Ze shook his head like he was discarding a stray thought and shifted, so his back was fully facing me now. Until he had mentioned the floor, I had forgotten how much my ass did hurt. I propped one hand on the mattress and levered up to stand by the bunk. I wanted to do something, anything, but there was nothing to do and nowhere to go. We were stuck in this tiny space for the next twenty-four hours at least. The time had just started, and I was already feeling trapped. Maybe if I kept Ze talking, the panic wouldn’t take over, and my powers wouldn’t try to surface again. I couldn’t keep passing out in here. I was going to have to find another way to deal with the surge when it happened. But the best way to deal with it was to prevent it altogether. I needed a distraction, and Ze was the only choice.
“Ze? Did you know the shifters that they were talking about? How could they have put a wolf and a rabbit in a confined space together? That was a disaster waiting to happen. Didn’t they know that it was a horrible idea?”
Ze shifted again, shoulders hunching a little when he crossed his arms and leaned them into the deep window sill.
“Yeah, they know, and they did it on purpose. They wanted this to happen, some of them might have even taken bets on how long it would take. The fuckers set us up like pins and knock us down for their own shits and giggles.”
Ze continued to stare out the window until the sun dipped below the horizon, leaning heavily on the sill. How thoughts seemed to weigh him down, the longer he stayed silent, the more his shoulders sagged until finally he bent and dropped his head to his arms.
“I know them both. Rudy has a mate and children on the outside. He's a good guy, timid of course, but nice enough. He got caught skimming from his job. He's just a desk job guy who made a bad decision. He should have gotten a fine, but the judge hated all shifters and wanted to set a precedent. I hope he'll be all right.”
“What about the other one? Jones?”
Ze shuffled his feet and flexed his back, but didn't lift his head. He did grip his arms tighter when he finally responded.
“Jones is the worst of the worst in here. He's crazy with no impulse control and a hair trigger. He should be in twenty-four-hour lock up, but he's Culin's right-hand guy. He manages to bribe the guards, so he stays here. Three-quarters of the inmates here should never have been placed here in the first place. They're like Rudy. But the real criminals aren't even treated the way they should be, and the ones like Rudy suffer for it. Something needs to be done. It has to stop.”
Intellectually, I had always known that the justice system was skewed never to give us the benefit of the doubt in this province. I knew it wasn’t fair, but there was nothing to be done, so I just let it pass as a stray thought and moved on with my life, but here there were real shifters, real lives affected by the things I had let go as inconsequential to my real life. How naive I had been, all of us had been, that it would never affect us. Here was this rabbit shifter, husband and father, seriously injured for no other reason than it gave amusement to the guards. It was the worst kind of sick, but there were still no viable ways to fight it. Especially in here. It seemed hopeless.
“What can we do about it?”
Ze watched the very last ray of light disappear, then turned to face me. The only light in the room was streaming in through the bars from the central floor area so his face was dimly lit and the rest was in shadow. He looked huge, looming over me from the darkness. His eyes caught the light and glowed like all cats’ eyes, and I loved the sense of familiarity. It reminded me of my father’s eyes when they caught the light.
Then the first wave of homesickness hit. I was trapped in here, I couldn’t get out, there was no escape, and there would never be a chance to see my father again. He would never come here. He’d be insane to set foot in a prison to see me when he had been avoiding places like this his whole life.
The more I realized my situation was permanent and hopeless, the faster my heart raced. I needed to calm down. I had to stop the panic from rising, yet again, but I was losing the battle. I could feel the energy swirling inside me for the second time today, and I didn’t have the strength to fight it again. I was going to have to let it go and damn the consequences. It didn’t matter anyway. I was never getting out. What did it matter if I survived in here? I could just let go and let the Syndicate come and get me. Or I could just decide I didn’t want to do this anymore and give up altogether. Nothing mattered anymore.
“Nial, stop it. Stop whatever you’re thinking right now. Don’t give me that look. No, I can’t read your mind, but I can tell you’re starting to panic. Stop it. I know it’s hard, but you have to stop and think. It’s not as hopeless as you might think. There might be a way to help, we’ll have to think about it, but right now you have to stop and calm down.”
