“I’m not going to let him get to you again,” he swore. “He will not touch you unless you want him to. Yeah?”
I had a lifetime of fear compounded in my chest. Anxiety had been my constant companion long before I ever ran away. I knew what it was like to tremble because of another man’s mere presence. And yet, when Ryder made his promises and told me that Nix would not come near me unless I wanted him to… I believed him.
“Yeah.”
His full lips lifted in a soft smile. He watched me for several long moments waiting for me to back down or call him on the impossibility of Nix ever finding me, but when I didn’t his expression grew even more peaceful.
“Alright, let’s go meet my dad and then we’ll get as far away from this city as humanly possible.”
“Sounds good to me.”
Chapter Ten
We met his dad on the outside of town at a gas station near the airport. It was dark by the time we had driven back to Omaha and decided nobody had followed us.
The bright lights from inside the building spilled onto the pavement outside and lit up the lot with glaring intensity. The place was pretty busy. There was a constant stream of customers coming and going. Nobody paid attention to us in the darkened corner of the lot. They were all too preoccupied with the monotony of their own lives.
I watched them with a jealousy I couldn’t hide. I wanted that kind of simplicity. I wanted to be able to stand in the middle of a crowded place and tap away on my phone without worrying that someone would be magically attracted to me and try to take advantage of me or that someone would recognize me and report back to Nix and suddenly his army would swoop down on me and drag me away to the Underworld. I wanted out of my life and away from a Pantheon of gods that wanted to destroy me in one way or the other.
I wondered if Ryder was my way out. He was determined to come with me. I didn’t want him in any more trouble, but he was right. This was his decision. He was eighteen and could do as he pleased.
“He’s here,” Ryder announced.
I watched his dad pull next to us in a dated Subaru and ignored the nervous butterflies that took flight in my belly.
I was terrified to see his dad after all of this time. I couldn’t imagine Nate Sutton had much love for me after I nearly got his son killed and then abandoned him to save myself. Plus, I could only imagine what he thought after Ryder had been completely honest with him.
I wasn’t exactly the kind of girl a dad hoped his son would fall in love with.
Not that Ryder was still in love with me… In fact, I had no idea how Ryder felt about me, good or bad. We hadn’t spoken much since our kiss. He hadn’t explained why he had kissed me and I hadn’t tried to broach the conversation either. We filled up with gas again and grabbed some more fast food in silence. Once we got to this gas station the quiet had become such a strong part of our companionship I had started to believe it would never be broken.
Ryder and I were masters of denial. Denying our feelings for each other was nothing new for us.
It just felt worse this time around.
I wanted to know what he was thinking. I no longer had a heart to protect or a future to guard. Everything I had tried to do up until now had failed and I had been left with nothing but a husk of my former self.
And there wasn’t much there to begin with.
“How much does your dad hate me?” I whispered when Ryder made a move for his door handle.
He gave me an unreadable expression over his shoulder. “He doesn’t hate you.”
I rolled my eyes. “That’s impossible. Of course he hates me.”
“He doesn’t,” Ryder insisted. “Why would you think that?”
“I ruined your life. I left youin the hospital. I haven’t called or let you know that I was all right. Basically he has all of the same reasons to hate me that you do.”
“Do you think that I hate you?”
“Don’t you?” I held my breath while I waited for him to answer, even though I already knew what he was going to say. Of course, he hated me. How could he not?
“Ivy, I don’t hate you,” Ryder countered. “I’ve never hated you. I-”
A tap at the window ended Ryder’s confession. The breath I had been holding whooshed from my lungs and I nearly choked on the force of it.
Ryder didn’t hate me.
