
Ze didn’t answer me directly. He stood up from the bed and turned his back on me, walking to the window and staring out into the distant sunset.
“No, it’s not legal, but they do it anyway. They do it about once a month for whatever bullshit reasons they can come up with. We’ve learned to try to stash a little food in our cells for when they decide we need to starve for a while again. It’s not legal, it’s not fair, but they get away with it because no one ever gets out of here to tell anyone.”
“Wait, what do you mean no one ever gets out? I met a guy on the bus here who said he’d been inside before. If he got out, then why didn’t he say something?”
“Was that the wolf or the coyote?”
“The coyote, Jarvis. He said he’d been in before and told me some rules, like using a different name. Wait, how did you know I wanted to be called Nial? I never told anyone but Jarvis and Kane, the wolf. I never told you, but you knew.”
I hadn’t thought about it before, but it was strange and suspicious. How the hell had he known a name I only told two people? Well, Sallyann had known, but she read my mind. Fuck, could Ze read my mind? Was that even a thing with our kind?
“Did you read my mind? Can you do that? Oh, my gods! Please tell me you can’t read my mind.”
Ze looked over his shoulder for a second, then turned back to the slowly sinking sun.
“No, I can’t read your mind. I found out another way, and you don’t need to know how, so don’t ask. You know you can get up off the floor, your ass must be numb by now.”
