“See you in a week, little man.”
My head rests on the wood of her door. Do I knock and spend the night with her or do I go home and spend the night chasing away my demons alone?
She will be sleeping. She will be lost inside her head. Do I wanna interrupt that? Is Hannah right? Can I do this with her? She’s different. She’s calm. She’s quiet. She’s not hard like the women need to be inside the club. But fuck me, I wanna just sink in bed with her inside my arms and get lost inside the scent of her. She keeps the want for drugs away. She is a new addiction, and my body is shaking for it.
I feel the place inside my chest that once had a heart that beat so fast that I thought I’d die. It’s not quite back to beating like that, but it’s getting there. She made it happen. So why am I questioning spending the night here with her? Why am I worried that she won’t open the door to a dead man starting to feel alive again?
She, this little bird, was silent when I met her. Silent and beautiful. She is still silent now in many ways as words were not needed with her. She suffered in silence. She grew in silence. She was re-born in silence. So, it’s only fitting that it’s silence that now greets me. Taking the steps, I head out to the front of her shop and climb up the emergency exit ladder to her open window. Fuck, this woman, I told her to lock up as there is a fucking stalker of an ex on her ass and she’s up there alone with the damn window open.
Slipping inside her room, her body still wrapped inside the overstuffed comforter on her bed. She’s so fucking stunning that it makes my eyes shed the warm intrusion of tears. A reminder that I am human.
I send a text to West.
Me- Yo, brother, while I’m on the road will you watch Jade, and her flower shop? Don’t ever leave her. You and a prospect take it in turns got it.
A few minutes go by before my phone vibrates in my hand.
West- You got it, brother.
Me- I mean it, West. She is precious cargo and if anything, fucking happens to her it will be your balls I take out and feast on first.
Instantly I get a reply.
West- You got it.
Locking my phone, I slip it in my jean pocket and walk slowly over to my sleeping beauty.
Taking in a deep breath I pull my tired weak body from my clothes. kick off my boots and slip into the warmth of Jade and her presence.
How could anyone hurt her like he did. My fingers trace the scars over her face and neck all the way over her collar bone. She murmurs in her sleep and moves slightly at my touch. Changing to just a feather light touch of my fingertips I follow the line of marks… a road map of abuse that no woman should ever have had to endure.
I take a deep breath in as my hand falls to the one on her stomach, where he tried to cut her baby from her belly. The home of a mother. The safe place where it was meant to grow and be safe. Her voice startles me slightly.
“When I close my eyes, he’s all I see.” My heart stills as I struggle to breath.
“Then, baby, keep them pretty eyes on me,” I whisper as she turns into me. Her lids flicker open, stealing more than my breath from me. She steals my heart in this moment and I know I will throw it all down for her. I’d lose me for her to be able to walk free.
“I wanna disappear so nobody can hear me scream,” She breathes into the dark space between us.
“They say that pain is just an illusion, this is just a bruise, that’s just a scar. Your fine but no, 81, I am not. I am human and it hurts. I need a hand and I hate that I’m weak and he destroyed me. Now you’re here tearing my shield apart, 81, and I can’t fall in love with something that isn’t mine to love.”
She pushes the words out so fast my brain is still listening to what she's saying when she stops. Her stunning amber eyes are dancing with black flecks looking back at me, stealing all sense of time and space from me along with the ability to speak.
“Little bird, black and white creates emotions that colors never can. Inside the dark you find true colors. We all have secrets that are consuming. But, baby, I promise here, right now, inside this bed in the dark of your room, with just the broken breathing between us, that I will fucking love you as much as I humanly can. I can’t do golden rings, baby, but I can, I can give you this promise and my property patch.”
“I don’t need promises, 81. I just need to know you won’t destroy me like she did to you. I see it still walking inside your eyes. There is only so much pain I can take in one lifetime and I’ve had my own dangerous dose.”
“I’m damaged as fuck, little bird, but inside your arms I feel as though I have a grip on the monsters inside my head.”
“I’ll never hurt you the same way I’ve been hurt.” Her breath is hot on my flesh. Closing my eyes, I just breath her in.
“I gotta go tomorrow on a run and I don’t know when I’ll be back,” I say to her kissing her forehead. She snuggles deeper down into me and it makes me feel like I am worth her and this feeling.
“I’ll be here when you get back,” that small sentence means more to me than any of the promises Hannah had ever made. I know that Jades are laced in truth, not lies. Hannah, the minute my bike had left the compound she would have been heading to her dealer’s place.
“You will be safe though, right? Like you’re not going to get shot or some strange biker shit like that?” I can’t help but laugh at her and how naive she is to my world.
“I can’t promise there won’t be guns fired, little bird. I’m a biker after all,” I say into her as her hips roll forward and my cock grows at the small movement.
