“It’s okay, babe. I’m usually at the office Saturday mornings, anyway. Have fun with your friend.” He looked between us before he kissed my cheek and strode back to the couch, hardly saying another peep for the rest of the evening.
When Josh and I were together, the rest of the world faded away. I never had a reason to care about leaving anyone out—until now.
Brianna ~ Past
“JOSH?” I KNOCKEDon his open screen door before I pressed on the rusty handle to enter. Sneaking into Josh’s house was impossible as the shrill creak from the hinge drifted down the street to my house.
The inside was barren, as usual. His living room looked like someonealmostlived there, like a no-frills hotel room between guest visits; a TV, cable box, and faded plaid couch were surrounded by barren walls. It always made me sad that no one hung up a school picture of Josh. His mom left before I even met him, and his dad wasn’t a sentimental guy by any means. He spoke in grumbles and nods, giving his son enough to live on—barely—but Josh never liked to talk about him. He would close off whenever I’d ask.
“Hey, Bri.” I craned my head to a familiar voice behind me.
“Hey, Reid! Any clue as to why Josh invited usbothhere today?” Reid cocked an eyebrow as he peered around the room.
“Your guess is as good as mine. Maybe he’ll enlighten us as to where he’s spending his afternoons.”
Reid snickered, but his eyes gave away his concern. He was Josh’s other best friend, although Josh always assured me I was number one.
“Ah, there you are! Finally! Come on in, guys! I have a pre-Thanksgiving feast for my two best friends.” Josh beamed at both of us, and as per usual, any prior concern or coherent thought flew out of my head. That smile, those eyes. I was borderline obsessed, but too much of a chickenshit to do anything about it.
I gave Reid a side glance when I noticed the spread on Josh’s table. Pizza, wings, three different kinds of soda, and a plate lined with pre-wrapped chocolate cupcakes made for an interesting combination.
“Why do I feel like I’m at the Peanuts Thanksgiving? You got toast and popcorn cooking, too?” Reid nudged Josh with his elbow before reaching for a slice of pizza.
Josh laughed and shoved his shoulder. “Just eat, asshole.”
This wasn’t exactly a king’s feast, but this was the first time I saw anything but store brand cereal in this house. Most nights, Josh ate with me and my parents, but he hadn’t been over in two weeks. When I asked why, he said he had “stuff to do” and didn’t text me until after eleven every night. He was somewhere, with someone, but I never pressed. We were best friends, not boyfriend and girlfriend, so I had no claim or right to ask.
“I only have time for one slice. I got a job at Target for the holidays and need to get shit ready for Black Friday.” Reid took big bites and chewed quickly. “You should apply. All they want are warm bodies that can lift and move.” He lifted his arm to make a muscle and squeezed his bicep with his other hand. “I bet they’d still take scrawny ones like you.”
Josh laughed and shook his head. “Thanks, but I already have something. I’ve been helping Gio out.”
Reid stopped mid-chew and sat back in his seat. “Shit, man. Have you lost your mind getting in with that crew? His brother isn’t even allowed near school grounds anymore. Tell me you aren’t dealing.”
“I’m not,” Josh clipped. “No one is paying me money in exchange for anything. I’m delivering; that’s all.”
Reid threw his napkin and glowered across the table. “Calling it by a different name doesn’t mean shit. They catch you, they could throw you out of school. What happened to keeping your head down and moving out after graduation?”
“I still can!” Josh’s face was red as he met Reid’s glare. “It’s just weed. I pass along a couple of dime bags at school, make some nighttime deliveries, I get a few hundred per week. Stop making it a bigger deal than it is.”
My stomach churned as I looked between them. A burning flared in my throat, but I couldn’t let myself cry. Reid was one hundred percent right. No good could ever come from doing any favors for Gio or any of the guys he hung out with. Delivering was the same as dealing. That’s why he was never around at night. While I felt a sliver of relief he wasn’t with a girl, a brick of dread weighed heavily in my gut.
“It probably starts that way. You’re smarter than this, Falco. At least, I thought you were,” Reid huffed, before he pushed his chair away from the table. “I need to get to work. Thanks for the pizza.” He threw his paper plate in the trash and stalked toward the door, not gazing back at either one of us. He stilled before he crossed the threshold and craned his head. “Be careful, man. That’s all I’m gonna say. Happy Thanksgiving, Brianna.”
The door slammed hard after Reid’s exit. I wrung my hands in my lap, my skin prickling from Josh’s stare. I thought of Gio and his brother, the stories I’d heard around school—the rumors of gang affiliations and worse. Episodes of my dad’s favorite crime shows raced through my mind, how all the drug-themed ones ended up with someone getting shot. But that wasn’t real life; just pretend, right? My Josh wouldn’t get hurt. Hecouldn’tget hurt. My hands shook as I set them back on the table. I inhaled a shaky breath as I finally met his gaze.
His emerald eyes were glassy. A sad smile ghosted his mouth as he motioned to the plate of cupcakes with his chin. “I bought those for you. You don’t even want one?” he whispered as he reached over and placed one of the wrapped cupcakes in front of me. “You didn’t have any pizza yet, but that’s all you really want, right?” I could only nod, terrified that any attempt to use my voice would end up with me a crying, blubbering mess.
He heaved a long sigh as he rose from the table and crouched next to my chair, taking my hand in both of his and giving it a squeeze. “Please don’t worry about this. I know what I’m doing. And I need something more than just a few hours after school at minimum wage.” His eyes darted from mine and fell on our hands. We were always touchy friends. We kissed on the cheek, hugged more than we probably should have, even as little kids. This blurry line of affection wasn’t an issue with my girlfriends. Not that I had more than a couple. Josh was all I needed, and that was why I never told him how I really felt. If he didn’t feel the same way and it became awkward between us, I was terrified I’d lose him.
“Dad isn’t doing so well. Workman’s comp isn’t covering much. I used the money from Gio to pay the electric bill. I had a little extra, so I thought I’d . . .” He trailed off as he motioned toward the table.
Josh’s father was severely injured when a ceiling beam fell and struck him in the head. He spent most of his days at home now, dizzy and even crankier since he was unable to work. I wasn’t sure where he was today and honestly didn’t care. I should’ve felt sorry for him, but I couldn’t. Instead of calling Josh’s Uncle Billy for help, now he was letting his teenage son provide for him. Even though he was never much of a father, I couldn’t believe he’d put this burden on Josh.
“I get why Reid is pissed off. Are you mad at me, too?”
I drew in a long breath through my nose. “Not mad, just worried. Josh, Reid is right. Those guys are trouble. Please promise me you’ll stop if it gets too dangerous.”
Josh looked away and nodded. “I promise, Bri.”
