I cleared my throat and tried not to get overly emotional. “We were happy,” I whispered. I shook off some of that sadness and smiled, “But you’re more materialistic than me.”
It was her turn to splash me in the face.“Am not!”
I pulled my arm back to splash her again when the patio lights blinked on and Emma and I were suddenly spotlighted in the middle of Ben’s pool. The patio door slid open and he walked outside, speaking in low tones to a gorgeous brunette with inhumanly long legs.
Humiliated and feeling obnoxiously frumpy, I made a squeaky sound and plummeted beneath the surface. Then I felt silly for trying to hide in the pool, which was obviously impossible, so I swam to the side and resurfaced.
“Liz?” Ben sounded incredibly surprised to find us in his pool.
“Hey, Ben.”My skin burned with embarrassment. “Sorry, we were, um, going for a dip.”
“I can see that.” The mild irritation in his tone could not be misinterpreted.
I swatted my sister’s thigh to push her into action. She had been momentarily speechless and just as embarrassed as me. We swam for the ladder and pulled ourselves from the water.
There was just no subtle way to get out of the pool. I felt Ben’s eyes on me the entire time and couldn’t help but feel like a teenager caught red-handed. Emma and I moved to our towels quickly, neither of us making eye contact with Ben or his date.
“Liz, you don’t have to go. You and your sister are welcome to stay and swim. We were just going to have a glass of wine. We can do that inside.”
I whirled around and looked at Ben in his black pants and pressed blue dress shirt, holding a bottle of wine and two stemmed glasses. A wave of irritation rolled through me. I shook it off and forced myself to feel embarrassment again. “No, I’m so sorry. I didn’t expect you to be home so early.” It was his date’s turn to blush. She took a step away from him and looked down at her pretty black stilettos. “I didn’t mean to say that you shouldn’t have come early. Or that you couldn’t come home early. I just, what I meant to say, was that I expected your date to last longer.” Oh, god. I slapped a hand over my eyes. “No, that’s not what I meant either. Obviously, your date is still going on. I… I… I’m going to stop talking now.”
“Probably for the best.”I could hear the grin in Ben’s voice so I refused to look at him.
“Hi, I’m Liz,” I said to his date instead. She probably hated me by now, but I felt the need to explain my presence. Hopefully that would help Ben regain whatever footing I’d caused him to lose. “I live next door.”
“Hi, Liz.I’m Megan.” She reached out politely to take my hand. The towel hung awkwardly in front of me and when Megan took her hand away it was wet from mine.
“I’m Emma,” my sister said brightly when she shook Megan’s hand next.
“Hi, Emma,” Ben greeted in his smooth tone.
“Hi, Ben,” my sister giggled adding to my humiliation even more.
The four of us stood there rocking on our heels for another minute and the tension was painful. I finally met Ben’s dark gaze and pressed my lips together to keep from cringing from the force of it. A slow smile spread across his full mouth and I knew I was forgiven, but I still felt bad about this small interruption to his date.
“Well, we’ll get going!” I announced in a rush. “Ben, I’m so sorry! I should have thought ahead.”
He shook off my apology with a jerk of his chin. “It’sfine, Liz. I’m the one that offered my pool. Use it any time.”
“Thanks.” I started walking backwards. “Thank you.” Emma moved with me. We were almost to the gate.
“I’ll see you tomorrow night?” he called after me.
What?I might have panicked when I replied, “I can’t tomorrow! We’ll talk. I’ll talk to you later.” Then I turned around and basically fled for my house.
Emma hurried to keep up with me. “Oh, god,” she groaned miserably. “That was so awkward!”
“I know!” I hissed. “I didn’t expect him to bring her home with him!”
Emma threw her head back and laughed. “That’s because you haven’t been on a second date in like fifteen years!”
“It hasn’t been fifteen years!”Only twelve.The difference between Ben Tyler and me punched me in the side and I lost my breath. He was on a second date and hoping to get lucky. I would never be in that position again. He was at the very beginning of his love life and I had watched mine wither and die. He was free to date whomever he wanted and I had buried the greatest love of my life.
I stumbled in the cool grass, nearly crippled by the weight of that realization. Emma was in the same place as Ben, but for some reason it had never bothered me when I thought about her dating life or future with a man.
Ben’s differences stood out painfully from mine. He spotlighted the finality of my husband’s death and the depressing loneliness I had to look forward to from now on.
Ben would eventually find a girl, maybe Megan, fall in love, get married and go on to live in blissful matrimony.