I tried to listen, I did. The longer he kept talking, the more I couldn’t believe he thought he could just tell me to calm down and I would. But I was calming down. It was actually working. He was walking closer to me, one cautious step at a time as not to spook me. He raised his hands to my waist height, then to my shoulder height and finally easily covered my shoulder with his large hands, his fingers meeting in the middle of my back between my shoulder blades.
“Just listen to my voice. That’s it, breathe in and out. Match my breathing and feel your body calm down. Good, that’s perfect. Now, close your eyes and just listen to my voice. You’re okay. Everything will be okay. I’ll make sure you’re always okay in here. Do you believe me?”
I nodded my head slowly, not wanting to speak and break this spell he had woven around me. His voice had somehow calmed my energy enough that I could push it back down. I didn’t have to worry about letting it go now, thanks to Ze.
“That’s very good. Just believe that no matter what happens here, I’ll always have your best interest in mind. I’ve committed myself to helping you now so that nothing like what happened tonight will happen to you.”
I opened my eyes and finally looked into Ze’s eyes. He was taller than me, but with his hands on my shoulders and his face dipped down to return my gaze, he seemed the perfect height to me. I was feeling better, but I needed more. I needed a connection, something I could hold on to. Something real. So I took a chance, lifted up onto my tiptoes and kissed him.
At first, he didn’t respond. I pressed closer, finally licking those lush pink lips and taking a small nip of his bottom lip with my teeth. And that’s all it took for him to go wild. He tightened his arms around me, pulling me flush from toes to mouth, and I’d never felt anything more overwhelming and amazing. He consumed me. His mouth was just as luscious as it had looked, but his tongue was even better. It invaded my mouth with gentle licks and swipes, exploring every inch. He licked the roof of my mouth, and I got tingles down my spine. Next, he sucked my tongue into his mouth with such a filthy rhythm that I found myself matching the rhythm with my lower half, rubbing against him in time to his sucking.
It was so fucking wrong. I should have been running away from this criminal I didn’t even know. I had no idea what he was in here for. No idea who he was or if I could trust him as I’d said I did. But right this second, with his hardening cock rubbing my belly and his thick tongue seducing me one suck and kiss at a time, I couldn’t have cared less about any of those answers. I had wanted him the first time I’d seen him looking down into the courtyard earlier today, felt the need deep in my gut, and now was my chance to have him. I wasn’t giving that up for logic or reason.
“Get on the bed, face down and pull your pants and underwear down under your ass. I’m going to make us both feel good, but I’m not going to fuck you, don’t ask.”
I thought about asking anyway, but something about his tone told me not to try. He was on edge, and I didn’t want to do anything to set him off or make him stop. I crawled into the lower bunk, lay face down as instructed and wiggled my pants and underwear down. My cock was so hard that I needed to slide my hand down to move it to a more comfortable position. Ze’s voice stopped me cold.
“Don’t you dare touch that cock. That’s mine now. You’re mine, and I say when you get to touch it and when you can’t. If you ask me nicely, I might let you reposition it.”
Taken aback by his reaction, I debated how to respond. I knew what he wanted me to say, but I had another idea I wanted to try. Since this was a night of firsts in this situation, I decided to say what the hell and try something new.
“Please, I don’t want to do anything you don’t want me to do, so would you move it for me…sir?”
I heard the deep growl of the lion right before I felt his hand slide under me and grip my leaking cock. I lifted up on my knees slightly to give him access, and he used the room to drive me even higher. His large hand encased my entire length, gripping and then releasing, only to do it again, and again, and again. His thumb ran over my pouring tip, and then his hand came up to gather the liquid and rub it all over my aching length. With my hips elevated, I attempted to fuck into his hand for the release I desperately needed, but I was met with a slap on my exposed ass and his hand going away.
“I said don’t move, didn’t I, cub?”
“Yes, sir. I’m sorry, sir.”
