I know Dad works at the sawmill but I don’t know what he does. He works in an office now, not on the floor like he used to. He also wears nicer shirts to work these days. He used to wear tan work pants and a bright green vest.
The bland office is cold since it’s really just a steel box at the front of the mill with a bathroom and a desk. Dad points to the empty corner with a fat finger and tells me, “Sit there and don’t cause trouble.”
It feels like I sit there forhours! He didn’t give me anything to do and there’s no TV in here. There’s a computer but Dad has to use it to work. The bottom of the computer screen says 11:56 am which means I would have been having lunch at school, right now.
I’m hungry.
I know this could get me in trouble but my hunger is stronger than my fear.
“Dad,” I ask timidly.
“What, Jason?” He doesn’t even turn around to look at me, just keeps typing on the keyboard.
“I’m hungry. It’s lunch time at school.”
He lifts his graying head to look at the clock on the bottom of the screen and huffs.
“Ok. Let me go to the employee lounge and see what I can find for you.” He spins in the office chair and narrows his eyes on me. “Stay put.”
I nod. I don’t want to get in trouble.
But he’s gone for so long!
I see the paper and pencil on his desk. The paper is blank so maybe I can draw on it. I start to draw a picture of a truck, it’s the one at the lodge I like so much. Dad said if I work hard enough it will be mine one day. It’s so cool. I can’t wait until I’m old enough to drive it. But Dad said it also needs to be fixed. I hope I can fix things like he does one day.
I look at his computer and the clock says 12:32. Mom says I’m really smart for my age since I can already tell time.
Dad has been gone for a while. Maybe he forgot about me. My tummy starts gurgling. I know he said to stay here but maybe I can find him and he’ll remember he was going to get me food.
The door knob turns easily into the cold October day. It’s cloudy and the mist mixes with the steam from the mill over the huge piles of logs that are as tall as buildings. I asked Dad if we can climb them and he said that’s dangerous.
It occurs to me I don’t know where the employee lounge is but it can’t be too hard to find. Trusting my instincts I take a right and start searching through the maze of lumber piles. There’s so much machinery and logs everywhere. And chips of wood mixed in the mud. I look down and see my boots are covered in mud too. I already know Dad is going to be mad about that. But it’s too late for that.
I weave through the mill trying to find a building. I’m sure an employee lounge would be in a building, right? The guys wouldn’t want to sit out in this rain everyday. And starting in October, it rainseveryday.I hate the rain. But I like the snow we get in December.
No matter how long I search I can’t find my dad. I can’t find anyone. I must be lost so I turn around trying to retrace my steps but everything looks the same. Thepyramids of lumber, the muddy ground, the clouds and mist block out the sun so even the sky looks the same. I don’t know where to go but I can’t stop moving.
It’s so cold too.
“Hey,” I hear a voice. For a second I think it’s Dad but Dad’s voice sounds deeper than this one. I turn to my left and see a guy in a yellow hard hat and a bright green vest like Dad used to wear. I recognize his black beard. His name is Bob. He sometimes comes over to the house to drink with Dad and watch football with a couple other guys from work.
“Hey, kid,” he beckons me over with a wave of his hand. He’s taller than Dad. It’s kind of scary. I feel like being that tall would be scary, like I might hit my head on things. “Where’s your dad?” He asks. “What are you doing here?”
“I can’t find him,” I answer. I’ve never talked to this man before. Even though he’s been at the house before, he didn’t talk to me. “Where’s the employee lounge? He said he would get me lunch.”
“Where did he leave you?” Bob aks.
“His office,” I tell him even though I’m worried he’ll tell on me. “I thought he forgot about me. He was gone for a long time.”
“Is that so?” Bob gets a weird look in his eyes. I don’t like it. I don’t like him. He’s weird. He looks mean. He makes me nervous.
“I’m going to go find my dad.”
A meaty hand grabs my shoulder and jerks me back. I don’t like it. I don’t like it. His touch hurt my shoulder. Why did he have to hold me so hard?
“Hold on, kid, I’ll help you.”
A soft voice coaxes me from my nightmare.
