‘Mmm, but it’s not the same, is it? I’m hoping to persuade Mum to let me go, too. I might wrangle it. I thought I was grounded because of Granny, but I have a secret suspicion that Mum now thinks I might have done her a favour, and she’ll be able to oust a crippled Granny out of the big house.’
‘Tasha, that’s an awful thing to say about your mother.’
‘True, but I’m under no illusions. No point burying your head in the sand, as Granny says. Something to do with ostrich, I think. Comes from Pliny. Have you read any Pliny?’
‘No.’
‘Me neither. He’s on my list.’
‘You are an extraordinary girl.’
‘Geeky, you mean.’
‘No! I mean extraordinary, amazing, beautiful, funny, wonderful, so full of potential.’
Tasha blushed and swished her hair across her face.
‘I’m none of those things.’
‘You are all of them and so much more. I hope one day you realise it.’
‘If I’m allowed to go tomorrow, will you come as well? I know you’re not going to be here for much longer and I’m going to miss you.’
‘I’ll miss you, too.’
‘So, you’ll think about it?’
‘Yes, I’ll think about it.’
‘What is there to think about?’ Carrie asked as they walked along the beach. ‘Just come and enjoy yourself. Guy and I are going. I would have asked you, but wasn’t sure if the numbers were restricted.’
‘I’m worried it will be sending out the wrong message.’
‘And what message is that?’
Jules looked out to sea. A boat was passing by. She wondered where it was going, where Gavin was now. If he was trying to manoeuvre his way into another gullible woman’s heart and con her out of her savings. As soon as she got back to Manchester, she was going to try to put a stop to that.
‘That I’m available.’
‘Well, you are, aren’t you?’ Carrie said, skimming a stone across the water. ‘If you want to be.’
‘I’m not sure I want to risk getting close to anyone again, especially so soon.’
Carrie sighed.
‘Not every good-looking man is a potential partner.’
‘Is that what I’ve been doing? Weighing all men up as to their suitability?’
‘I don’t know. Is it?’
Jules sifted absentmindedly through the stones beneath her fingers looking for a fossil of some sort.
There were meant to be thousands, tens of thousands, of them on this beach, but to be honest she didn’t really know what she was looking for. She could pick up a piece of fossilized bone or wood and not have a clue that it was anything special. Subconsciously, was she assessing each single man as to his suitability as a husband, a father even if her biological clocksuddenly started ticking, someone she could spend the rest of her life with? Goodness, that sounded desperate, like someone who was looking for another person to complete them, which was a heavy burden for anyone to bear.
‘What I’ve learnt,’ Carrie said, ‘since you packed me off here, is that you have to accept that you are good enough as you are. And if you don’t feel that you are, then you have to do something about it, but gently, slowly.’
‘You don’t think that other people can make you a better version of yourself?’
