“No, I suppose not,” I say, side-eyeing him.
“And as a bonus, my family doesn’t try to set me up, and you have an excuse to give Celena as to why you can’t be on those dating apps.”
“True,” I admit.
“It’s a win-win,” he says. “I mean, the only thing we’re really missing is sex.” He pauses. “And we don’t need to have sex, right?”
There it is. The topic we’ve been skirting around since this started.
I’m not some inexperienced teenager that I don’t catch the subtext of his question. He wants to know if I want to have sex.
The big question is why he wants to have it.
Occam’s Razor. The simplest explanation is that, since he’s fakedating me, he can’t date anyone else. If he can’t date anyone else, he can’t have sex with anyone else, so if he wants to have sex, it has to be with me.
Almost immediately I hear Celena’s voice in the back of my mind.That’s not the simplest explanation, you idiot. The simplest explanation is that he wants you.
I tamp down the voice. Nope. I still won’t let myself believe that.
A sound of disgust that sounds like Celena echoes in my mind.
“We don’tneedto,” I say, emphasizing the need part. “But we’re consenting adults, so we could if we wanted to.” I pause to look at Ash. I think he’s stopped breathing as he stares straight ahead at the road. “The question is whether or not that would be a good idea.”
His lips part enough to release the breath he’s been holding.
“For the sake of argument,” he says, “what’s the worst that could happen if we have sex?”
The worst? The condom could break, my IUD could fail, and I could get both pregnant and a venereal disease, for one. Not that I think Ash has an STD. He seems responsible enough to practice safe sex, but with my luck…
I don’t say any of that, of course, and Celena would slap me for living under my usual cloud of doom, but Ash asked for the worst. I opt for something a bit less dire when I speak, though.
I shrug. “If we’re…incompatible, it could make things uncomfortable for the next couple months,” I say. “And what would Mr. Kaladin do if he found out? He’s not paying me to sleep with you.”
Ash nods slowly. “And what’s the best that could happen?” he asks.
The best? My brain isn’t wired to think that way, but I try anyway.
Great sex.
A relationship.
Love.
Happily ever after…
Yeah, right. Keep dreaming, Gray.
Chapter 23
Ash
It’s the Monday after Thanksgiving, and Gray warned me this week is always crazy at the university. There are only a few weeks left in the semester, and everyone is rushing to write final papers or cram for exams, so Gray’s office hours are in high demand. She’s answering emails at all hours of the night, and one of her grad students is also defending her dissertation, so she’s helping with that as well.
I’ve just gotten to the arena and dropped my stuff at my locker for our game today when my phone rings. It’s the guard station at the administrative entrance.
I frown. I wasn’t expecting Gray today, but the guards have approval to let her in whenever she comes, so I’m not sure why they’d be calling me. Unless it’s a new guy who doesn’t know her yet?
“Hello?” I answer.
