But damn it, he couldn’t say the words.
“What is it?” Liam wiped sweaty strands of hair out of his eyes. He kissed Nathan’s cheek.
“I like being here. With you.”
They lay down together on the bed, Nathan spooned by the man who had vanquished fire-breathing dragons and scaled sky-high walls to reach his heart. But as he drifted off to sleep, he thought about how quickly it could all be ripped away in a second. Love could flip to disdain like a light switch. Mariel cherished two of her children and cast away the third. Four words—I am Mariel’s son—and then he might be abandoned all over again by the man who held him tight. Just like his mom had done. Just like his dad and family had discarded him.
Nathan threaded his fingers with Liam’s and hoped an answer came to him while he slept.
Chapter 25
Nathan
There was nothing innately pleasurable about shoveling hay, but the next day, Nathan couldn’t stop smiling to himself as he scraped it off the floor of the new pen. He could feel Liam’s arms around him in bed, their lips touching softly over the table at the restaurant last night. The memories had not dimmed since he woke up; they’d only gotten stronger. Even the sheep around him could see the dopey smile drawn in permanent marker.
Liam exited the shed with his own special glow on his face. Nathan watched him walk over to the pen, his broad shoulders moving under his flannel shirt.
“I’m going to make a supply run in town. Do we need anything?” Liam showed him the list he’d made.
“You forgot lube,” Nathan said.
“I get that shipped here.” Liam blushed. “It’s less conspicuous.”
“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I doubt we’re the only farmhands stocking up.”
Liam cocked an eyebrow and raised his lips in an amused grin. He massaged Nathan’s back and kissed him goodbye where his neck met his shoulder.
“Be back soon.”
Liam got in his truck and drove off, leaving Nathan alone with nature. He paid attention to the peaceful sounds of the farm, the bleating and crunching and steady breezes. He could hear himself think, which was something he’d specifically avoided back in London. Maybe country life could be for him.
His heart somersaulted in his chest when he heard the sound of Liam’s truck pulling up to the shed about fifteen minutes later. That was a fast trip. But when Nathan left the pen, he realized it wasn’t a truck he heard.
Pastor Fry looked at Nathan through his windshield. He got out of the car, his tall frame making Nathan feel shrimp-like.
“Hiya, Pastor. Y’alright?”
“Gidday, Nathan.” He didn’t shake Nathan’s hand. Probably because of all the muck on it, Nathan thought.
“Are you looking for Liam? He just ran into town.”
Pastor Fry surveyed the farm, taking in the sheep roaming around and the hoof house. His stare was impenetrable, making Nathan even more nervous.
Nathan wanted to keep talking, wanted to keep having this technically family time. But conversation was a two-way street.
“It’s a nice farm he has. He seems to be happy,” Pastor Fry said.
“It’s hard work, but he loves it. We both do.”
“A posh gentleman like you?” Pastor Fry looked him up and down. Anyone back home would be shocked to see Nathan in dirt-covered jeans and T-shirt. “You must miss London.”
“Not as much as I thought.”
“When do you go back?” The breeze that swept through didn’t shake Pastor Fry’s silver hair one bit. He seemed like a grandfather who gave bad Christmas gifts.
“I, uh…I’m still working that out. My visa is for nine months.”
“Nine months.” Pastor Fry smiled to himself. “Just enough time for anyone to find themselves in a heap of trouble.”
