I didn’t recognize the person she was describing, nor did I feel it in me. But as her words reverberated through my chest, one of the sentences really stood out.
“What kind of more are you talking about, Alivia?”
This was a fire.
A fire that had been roaring since the moment I had seen her in my kitchen.
A fire I didn’t want to put out.
She froze as she stared at me, but her eyes moved, from my left one to my right, back and forth, nonstop.
She was speaking without saying a single word.
“I … wasn’t referring tothat… but yes.That.” She gulped. “Fuck, I?—”
“Come here.”
“Walker …”
“Put your job out of your head, you’re not going to lose it, if that’s what you’re worried about.” I stretched my arm across the counter, opening up to her, my fingers stopping before they touched her. “But if you want me to kiss you, then you need to come here. Now.”
EIGHTEEN
Alivia
“Put your job out of your head, you’re not going to lose it, if that’s what you’re worried about. But if you want me to kiss you, then you need to come here. Now.”
His words were swirling around in my head, causing me to take a step toward him. But before our bodies slammed together, I placed my hand on his chest, remembering the muscles, the hardness, the grooves that were so well defined.
It had been too long since I’d touched him, and I missed the feel of him beneath my fingers.
I couldn’t say a word until I got my thoughts straight because I hadn’t anticipated this. Lex had told me he was obsessed with me. I wanted to believe her. Whenever I felt his eyes on me in the kitchen, or the way he’d stopped me from falling in the hallway, how his hands stayed on me longer than they needed to, how he’d stalked me online—those were all signs, proving that she was right.
But Walker had made it clear during our time in the hotelthat I shouldn’t have expectations. His life was complicated as fuck, as he’d put it, and he was stretched far too thin, left with very little time for anything other than work.
Had that changed?
Had he developed feelings?
Did he want the same thing as me?
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the only issue …
“Some people don’t like to let it all out, in fear that once those words are spoken, they can’t take them back.” He put his hand on top of mine, and I wanted to melt into it. “Let it out, Alivia. Say whatever you need to. But please just say something.”
“This is the part that doesn’t come easy for me. I keep everything in.”
Was that where the tightness in my chest had come from? Was that why my heart felt like I’d been running around the dining room rather than standing here, frozen?
“You don’t have to do that with me. You can be honest. You can say whatever is on your mind. I don’t care how ugly or beautiful those words are, just say them.”
I lifted my shoulders, the emotion pulling at me. “You want honesty? Here you go. If this job didn’t mean everything to me, I’d be throwing myself at you right now.”
He huffed, but the seriousness didn’t leave his expression. “I know you appreciate your position here.”
“You know, but you don’t know all of it. What I’ve told you is only some of it.” My stomach began to ache. “I don’t just want this job. Ineedthis job, Walker. And even though I want to put my lips on you, you’re my boss. You control my future here.” My hand went to my chest, trying to slow down my heart rate. “I can’t risk that. I can’t take the chance of losing this income. Because even with both jobs, it’s not enough.”
I wanted to be the type of person who didn’t think beforeshe acted. Who would jump into his arms and deal with the consequences after.
