“Lewis—” Gen presses a hand to his chest, and his gaze drops to her as if he’s momentarily startled. She pulls him aside and they talk amongst themselves for a minute.
This isn’t why I came here. I don’t want Lewis to be angry with Tyler. I’m not happy with him, but this is between us.
“Mira.” Lewis is staring at me, and I realize they’re both waiting for me to say something. “Do you need me to do anything?”
“No. Thank you. Actually, Lewis, there is one more thing.”
Lewis has been supportive, and we’re still close, despite his new relationship. I should have confessed sooner, but I wasn’t ready. I’m not sure I’m ready now, but holding on to fears has gotten me nowhere. “Please don’t be angry, okay?”
Lewis sits on the stool beside me. “Go ahead,” he says gently.
“I lied about why I owe the money,” I blurt. Lewis’s face is immobile, but a shadow crosses his eyes, as if he suspects what I’m about to say. “I’ve been supporting my mom financially since I graduated.”
Lewis lets out a loud breath and looks away.
“The payments have gotten worse these last couple of years. She told me her life was in danger, and I borrowed a large amount. I couldn’t pay it back fast enough…You know the rest of the story.”
Lewis doesn’t look at me.
Desperation bubbles up my chest. I wanted to finally be open with him about my mom, but now I’m not sure I should have told him.
“You’ve been so adamant about me staying away from her.” My voice falters and I take a deep breath. “And then I went and did this. It didn’t seem a stretch that you’d get fed up. I worried that you’d cut me out of your life the way you’ve asked me to cut her out of mine. I know it’s not rational, but…”
Lewis stares at his still-empty glass. I’m rambling, trying to explain, to make him understand.
“Lewis? Please say something.”
He sets the glass on the counter, spins on the stool, and walks to the front door. The screen slams into the frame at his exit.
I ordinarily bottle up tears, but these days, they spring from my eyes like it’s their business, slipping down my cheeks. I lower my head to the counter and feel Gen’s hand on my shoulder.
“It’s okay, Mira. It’s going to be okay. Give him time. He’s not happy, but he knows how difficult the situation is with your mom.”
I hear her words, but the only thing that penetrates is that the two people I want in my life the most have walked out on me.
Chapter Twenty-Five
I go to Zach’s house and tell him everything about my mom and the money, because there is no reason to keep it a secret any longer. He is totally pissed that I lied, but then he cooks us popcorn and we watch back-to-back episodes of Game of Thrones.
That’s what I like about Zach; he gets things off his chest and forgives. It’s a good quality. But while we are watching GoT, my chest is scoured and sore, and I’m having difficulty swallowing.
Tyler freaking left me. Right after we…And now Lewis is so angry. Will he ever talk to me again?
A piece of popcorn bounces dead center off my forehead.
“Snap out of it,” Zach says.
I smile halfheartedly. No way am I getting into the dirty details about Tyler with Zach. Explaining it to Lewis was bad enough. But this is nice. As terrible as things are, I still have friends, and that’s something. Some of my worst fears have been realized tonight with Lewis walking out once he heard the truth, and Tyler…what he did, so wrong. But I’m still standing. And I’m not entirely alone.
I stay with Zach over the next few days, going in to work and doing my best to act like the guy I’ve always cared about didn’t tear my heart from my chest, and that my best friend isn’t so mad he won’t speak to me. I’ve also visited John and Becky and explained to them the situation with my mom. They weren’t happy that I lied, or that my mom has been using me as her personal bank account. I did not mention that I think the guys who beat me up were hitmen for the dude I owe. There’s only so much parental units can take without wigging out, no matter how far into adulthood you get.
“No going out alone until you get the money paid off,” John said. So obviously, he was concerned about that very issue without me having to confirm it.
I could literally see the pain on his face when I told him I wanted to pay off the debt by myself. He argued with me, rubbing a red mark into his forehead. It was killing him not to be able to take care of this, but somehow I feel that if I’m forced to get out of the rest of this situation myself, I won’t allow it to happen again. That I’ll no longer be susceptible to my mom’s manipulation.
I’m not stupid—if I think my life or anyone else’s is in danger, I’ll ask John and Becky for the money. But for now, the guy I owe was happy with the after-tax money I received from my signing bonus. He’s allowing me to pay the rest in installments over the next few weeks. I guess he figures if I’m dead, he gets nothing.
It’s another long afternoon in the office as I work overtime to prepare for the festival. Despite the mountain of work Hayden and I have, we’ve managed to remain afloat. It’s amazing how productive I can be when trying to keep my mind off things.
