When Simon's front door finally opens, I step back from the window.I listen for the car to start, then I grab the chicken casserole I've made and snatch up the basket with freshly made cinnamon buns.I couldn't sleep--haven't been able to for ages--so I got up in the middle of the night to bake.
I walk across the road, noting how there are no longer any leaves left on the trees.Everything is gray and depressing.I put the food on the doorstep as I've done every day since Simon told me to leave.
The world is muted.
Cold.
Lonely.
I turn around and walk back, but when I step inside, it is as if the walls are creeping in to crush me, so I grab a jacket, walk through the house, and out onto the patio at the back.The chair creaks when I sit.I most likely should've put it in the garage over winter to protect it from the elements, but I don't have the energy.
I slump and rest the back of my head against the top of the backrest.It's one of those chairs meant to have a seat cushion, so it's not comfortable to sit without one, but I don't care.
Nothing matters anymore.
I close my eyes and wait for the day to end.
I don't know how much time has passed when I hear soft footsteps.A couple of hours, maybe.I'm cold and stiff, but I don't care.
"Boris?"It's a whisper, and I crack my eyes open.Ira is standing on the grass next to the patio.He looks smaller than I remember.I've watched him every morning, so I know he hasn't shrunken, but right now he looks tiny.
"Hi, honey.How are you doing?"
He lifts one shoulder and lets it drop.I notice he doesn't have a jacket on."Hey, aren't you freezing?"
He meets my gaze."I couldn't bring a jacket.Dad would've noticed."
"Does he know you're here?"
He shakes his head."I climbed out the window of my room."
Fuck.I didn't want Simon to accuse me of kidnapping a child."Maybe we should return you then."I smile at him, though it's much harder to muster than it should be.
He shakes his head and steps up on the patio."Will you still help me with the cookies?"
"Of course."I straighten in my seat.Poor boy looks like he's freezing.I undo the zipper of my jacket and motion for him to come closer.He more or less runs to me and curls up on my lap.I huff a laugh and pull the jacket around us both.
He tucks his head under my jaw and melts.I rock him a little and breathe in his scent.My boy.
"Are the cookies on their way?"
He nods."They'll arrive tomorrow, then they need a day to sort them all, then Dad has to pick them up the day after tomorrow."
"Okay, we'll have to go on a road trip to Rutchester then.You have the order form, so we can see who ordered what, right?"
"I think so."
"Good.We'll figure it out."Hopefully, people will remember what they ordered.
Ira snuggles closer, and I hug him to my chest.We sit in silence for a long time.
"Why is Dad angry with you?"
I fill my lungs to the brink, then let the air out in a whoosh."He feels I wasn't being honest with him."
"Because of the wolves?"
Eh..."Yeah."
