I return my hands to the railing, which has become my crutch in this conversation. “I’m still scared. I thought I was doing the right thing for you by hiding that letter, and it turns out I was screwing up.”
“We all make mistakes. It’s what you do after that counts. I can’t guarantee things will work out between you and Lauren. There aren’t many guarantees in life, but you’ll definitely get things wrong if you never try.”
“I don’t even know where to begin.” I bite my lip. “She’s been hurt before. She’s already doubted herself after being left by Austin, and I probably made all of that worse.”
I was so consumed in getting everything right this time.I thought I was being smart, that I was protecting her. I was trying so hard not to hurt her, but I did anyway.
“I guess you better get ready to do some groveling.” Mom smirks. “You need to show her you’ve learned from your mistakes. Show her you love her and believe she’s more than worthy of standing in the rain with. Heck, forgetstandingin the rain. Lauren is wonderful. Show her she’s more than enough todancein the rain with.”
As if on cue, a clap of thunder roars overhead, and raindrops slowly pepper my warm skin.
“What if I screwed up too much? What if she realizes she’s too good for me?”
“You’re the one in control of your actions. Be the man Lauren deserves. I know you’re capable.” Mom rubs my shoulder with a smile.
The gentle pitter patter of the rain turns into a downpour as fear and hope dance together inside of me. I know what I need to do.
I shoot toward my truck, but Mom’s arm stops me. “Where are you going?”
“To show Lauren I’m willing to dance in the rain with her.”
Chapter Fifty-Three
Lauren
Sandra Bullock’s character,fresh out of the shower, is fighting off a little white dog as she tries to get a towel when the on-and-off drizzle we’ve had throughout the day turns torrential.
“Did y’all know it was supposed to storm today?”
The girls shake their heads as I turn up the volume a couple of notches.
Callie leans into me on my left-hand side, whispering, “Are you doing okay?”
I nod. I still have a lot I need to figure out with Jax, but my conversation with my dad today was encouraging. In a lot of ways it was exactly what I needed. A movie day followed by researching and applying for grants with Mom should clear my to-do list enough for me to come up with some way to prove to Jax I’ll always be there for him.I’d like to make up with him before ringing in the New Year tonight.
Callie continues to eye me carefully as she draws back.
“Watch the movie.” I point to the screen. “She’s about to run into a naked Ryan Reynolds. You can’t tell me you’re not all over that.”
She gives me a smirk, looking a little reassured that I can at least make a joke right now. I’ve still been a little off today, distracted by my constant attempts to figure out exactly what I need to do for Jax to get through to him.
Just as Callie settles back in, her phone lights up, bringing a deluge of light into the dark room.
I glance in her direction, simply because the light catches my eye, but I could’ve sworn I saw Jax’s name on her screen before she quickly flips it over. I’m going crazy. Maybe I need to stop overthinking this and just show up on his doorstep tonight.
A guilty smile creeps onto Callie’s face. “Sorry, no texting in the theater. I’ll turn it off.”
I turn back toward the TV, smoothing a hand over Bella’s back as she curls into my side, lightly snoring, but out of the corner of my eye, I see Callie turn her brightness down to look at her screen.
“Is everything okay?”
“I’m about to see Ryan Reynolds’s sweet bottom. I couldn’t be better.”
“Oh my god!” Olivia grimaces. “Please never say that again.”
“Come on. Ryan isn’t your type? He’s brunette like Rhett.” Callie wiggles her eyebrows.
“He’s a good-looking man, but I still don’t want to hear aboutanyone’s‘sweet bottom.’” She shudders.
