“Then why?” I asked, my heart racing with so many emotions I couldn’t tell which was which anymore.
He clenched his jaw and sighed, walking over to his dresser and trailing his finger across the chain of Luna Raya’s mate necklace he had in his room. “I wanted you to feel the same way I felt when I found out you were my mate. I wanted it to be real for you, as real as it was for me. I didn’t want you to feel like you had to love me just because I was your alpha and said that I was your mate. I hate those people who do that.”
He shook his hand and clenched his fist with the chain in it. “I wanted you to feel everything for me naturally instead of it being forced. I wanted to wait until you turned eighteen to have sex with you because I wanted it to be special for both of us, but you made that damn hard each night.” His jaw twitched. “You know how many fucking nights I just wanted to tell you so I could finally have you as my own…” He became quiet. “And now you know we’re mates and you’re leaving me.” He turned around, finally, and I saw the tears in his eyes. Unfallen, but still prominent.
I stepped toward him, not knowing what to say or what to do at the moment, but he stepped back. And I felt rejected.
“You’re leaving me,” he said quietly, like he had fully understood it now, his lips trembling.
“Roman,” I said, my voice cracking.
He held out his hand and gave me the necklace, not bothering to put it on me like mates always did with each other. Mom had gushed so many times about when Dad put her necklace around her neck, how she would never forget that moment.
But I wouldn’t get my special moment.
My special moment was ruined the minute Roman assigned me as a nurse.
“Put it on me,” I said. Desperate. So fucking desperate.
He paused for a long moment, the moonlight bouncing off of his skin. His eyes flashed back and forth between gold and green. Then he finally took a deep breath and said, “I can’t.”
After another moment, he turned around and placed his hands on the dresser, taking a deep breath, the muscles in his back tensing. “You should leave, Isabella.”
No. No, I couldn’t leave. Not without him marking me. Not without him putting on my necklace. Not without my mate.
“You want me to leave?” I whispered. Everything hurt. My body. My heart. My wolf.
I pressed my lips together so hard to muffle a sob. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. This wasn’t how I wanted my eighteenth birthday to end. This wasn’t how I pictured meeting my mate.
This wasn’t a fairytale; this was a nightmare.
“Yes,” he said. His response was short and quick, like he didn’t need to think about it.
I clutched the necklace in my hand, holding onto it for dear life. Beside the sketch, it was the only thing I had from Roman.
I gathered my belongings, my dress, my bra, my single ounce of dignity, and walked to the door. Yet he didn’t make eye contact with me. It was like I was an ugly monster to him.
After grabbing the doorknob, I turned to face him. There was one question that I needed answered before I left. The question that my wolf had been begging me to ask since we found out he was our mate. I gazed down at Luna Raya’s necklace, rubbing the pendant between my thumb and index finger.
I already knew the answer, but I needed to hear it from him.
“Will you mark me, Roman?”
Moon Goddess, I wanted him to say yes. I needed him to mark me to prove that he still loved me despite my decision, that he wouldn’t get with someone else just because he was angry at me, that I was his and he was mine.
The mating process required it. Sex without a mark or a mark without sex… If one happened and not the other, the she-wolf usually went into heat within the next month. And I didn’t want to go into heat without him next to me.
Every single emotion faded from his face, and he stared at me like he stared at the rogue that killed his mother. “No.”
Chapter 33
Roman
Fuck.
I grabbed my journal and hurled it across my office at the wall, anger pulsing through my veins. It hit with a thud, then landed on the ground. Everything about this situation was fucked up. I grasped the notebook and tore out each sketch of her. One by one. Until my floor was littered with pictures of my mate.
Fuck.
