And then he’s gone, and I relax against the cushion and close my eyes. The silent room and the tranquility in the air lull me to a half-sleeping state.
“Here’s your phone,” he says, dragging me back to consciousness—or disturbing my fragile sleep.
I try to move to a sitting position, fighting the relaxed state I’m in and the non-cooperation of my body, but his hand on my shoulder takes the fight away from me. His touch, like magic, sends waves of peace from that point through my body.
“Thank you.” But I’m not even sure if I say it out loud or only think it.
Just as I’m not sure if I imagine his hand caressing my hair…
I must have…
CHAPTER 7
Haden
Ilove this time of the day, when the shop is still closed and silence is my only companion. No loud voices, no music, and no requests, just me and this place I now call home.
There was a time when I wasn’t alone, when Henry was still here. He was always talking, explaining every single move he made, every line, and every tool, until they became second nature. I remember how everything was new, and how I’d pretend not to like it, but instead I was drinking in every one of his words as if they were water.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I quickly pull it out. A message from my phone provider about new exciting features I should have to stay connected with friends and family.
I don’t need these kinds of texts to show me how alone I am.
This is exactly what I want.Being alone means no suffering from losing what you love, what you hold dear.
I don’t really want to work, but this will help me stay away from the guest I have upstairs, who I’m unable to leave alone if last night is any indication. Also, I couldn’t cancel these appointments, because one customer spends a lot of money here, and loves to brag about his tattoos and my shop. The other one is a newby, and I’m afraid he’ll never get one if I cancel. He was already stressed when he booked the appointment. After these sessions, I’ll be free for a couple of weeks to get used to being a parent.
Me, aparent.
The word sounds all wrong, especially referring to me.
I look up again, and my mind travels to the man upstairs. What the fuck am I doing? I have enough problems without bringing home a stray kid. Without getting attached to a stranger. And I offered for him to stay even longer… What was I thinking?
I thread my hand through my hair, as if that could save me from myself and the need I have to make sure he’s fine.
My gaze drops to the phone, and I’m moving even before my mind can formulate the thought. How could I have left him on the sofa alone? It’ll be too painful for him to get up without injuring himself more.
I take the stairs two at the time, and when I’m finally upstairs my breath sounds like a kettle on a stove.
I enter the apartment, trying not to make too much noise, so I don’t disturb him if he’s sleeping. Jay is there, lying on the sofa, and just like last night I’m captivated by him. His chest is rising and falling with his breath, his lean frame looking so small on my oversized sofa, and his black and blue face sends tendrils of rage through my body.
I should have punched that fucker last night, harder and without mercy… And I should have kept punching him until he was in the same state Jay is in now.
I walk to his room to pick up the phone, and then come back out. I stop next to the sofa, crouch, and lean in to whisper in his ear, “Here’s your phone.” I place it next to the cushions he’s resting his head on.
He moves, trying to sit up, but I’m not even sure he opens his eyes.
I place a hand on his shoulder and he settles back down. His trust makes a little crack in the wall I’ve built around myself.
I release him after a moment, and I’m ready to stand up when a ray of light lands on his hair. Those curls sparkle under the sun, and my hand moves of its own accord to check if they’re as soft as they look.
Have I ever touched anything so silky?
He relaxes even more under my touch, making that crack a bit longer.
I’m aware I should remove my hand and go back to work, but I’m rooted to the spot. I’m not sure if there’s something wrong with me or if there’s something in Jay making me crazy, but I’m not acting like myself at all.
Just like last night…
