I take two steps closer. Her body goes instantly rigid.
“You’re my wife,” I murmur, my voice low. “It’s my responsibility to take care of your needs.”
She stares at me.
“Whether it’s related to your work or your body.”
She narrows her eyes. “No need to take care of my body. I can take very good care of myself.”
I take two more steps closer. “I could prove that I can take even better care of your…” My eyes roam over her full breasts, slim waist, and down her milky thighs. “…beautiful body.” I lift my gaze back to her flushed face.
“I don’t want you to.”
I sigh, exhaling through my mouth. “That’s very unfortunate for you.” I grin. “But I’m just one call away if you change your mind in the near future.”
She purses her lips. I lift my hand, she goes completely rigid. I glide my fingertips along her soft cheek. “I want to keep my promise of not touching you, but it’s very difficult. When you come in front of me, all I can think about are ways of fucking you.”
I let my hand fall and shove both hands into the pockets of my sweatpants. “Like right now, I want to spread you open on…” I point with my chin toward her table. “That table. I checked itssturdiness because the same thought came to me while having this lab prepared.”
Her cheeks burn bright red. “How can you speak such nonsense with such seriousness? You’re hopeless, Matleon,” she grits, walking around me and out of the room.
I smile. Now she’ll think about it next time she comes here. Words have a powerful effect, and I enjoy wielding that power.
I’m perfect at mind games, but the moment illogical things like feelings come into the picture, I usually stop enjoying it. She is an exception. With her, I enjoy the entire spectrum of feeling itself. Last night wasn’t entirely enjoyable, but it was a much-needed experience for me. I’m not the type for heart-to-heart talks. I can do brain-to-brain conversations, fist-to-face conversations, but not heart-to-heart. I don’t like peering inside my own heart, I prefer dissecting others’ emotions so I can use them against them. My own emotions? I keep them locked away.
It’s not that I don’t feel. I feel everything perfectly, I’m not Zo. I understand emotions with precision, but only when they belong to others. When it comes to my own, I like the canvas blank. If I can’t see something, I don’t act on it. If I don’t feel the guilt of killing someone, I don’t react to it.
But yesterday, I forced myself to confront that blank canvas. I saw inside myself thatI need her, not just her body, but her presence, close to me in every way.When I saw her tears falling, I didn’t shut off the other end; I let her pain hit me square on the chest. And when she said she would never love me, I let the hurt consume me completely.
Looking into my own emotional space isn’t pleasant, but around her, it’s necessary. I think I can work on it.
Iselyn
I watch the golden drops fall one by one from the cloth-lined filtration funnel. It will take ten more minutes for the complete extract to filter out. More than enough time for my mind to wander toward Matleon.
When my hands are busy with work, my brain doesn’t have space to think about him, but the moment I get even a little breathing room, all my thoughts fly straight to him. And last night… last night was more than enough material for my mind to dwell on.
The sound of the door opening pulls me from my thoughts. Wen rushes inside, her face tight with worry. I frown. “What happened?”
“Someone leaked it to the media—Avira is Alexander Bennett’s biological daughter.”
“Shit.” I rush toward her, and we both sprint outside. This morning, Zo announced he’s going to marry Avi. Outside our circle, no one knows about Avi, Wen, or me. We’ve been kept hidden from the world our entire lives. Avi is a published, world-famous author under her pen name Ash Penny, and Wen is a deeply talented pianist, known only by her stage name Ella. As for me, no one knows anything about me. And now, this leak is going to cause a whole lot of shit.
We run to Zo’s mansion. Sounds echo from Zo’s study, its doors wide open. Inside, Avi is a crying mess.
He looks up as we enter. I pull my phone from my shorts pocket and step outside while Wen moves toward them. I make a call to Matleon, he picks up instantly.
“Did you see the news?” I ask.
“What news?”
“Someone leaked the information that Avi is Alexander Bennett’s daughter.”
“Fuck.” He mutters under his breath. “I’m coming.”
His voice turns distant as he speaks to someone else. “We’ll have this meeting next Monday.”
The call cuts. I walk back inside the study.
