He nods in agreement. Then he nudges the plastic bag I have sitting at my feet, containing my new book. “So, a romance book, huh? Are you getting soft on me, moving on from fantasy to cheesy rom-coms?”
I know by his tone that he’s teasing me, but I still can’t help the fire that sets my cheeks ablaze as my embarrassment grows. “This is the first romance book I’ve ever picked up, but it sounded like it had a good story. I like happy endings. What can I say?”
“Our fantasy books have happy endings too. Just usually it’s the hero winning some battle or saving a whole civilization.”
“Yeah, but every once in a while, a girl wants to be swept off her feet. No matter how tough we may act, we all want to love and be loved. If I can find a little piece of that feeling in a book, then so be it.”
I’m a little shocked by the raw truth that just escaped me.I stuff another spoonful of ice cream into my mouth to distract myself from the thoughtful silence Andrew responds with.
“You’re loved.” Andrew finally says. “I mean your family loves you. Your friends love you. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t love you.”
Does he love me?I push the thought aside. “Yes, that’s true. I’m not saying I’m unhappy in my life, or I don’t feel loved. I’m just saying I don’t have the kind of love where you ache to spend every waking moment with that person because not only is he your favorite person, but you are your favorite version of yourself when you’re with him. Eventually, I want someone who will take me out for a fancy dinner date or stay in to bake with me and build a blanket fort to watch movies in.”
He raises his eyebrows. “For this being your first romance book and not having that kind of love in your life, you sure do know a lot about it.”
I laugh. “I watch a lot of rom-coms with your sister.”
He smiles and holds my gaze. “Well, I have no doubt you’ll find that kind of love, Em. Any guy would be lucky to have you.”
I break the eye contact, turning to spoon more ice cream. “Thank you.” I stare intently at my bowl that’s mostly melted now. Even as melty goo, it’s still the best ice cream I’ve ever had.
He begins picking at one of his nails. “Is thatyour idea of a perfect date? A fancy dinner and movies under a blanket fort?” He glances back up at me with a teasing smile.
“Not quite,” I answer seriously. “Dinner and a movie are overdone. I’d enjoy both of those things, but they’d have to be done separately.”
He nods. “Okay, then what is your idea of a perfect date?”
I think about it. I guess I had never really planned it. It’s not like I’ve had boys rushing to ask me out in school, or any place for that matter. I want to tell himthis is my perfect date. Today was amazing, spending time with Andrew, looking at books, and eating ice cream. This right now is everything I could ever ask for, but I can’t tell him that. I try to imagine myself on a date with another guy, my dream guy.What would I want to do?I can’t picture any scenario where the guy isn’t Andrew.Dang, my stupid heart!
I blow a wispy curl out of my face, buying time to come up with an answer. “First, we would get pizza together because I love pizza more than most things in life.” A knowing smile slowly spreads across his face. “Then, I don’t know. For aperfectfirst date, I guess there’d be some sort of gesture. It doesn’t need to be grand, but it needs to be something sweet and romantic that shows he put some thought into the date and knows me well enough to come up with something I’d enjoy.”
Andrew’s deep blue eyes meet mine, and I swear I see something in them. There’s a soft light like he’s happy in this moment, and maybe, just maybe, there’s a hint of something else behind those eyes.
Andrew checks the clock on his phone. “My mom should be here any minute. Let me call her to get an ETA.”
He steps off for a moment to talk on the phone, and I reflect on our conversation.Was it obvious I was talking about my feelings for him? No, because I don’t feel that way about Andrew. We are just friends. How do I interpret his response? Is that just Andrew being his sweet self, or is Andrew giving me a hint?
He returns and grabs my book bag. “Are you ready to go? She said she will meet us outside the bookstore in two minutes.”
I take the last bite of my ice cream and toss my bowl in the trash. “I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to leave this place.”
He laughs and slings an arm casually around my shoulder, walking us to meet his mom.
CHAPTER 11
Summer 19
“Emma!” Rebecca shrieks as she runs toward me for a hug.
She wraps me up when she reaches me. I’m filled with such happiness to be back with one of my people. How am I here with her right now? I’m in shock. Before I can process what is happening any further, I'm bombarded with questions.
“How’s collegiate running going, Emma? Are you showing everyone who’s boss? I’m sure you’re already traveling to the conference meet and regionals, just like you planned to. Are you still going to do the mud race this summer? I know I can’t do it with you anymore”—she laughs, as if her death is just a minor inconvenience—“but you should still do it.”
I sigh. “It won’t be the same if I do it alone.”
“Get my brother to do it with you! He needs something to do this summer, and you already know he said he’d do anything for you.” She wiggles her eyebrows. “Speaking of my brother, you guys need to figure your shit out. You guys were so close to getting together last summer. I may not have heard his side of the story, but don’t think for a second I didn’t notice how smiley he suddenly was too. Not to mention the fact that Andrew was pretty much holding your hand in the UTV. That’s right! I see everything.”
I shudder at the memory of that day. Some good things happened between Andrew and me, but those quickly became a moot point after the accident.
