It was obvious the second he came to the same conclusion. His lips flattened and even though his eyes were dilated with lust as he stared at me, he backed away and disappeared into the crowd.
Chapter 11
I spent the night alone in my bed, fighting the urge to go find someone to fuck senseless. I was kidding myself with that line of thinking. There was only one person I wanted to sink my dick into, and that would not happen.
I couldn’t afford to let myself fall under her spell again. I was already furious with myself for jumping straight into the shower and jerking off like a fucking fifteen-year-old. Thinking about how her nipples pressed against me, the view down the small gap in her t-shirt, the warmth of her body pressed against me. And those tattoos I desperately wanted to see.
I’d come so damn hard thinking about being inside her, I thought I’d gone blind.
The irony of it was being with Waverley remained a fantasy. I’d never fucked her. I was meant to be her first. But she gave it away to someone else. And that was enough to freeze the sexual fog that clouded my brain. I tossed and turned most of the night but told myself over and over she was off limits.
Connor wasn’t going to guilt me into anything. If Waverley left again which I knew she would, then it would have nothing to do with me.
Over the last couple of days, we had tagged two of the three guys who had been a part of Connor’s attack. Thanks to Kansas, we knew where they lived, worked, what they drove, their routines, their family information. The third was out of town and we had no way of knowing when he’d be back. War and I sneaked in and put cameras at their houses and Kansas was monitoring them.
King was happy enough for us to have taken out the guy in the Shed but he wanted us to be careful with the rest of them so we put surveillance in their homes, he wanted to know what intel we could get from them before we made our move.
It was bugging War to hold off. He’d barely been sated by ending that other motherfucker. But he would abide by King’s plan. It was the right play. We needed to find out what we could in relation to what they knew about Danica and how Waverley and Warren played into that.
We were holding church this afternoon so King could fill us in on what his plans were for the Kingsmen.
Instead of hanging around the club, I got on my bike and headed out of the compound, with no actual destination in mind. Sometimes the open road helped to free up my mind. I needed it with everything going on right now.
I rode through town, then hit Route 23 and drove for about a half hour before pulling over at the Sit N Chat Diner. It wasn’t the most aesthetic of places, but it had friendly service and the best French dip sandwich I’d ever tasted, especially the chili one. I ordered it with a side of mozzarella sticks and a diet coke.
We used to come here when we were in high school. At first, Connor would pick us up in his truck. When Warren and I got our bikes, we’d ride over. Waverley would ride with Warren, but when things changed for us, she rode with me.
It’s a pretty big thing having your girl riding at your back, and I remembered how happy I was to have her there, her arms and legs wrapped around me, her cheek pressed to my shoulder. Back then, I’d hoped things would never change.
Things were changing long before she left. We were becoming more involved in the club. King wanted us patched in as soon as possible. Part of me wondered if it was because he knew Warren was contemplating leaving with Waverley.
I’d always said I would go with them. Warren told us we’d get our degrees and come back home, but I wasn’t cut out for college. Staying in high school was bad enough, but King wanted us to graduate. It mattered to him we got a decent education.
None of us were as smart as Waverley though, she got straight A’s. It was no wonder she got into the college she wanted.
I wondered if, in my own fucked up way, I’d been pushing her away because I knew she was going to leave me behind. But Waverley held on. She was always waiting after class for me, jumping on the bike without hesitation. She rarely went to high school parties, preferring to hang out with us at the club.
When we had just turned eighteen, my dad was sent to prison for a few decades after a DWI, which resulted in him killing someone. I had been backing off because the MC had helped make sure my dad was safe. I felt indebted to them, even though it was always in my future to stay here. I was still being a possessive asshole.
Warren was pulling her towards him, involving her in everything he could. I understood, they were twins, they’d barely spent a night apart let alone been states apart. It killed him that morning when he woke to find she was gone.
It fucking killed me too, and it was my fault. I didn’t have to do what I did. I could have talked to her, but all I did was some stupid tit-for-tat bullshit because she’d proved to me I wasn’t good enough for her.
We were supposed to have the summer together before she left. But it all changed that night and we’d fucked up any chance for us to be together.
Last night, dancing with her, holding her in my arms brought it all back and fuck, I wanted her. I wanted to taste her lips, feel her warm, soft skin. To know what it felt like to sink into her.Fuck. I didn’t know if there would ever be a chance she’d be leaving again, and I had no intention of starting something that would go nowhere. Plus, she hated me.
Except, last night, the way she looked at me, I didn’t see hatred in her eyes. And who was to say we had to start anything? I wouldn’t say no to hate fucking. I reckoned she would hate fuck me real good given the chance.
I didn’t give a shit about that guy back in North Carolina. He’d let her leave. Who knew what she’d told him about where she was going but if she were mine, I’d make sure I knew what was going on and where the fuck she was going, and I would be right there beside her.
Shit, I had to stop thinking like this. I’d be starting my period before I knew it. For the last five years, I had believed loving someone wasn’t worth it. You only ended up hurting each other, and that was why I got my sex where I wanted it, when I wanted it, and then I was done.
I worried about Connor and War. Not only was their relationship doomed because the MC would never allow them to stay if they were found out, but if anything broke them up, years of friendship would be thrown away. Just as it had been for Waverley and me, we’d been friends first and I’d lost that too.
After eating my food, I went outside and sat sideways on my bike, watching the traffic going by. People stared at me, they always did. I was used to it. Assumptions were made about me instantly, the tattoos, the bike, and the cut. They were right. I wasn’t someone they wanted to mess with.
My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I fished it out to see a text from War. He wanted to know where I was. Church was starting early. I let him know I was on my way back, connected the Bluetooth to my helmet, something King made us all do after what happened to Connor, and started up the bike.
