“You should come with us,” Reyna adds in. “We can protect and care for you in a way that the wolves won’t be equipped to.”
I tug at my hair, feeling like my sanity’s slowly slipping away from me. I don’t know what to do right now or where to turn to, and frankly, I can see that I’m not in the right mindset to make any decisions. Before deciding my next steps, I need tocalm down, and calming down requires getting away from this castle and into nature. Forests and mountains are a second home to me; they ground me and have always helped me calm even in the most difficult circumstances.
“Not right now,” I mumble. “I can’tthink straightright now. I need…time. Time to figure out what to do.”
Odelia reaches out and places a hand on my arm. “That’s perfectly understandable; you’ve just gotten quite the shock. How about this: we’ll leave you with a sigil and spell that, when drawn in blood on a mirror, turns the mirror into a portal directly to our coven house. Take whatever time you need, and if you decide to leave this place, know that you have a safe haven with us. We’d never leave one of our own without the proper support.”
Even though I feel like I’m spinning out, I still have the presence of mind to ask, “Will the spell work with the wards I’ve put up around the castle?”
Odelia nods. “Yes. As long as you’re the one to draw the sigil and say the spell, yes. Should you feel you need to get away from here, use it. You and your sister will be safe with us.”
Struck with a new thought, I ask, “Who else could’ve known about my pregnancy?”
“Every person in this castle,” Reyna replies. “Shifters have an excellent sense of smell; they’d have known you conceived within two days.”
Which means the betrayals are on all fronts, and the blows just keep coming. I thought Wyatt was better than his brother; clearly, I was dead fucking wrong about that too. Any sentiment of kindness I might have been feeling for him, any acceptance of him in Leisel’s life, simply evaporates. Once again, my mother’s words haunt me:all shifters are monsters. How right she was, only I was too swept up in royal life and the possibility of making a better world to see it.
I give my head a shake. I need to get out of here and into nature so I canthinkand figure out exactly what I’m goingto do. Right now, rational thought eludes me; I feel like I’m being pulled in a million different directions, and my heart feels like it’s breaking.
I force myself to say, “Thank you for your visit and offer of help. While I think about what to do, is there anything else I should know about this…pregnancy?”
“The biggest issue witches generally experience is fluctuation in magical abilities,” Claire says. “Dips and surges in power are very common—at times you might find it impossible to call on your magic, but at other times you’ll have surges that can make your powers burst forward without being summoned. The best way to avoid that is to keep yourself calm; stress and anxiety are triggers to both surges and reductions.”
Considering I’m in a place that has already proven to be stressful, and will probably grow even more so, it seems likely I’ll struggle especially with the magical aspect of pregnancy. Yet another thing I’ll need to consider.
Odelia, sensing that I need my space, nods. “Of course, if you need us, you know how to get to us. Until then…I look forward to the next time we meet, Sierra. It’s truly been a pleasure.”
Chapter Forty-Three
By some miracle, I manage to act semi-normal as I join Camden and Wyatt to escort the witches out of the castle, exchanging final pleasantries before watching them open a magical portal and disappear. I just might do the same…but not yet, not before I’ve thought everything through properly. We gave the witches a brief tour of the palace before seeing them off and I used the opportunity to stash the spell Odelia wrote down for me in my room, so I have a way out should I choose to use it.
Standing in the courtyard under the bright sun, I stare at the castle grounds stretching in front of me. On the far left, I see a tree line that leads into the forest surrounding the castle, which is where I need to be right now.
Camden curves an arm around my waist, pulling me close to him. I barely manage to hide my flinch, and it’s a struggle not to shove him away and yell at him, but I’m not ready to talk about the information I just received yet. I can’t hash this out now. I’m not in the right frame of mind. Camden has earned himself quite the shouting match, but I need to be in peak mental condition for that, not discombobulated and frazzled to the extreme.
I force a smile onto my lips as I look up at him, my eyes locking with his icy ones. I gave this man a certain amount of trust along with mybody, and he used it to all but destroy me. How can I live with that, withhim, knowing his deceit?
Camden’s brows furrow as he looks over me. “What’s wrong? I can feel your turmoil through the bond. I have been for the last little while but didn’t want to say anything in front of the witches.”
Fuck. I hadn’t considered that the bond is a two-way street; we both get slivers of each other’s emotions. I don’t want him to get a whiff of something being off or put together the fact that I found out about his sordid plan prematurely—not until I’ve decided whether I’m staying here or taking asylum with the witches.What to say that’ll throw him off my trail?
Thinking on the spot, I tell him, “I’m okay. We just…ended up talking about my parents a bit, which tends to put me in a bad mood. I think I’m going to take a walk, enjoy the fresh air, and clear my mind.”
Camden reaches out to tuck a few strands of hair behind my ear. “I’ll come with you.”
No. No, that’ll defeat the entire point of getting away from him and into my natural element so I can do some serious thinking about my future.
“I’d like to be alone for a while,” I say.
Camden looks like he’ll protest further, but Wyatt interrupts. “Come on, Cam. Let your mate have her space. She’s safe here, no harm can befall her.”
Yes, I am safe within the confines of the wards I put up—safe from any outsiders, but not safe from those who live in the castle. Presently, the inhabitants within the shield are the greatest threat to me, which is why I need to get out of it, at least for a little while. The wards don’textend to the forest, but it’s broad daylight, and I know castle guards are patrolling the woods; I doubt any harm can come to me there.
Camden’s hand flexes on my waist, and he stares at me for several long moments with furrowed brows. Finally, he releases me. “Nightfall’s in about two hours—be back before then and stay in the protected land within the shield.”
“Of course,” I say simply, with no intention of actually following his instructions. Considering the magnitude of his deceit, I don’t feel bad whatsoever having some lies of my own.
Looking reluctant, Camden gives me a single nod and releases me. Wyatt claps his brother on the shoulder and says, “Come on, we should get the ball rolling to uphold our end of the treaty.”
