“Thanks, Mom.” I nodded as if she could see me. “I appreciate you calling.”
The only living I’d been doing was working and the occasional date or girls’ night out with Jazz and Makayla. Well, and losing myself in a good book.
Escapism was my favorite pastime.
“Have a good day, sweetie. We’ll talk again soon. Love you.”
“Love you, too.” I ended the call. It was highly unlikely that we would speak again before next month… before the fifteenth.
I sat there in my small office feeling numb and overwhelmed. Memories of the procedure I had at only fifteen and on the fifteenth of the month and my brother’s death haunted me.
I didn’t deserve happiness after my brother had died because of me.
Now that I was older and wiser, what I’d gone through wasn’t as bad as what I’d made it out to be when I was a young teenager. Plenty of women had ectopic pregnancies. But how many had been young like me?
My mom had nearly lost her mind when the doctor in the emergency room had told her I was pregnant. It was a whole thing.
Mom had thought the pain I was experiencing was my appendix bursting. At the time, I was relieved Josh had spent spring break with our dad. Us kids would usually take turns so not to overwhelm our stepmom. Makayla had stayed home with me, but being three years younger than me, she didn’t know what was going on. Of course, I’d eventually confided in her.
If I’d been more confident and less shy, I would have told Chris the truth, but my life had spiraled out of control, and I hated myself and the universe for taking my brother from me.
Even now, I didn’t know if I could tell Chris. His best friend had died because of me.
I’d pushed Chris away because I couldn’t stand to be reminded of my part in my brother’s death but also Chris’s part for getting Josh into motorcycles and MCs.
Forcing myself out of the chair, I pulled myself together and exited my office.
Chris… Er, I meant Slay, and I would never be together. I just couldn’t after so much had happened between us.
And frankly, I didn’t care all that much about Alek either.
Cass’s Vibeswould be my one and only love.
6
Slay
Even in the middle of summer, San Francisco was cold and foggy. I didn’t care that it was almost noon and the fog would burn off soon. The crisp breeze made it feel like winter.
I shivered on the docks as we waited for Remo and Fabio. The brothers had picked the location, which was fine. They had a badass yacht I’d been on before. But of course, we couldn’t board it until they arrived and they were twenty minutes late.
“Fuck, it’s cold,” I muttered, crossing my arms over my chest. “Where the hell are they?”
“Fabio’s text said they were ten minutes out,” Jefe replied, showing no emotion. He stood like a marble pillar with his hands in his pockets. Silvia and baby Chance were probably occupying his mind. He didn’t show it, but I knew that leaving them hadn’t been easy.
“My nuts are getting numb,” Tequila said. “They’re not used to being out in the cold. A hot kitchen is where they’re most comfortable. Sweating in my shorts.”
I snorted. “That’s gross man. I don’t want to know you have sweaty balls while you’re making my food.”
“Did you bring any burritos? I’m hungry.” Our prospect, Corcoran rubbed his belly. “I’m on a strict eating schedule.Gotta keep these bullets fueled.” He pointed out his biceps and grinned.
“Those tiny golf balls don’t need much fuel, homey.” Tequila laughed and curled his arms to show off his muscles. “Not like mine.”
I shook my head and strolled along the harbor. A pissing match would start with those two if Remo and Fabio didn’t arrive soon.
I admired the blue water in the bay.
Cass would love it out here in South Beach Harbor with all the fancy yachts and sailboats. When we were going together in high school, I’d brought her to San Francisco once to see the seals sunbathing on Pier 39. She’d mentioned how she’d like to go boating sometime, and I’d told her I’d make it happen someday. And I still could if she’d give me the chance.
