Squeezing my eyes closed, I lowered my forehead to hers and held her like I was afraid she’d slip right through my fingers. “Please.”
At her silence, I peeled my eyes open to find her own gaze darting all over my face. “Please what?”
Fuck if I knew. I wasn’t even sure what I was begging for in that moment. Maybe it meantplease don’t leave me. Orplease don’t give up on me.Evenplease help me get past all this shit in my head so I don’t fuck up the best thing that’s ever happened to me.
But when I opened my mouth, all I could get out was, “Please, Chaos. I need you. Right now.”
“What...” Her throat worked on a swallow, and I couldn’t help but trace my thumb down the column of her delicate neck. “What about Zach?”
“I don’t care about Zach.”
I realized my mistake almost immediately, when her eyes flared and the green glittering with something that looked a lot like hope.
“I mean, he thinks I’m in the bathroom. He doesn’t have a clue I’m in here.”
Lennix
I feltmy face fall at his response. My lips, that had slowly begun to tip into a smile, fell as my heart dropped out of my chest. It was my own fault for reading too much into that short sentence. I should have known better, but his explanation still managed to hurt like fucking hell. He said he wanted to try, but as the weeks passed, I couldn’t shake the feeling he would have been happy tokeep doing what we were doing forever. Sneaking around, lying to our friends, and only showing affection when there was no one around to witness it. I worried that was his version oftrying, and that it was all I’d ever get.
I don’t know what I’d been hoping to hear, but at the desperation in his voice, I knew there was no way I could say no. I was terrified I’d never be able to say no to him. That was the problem. Because the longer we did this, the more I was starting to realize it wasn’t working for me. Stupidly, I’d allowed myself to fall too deep. I’d promised this man one day at a time, but each day I fell more in love with him.
It was the way he touched me. The way he looked at me. The way he made me feel treasured and special. Every moment we were together, it felt soreal. I couldn’t understand why he’d always been so against relationships, because from where I was standing, he excelled at them.
I tried to take a step back but his arms tightened around me like steel bands, refusing to let me budge an inch. “Rayla?—”
“Let me touch you.” He might have worded it as a demand, but from the way his expression twisted and his fingers dug into my hips, I heard it as the desperate plea it was. And I would have been lying if I said his words hadn’t lit a fire inside me, causing arousal to flood between my thighs.
“I need to touch you.” He whispered against my skin, knowing where to kiss and caress to set me off like a firework. “I need to kiss you and feel you wrapped around my cock.”
I couldn’t ignore the heaviness in my breasts or the pressure building low in my belly. We’d been going at it like rabbits for a month now, and the craving I had for him hadn’t lessened in the slightest. All he had to do was walk into the room, and my stomach was full of bees. When he looked at me, I lit up from the inside.
I was starting to think this man was it for me. The One with a capital T and O. And that scared the hell out of me, because I didn’t know if he felt the same.
But I wouldn’t let myself fall down that black hole. I couldn’t, because I needed him as much as he needed me. I shoved all those unpleasant thoughts back into the steel reinforced box in the back of my mind and locked them up so I could be in the here and now... with him. One day at a time.
It was impossible for me to keep any of the boundaries I tried so desperately to put in place to protect my heart. The damn thing was out there in the open, waiting to be crushed.
“Raylan,” I said quietly, reaching up to place my palm against his cheek. He pressed deeper into my touch, appearing almost pained. “Fuck me.”
His eyes flew open, and before I could say another word, he was on me. Grabbing my ass, he hauled me off my feet and moved me backward before depositing me on the corner of my desk. We’d done this more times than I could count, tearing at each other’s clothes like we couldn’t get to the other’s skin fast enough, but this felt different.
There was something deeper to the way he was touching me. There was an aggression that had never been there before. He was in such a rush to get me naked that his hand shook and he practically tore my panties in half. He thrust into me so fast, so hard I had to clamp a hand over my mouth to muffle the shout I couldn’t hold in. He was just sobig, my body still needed time to adjust to his size, only he didn’t give it to me this time. It was as though he was trying to burrow beneath my skin.
“Fuck,” he clipped as he pulled out to the very tip before slamming back in. “Fuck, Lennix. You’re so goddamn perfect. Never been like this.”
I felt my own release barreling up on me and knew it was going to be more intense than ever before. It hit me before Icould prepare, coming so hard the edges of my vision started to close in and stars burst behind my eyelids. Raylan kept thrusting inside me through it, never slowing down as he sealed my lips with his and swallowed down every sound I made. If no one heard us from out in the hallway, it would be a miracle.
Every muscle in my body felt like jelly once my orgasm finally finished, and I felt dangerously lightheaded. Raylan eased me back so I was lying on the desk as he continued to fuck me like his life depended on it.
“Jesus, Chaos. Can’t get enough. Never get enough of you.”
I felt him swelling inside me, growing even harder, and I knew exactly what was about to happen, but instead of coming inside me like he always did, he braced one hand on my hip, holding me in place as he pulled out and wrapped his fist around his cock.
“What are you—?” My words cut off at the sight of him jacking himself harder than I ever would have dared.
“Marking you,” he grunted, his hand moving up and down his length at lightning speed. “I’m marking you as mine the only way I can. Just in case you have any ideas to the contrary. Always.Fucking. Mine.” Then he came, his release shooting out across my skin and coating my belly and breasts as he grunted and groaned.
It took a solid minute for us to both come down. And once he had, Raylan smiled that crooked, dimple-popping smile. “You look so beautiful like this,” he said reverently.
