The effect is instant, like being thrown into an ice lake after soaking in a hot spring. All the lingering warmth, all the heat on my skin, freezes over. I push him aside and sit up abruptly.
He reaches for me, but I slap his hand away.
“This was nothing,” I say, meeting his eyes steadily. “It was just physical. It doesn’t change what I feel for you. Please don’t think I want to attach my emotions to you again just because you made me come.”
He frowns. “It’s not about whether I made you come or not.” He grabs my chin and tilts my face toward his. “I don’t want to keep it just physical. I want you to love me because I—”
I chuckle bitterly. “So now you want me to love you.” My eyes burn. “Don’t you think I’d be pathetic to love the man who called me desperate, who stomped over my heart like it was garbage?”
Tears spill from my eyes. Old wounds rip open, raw and bleeding again, and I hate that it’s happening in front of him. I hate that he gets to see this.
He cups my cheek, his touch trembling. “I was a jerk, Angel. And I regret it so fucking much. I want to take those words back, but I can’t. They’re already out there. All I can do now is beg for your forgiveness.”
His thumb brushes my skin. “I’ll do everything you say. I’ll spend my whole life correcting that mistake. Just give me the chance. Please, Iselyn.”
I stare into his dark eyes, searching, weighing, hurting. “Fine,” I say quietly. “I’ll give you another chance, if you divorce me.”
His fingers shake against my cheek. “You forced me into this marriage,” I continue, my voice steady even as my chest aches. “If you truly regretted your past actions, you would have askedfor my forgiveness before forcing me into this. You would have given me the freedom to choose if you really cared about me.”
My gaze hardens. “But you don’t, Matleon.”
He shakes his head. “I forced you into this marriage because I fucking need you as mine. I can’t do anything with you living an ocean away from me. I need you in front of me—as mine—so no one else can take you away.”
His voice hardens, desperation bleeding through it. “What power would I have had if you chose to fall for some other asshole? I would’ve done nothing.” A bitter breath leaves him. “Sorry, Angel, but I can’t do this one thing.”
He drops his hand from my face and stands. I rise too, my legs unsteady but my resolve firm.
“Nothing will ever work between us, Matleon.” My voice doesn’t shake, even if my heart does. “You’re a man I could never love, partly because of what you did, and partly because of the kind of man you are.”
His face shutters, turning into a mask of pure hurt. I ignore the sharp pang in my chest, turn away, and start walking.
chapter 24
Matleon
My eyes open at their usual hour. She’s lying with her back pressed to my chest, my body curved around hers, spooning her in sleep.
I hadn’t understood the full extent of her hurt before. I had estimated it, assumed I grasped it. But last night, I saw it clearly. I’ve caused damage so deep I don’t even know if it can be repaired. Still, I won’t stop trying. I’ll keep trying until the day I die.
I press a kiss to the back of her head. She stirs against me. I slowly remove my arm from around her stomach. She turns onto her back and looks up at me. It takes me only a few seconds to realize it—how much I love this moment, how much I wait for it.Her shining ocean-blue eyes meeting mine every morning.
“Good morning, Angel.”
She nods, then looks away.
I get out of bed. “Come with me. I have something to show you.”
She raises a brow. I chuckle. “I wanted to show you last night, but you decided to play run, run.”
A soft tint of red blooms across her skin. She climbs out of bed and follows me without a word. I lead her toward my studyand open the door beside it. Her mouth falls open as she takes in the sight. I had recreated her laboratory here, an exact replica, down to the smallest detail.
She walks around slowly, taking it in, touching nothing at first, just looking. When she finally turns to me, her eyes search my face.
“Who told you all these details?”
“Your father.”
A ghost of a smile touches her lips as she nods. “Thank you.”
