I shrugged. “I honestly don’t know, but I’ll try. That’s all I can do.” My crying finally slowed down, and Jack kissed my forehead before he let me go.
“Since you’re feeling better, how about coming home with us to see the baby. Your mother keeps urging him to reach his next milestone. Soon he’ll be getting a job and moving out.” I shook my head. That sounded like my mother, all right.
“Okay, let’s go.” I turned to Evan, then back to Jack. “Give me a minute?”
Jack nodded and squeezed my shoulder before he made his way outside with Ellie.
I buried my head in Evan’s chest as he rubbed my back.
“I handled that well, didn’t I? No wonder my entire family still treats me like a kid.”
Evan grabbed my shoulders and pushed me backward to meet his gaze.
“You handled it the way anyone else would have. If you weren’t upset, I’d be worried about you—well, even more than I usually am.” Evan smirked and I shook my head.
“He’s always been there, from the beginning. Through every bad boyfriend, flunked test, and evil friend who turned on me. I think of what life will be like without him, and I already feel so alone.” My voice cracked again.
Evan shook his head and pulled me close again. “You will never be alone. It’s you and me against the world. You’re my heart and my soul. That means you can never get rid of me. Ever. Understand?” He cocked an eyebrow at me.
I chuckled. “I expect you to run for the hills, not me.” I wrapped my arms around his waist and nuzzled into his neck. “You’re a hot as hell ex-hockey player with a panty-dropping voice. I’m staying put for as long as you’ll have me.”
Evan’s chest shook from laughter as he held me tighter. “And you are the beautiful girl I crushed on who grew up to be the gorgeous woman I fell in love with. Looks like we’re both stuck, right?”
I nodded. “See you at Jack’s later?” My tears had exhausted me but I found the energy to give Evan a smile.
He cradled my head in his hands and pressed his lips to mine. “Where you go, I go.” He kissed me again and I trudged out the door to meet Jack and Ellie.
So I would do it. Pretend everything was normal and okay and give my cousin my best in the last months of his life. The one thing I knew I couldn’t do was prep myself for losing Jack. No matter when I had to say good-bye, it would be one of the worst days of my life.
Twenty
Paige
By the time Christmas came,I still felt like shit most days. I had days of almost no energy and the cough got so bad I needed an inhaler. There was no rhyme or reason to it. I’d feel great one day, then could barely get out of bed the next. Once I started getting random fevers at night, Evan begged me to please see another doctor. Natalie gave me the name of a doctor she liked and trusted at the hospital she worked in as a nurse, so the day before Christmas Eve I had close to ten vials of blood drawn. I was tested for everything, and Dr. Ramirez said she hoped to finally have an answer for me after the holidays.
Iwasworried, and frustrated as all hell that I still didn’t feel close to my normal self, but my thoughts were mostly of Jack, Ellie, and my aunt and uncle. It was tough to enjoy the last Christmas with someone we loved when weknewit was their last Christmas. My cheeks hurt from the happy face I forced. We all agreed this Christmas was a blessing and to focus on that. I mentally took bets as to who would break down first. My money was on me.
“Are you okay, Daisy?” Evan wrapped his arms around me from behind as I was in the kitchen cutting up cheese to put on a tray. Other than an upset stomach from nerves, I felt decent today, and thought the best thing to do was to keep moving and try to not sit still. After a few seconds I would start to think, and that would do me no good tonight.
“Yeah.” I sighed and rubbed the back of Evan’s hand as it rested on my waist. “I’m really trying not to be sad tonight, so I might need a little more alcohol to do that.” Evan chuckled and turned me around.
“I know it’s early but I thought maybe this would help keep a smile on your face.” Evan reached behind him and pulled out a Tiffany’s bag. I gasped at the beautiful pale blue color and white ribbon.
“Oh, my god! Tiffany’s? Are you crazy?” Evan laughed and shook his head.
“I’m crazy aboutyou, so just open it.” I grabbed the bag as he dangled it from his index finger. Even the white tissue paper seemed high end; I tore at it and found the Tiffany’s key pendant that I’d always wanted. I had gotten a knockoff one day from a street vendor in Manhattan, but could never justify buying the real one for myself. I held the pendant in my hand, and let my fingers run along the chain.
“Now you can stop wearing the fake one. I don’t know if you remember but I was with you when you got it. It was the day we went into the city with Jack to pick out Ellie’s engagement ring. You spotted that guy selling it and jumped up and down that it was the Tiffany’s necklace you wanted. I told you it wasn’t real, and you laughed and said it was a great placeholder until you got the real thing.”
“That’s right. How could I forget that?” I couldn’t believe Evan remembered that day almost four years ago.
“So, I thought it was time you got the real thing.” Evan took my face in his hands and smiled. I reached up to clasp the backs of his hands.
“I never thought I could love anyone as much as I love you. I know it’s. . . tough right now for all of us. But you make me so fucking happy.” Evan ran his thumb along my bottom lip and rested his forehead against mine.
Until Evan,everythingin my life was a placeholder. I finally had the real thing, and I never wanted to let go. This Christmas, my big wish, the one that I’d had since I was a little girl watching princess movies, had come true. Even though I’d spent way too much time looking in all the wrong places, my prince really did exist.
“You make me happy, too. God, Evan…I love you so much.” I jumped on Evan and kissed him much harder than I should have with most of my family in the next room. He moaned into my mouth as he lifted me up and put me on the counter. I pushed the tray of food aside as I wrapped my legs around his waist. I nibbled on his bottom lip when he tried to pull away.
