“I’ll find you, I should be there in fifteen minutes. It’s going to be okay, all of it. Just hang tight and I’ll be right there.” I nodded to no one as the call had ended.
I rested my head on the steering wheel and sobbed. I was sad and terrified. I had never felt so ill that I couldn’t make a phone call. I shivered as my face heated up; fifteen minutes sounded like an eternity now. Dr. Stephens had said I needed to come in right away if I had a high fever. My head ached as my mind spun. What if I was at the point of no return? Lupus was checking off a list—joints, check; lungs, check; kidneys, check. I pictured an electronic grid, and all the systems shutting down.
My breathing was short and heavy as my hands continued to shake. Was I dying? Was I going to make it until Natalie got here? I made one last attempt to make a call. Through my hazy vision, I searched for Evan’s number. If this was it, or the beginning ofit, I didn’t want to die with him thinking I’d thrown him away. I would say I love you and hang up. It rang twice before the phone dropped out of my hands.
In the game of life, the final score was lupus 1, Paige 0.
Thirty-Six
Evan
Fillingin for a couple of missing workers had seemed like a good idea to get my mind off Paige for the afternoon. I didn’t realize my phone battery was low and had died about an hour after I’d arrived at the job. I plugged my phone into the car charger once I was back in my truck and headed home. It took forever to turn back on, but chirped as I pulled into a spot in front of my apartment. My stomach sank when I saw a missed call from Paige.
I was still so fucking angry. She’d lied to me and didn’t think it was a big deal. I was surprised to hear from her again. My phone was spotty with notifications, the call had come in hours ago with no voicemail. I called her cell and her house phone. No answer. My stomach dropped when I saw four missed calls from Ellie over the course of the last two hours.
I stepped out of the truck and noticed Ellie walking up the block towards the front of my building. She ran to me when I screamed her name. Something was very wrong.
“Shit, Evan. I’ve been trying to get you for hours.” Ellie panted to catch her breath.
“I was at a job and my phone died. What’s going on? Is it Paige?”
“Paige is in the hospital. She called Natalie from her car around two o’clock because she was too weak and dizzy to drive. She was on Colden Avenue, right by your office.”
My eyes bugged out of my head. “Hospital? Why didn’t she call me? She had just left, I would have run right over.”
Ellie let out a long sigh and shook her head.
“She told me she came to see you, and it didn’t go well. Did she tell you everything?”
“She started to. I had to leave to cover at a job. She admitted she’s been lying to me all these months. She told me she has lupus, but she didn’t have a chance go into detail. And she sure as hell didn’t tell me she was sick enough to have to go into the hospital. What the hell is going on, Ellie?”
Ellie took a deep breath and shook her head. “Lupus is a very serious autoimmune disease that causes a lot of complications. My aunt has had it for years. Paige has known since her first appointment with the rheumatologist.”
“Yeah, she lied. Why?” I white knuckled the handle of my truck while I waited for Ellie’s answer.
“That is something she’ll have to tell you herself. I know you’re angry, Evan. We all are, she lied to everyone. But she needs you now. When I left the hospital they were transferring her to the ICU. She has pneumonia again, and is having trouble breathing.” Ellie ran her fingers through her short hair while her eyes filled with tears. “It’s so sad, Evan. She’s so weak. Before I came here she was crying for you in her sleep.”
I slammed the roof of my truck. Between the rage, the frustration, and the maddening helplessness, I was ready to blow.
“She never had to cry for me! I never would have left her side if I’d known. She’s all I want, all I’veeverwanted!”
I lowered my head as I contemplated what I should do. I’d spent all day angry as hell that she had lied to me, but now I was terrified. As mad as I still was, Paige was my heart and soul; she always would be.
I’d had enough. It was time to get my girl back.
“Can you drive me to the hospital? I’m a little shaken. I’m afraid I’ll do ninety to get there.” The side of Ellie’s mouth turned up in a small smile as she nodded and motioned with her hand to follow her. We jogged over to her car in silence and quickly got in.
“What did she say, Ellie?” I asked as I gazed out the side window. Looking ahead at the snarl of traffic would only make my leg bob even more. I needed to get to Paige.
“When?”
“When she cried for me. What did she say?” Ellie gave me a teary smile.
“She asked you to sing to her.” Ellie bit her lip and swallowed as she turned her eyes back to the road.
I shut my eyes tight and tried to hold it together. She had to come back to me. There was no other option.
Thirty-Seven
