Vítor
I loved Mateus and Luís,but if they turned up at the house one more time with the excuse that they wanted a recipe, use the pool, pick up some books, or any such random reasons, I was going to murder them.
Mateus had found me asleep on the sofa three days after I'd been back. He'd thought I'd been drinking and had passed out. I couldn't really blame him for thinking that because I'd still been in the same clothes I'd arrived in and the coffee table was full of cups, plates full of toast crumbs, and a few beer and wine bottles.
He'd made me get up and have a shower, then he'd cooked me a proper meal and made me tell him what had happened.
As a child, Mateus had asked why he didn't have any grandparents like the other kids at school. We hadn't kept it a secret that Dri's parents had died before he was born, and I didn't have a relationship with mine.
When he was questioning his bisexuality as a teenager, we always talked openly about the challenges of being LGBT, but also expressed that we would always support him no matter what. At the time, I didn't tell him what had happened to me because I thought he was too young to hear it, and I didn't want him to think bad things happened to all LGBT people.
He was an adult now, so I had told him everything, and then I'd told him about Tiago. He hadn't asked any questions or tried to convince me I was wrong or too hasty leaving Lisbon. There was no need because I was already doing that to myself.
Two days later, Luís had asked if he could come over for dinner, which was unusual because no one could ever get him out of his studio on a school night. I realized very shortly that Mateus had spoken to him when he hadn't even questioned my strong feelings for Tiago.
"Vítor, you were always very easy to love and loved very easily," he'd said, "that's why we became friends even after Rodrigo stole you from me that night."
"And look what that got me. A dead husband and a whole load of heartache."
"That's because you're focusing on the hurt of the past instead of fighting for the future."
"Aren't you full of wisdom tonight," I'd said.
Despite the jokes, what Luís had said stuck with me, but two weeks later, I was still working from home and considering what to do. Bernardo had been extremely supportive when I'd told him I had a family emergency and needed to be in Porto, but I did have meetings I needed to attend, so I'd gone as far as packing my bags and dropping them by the door.
The apartment in Lisbon was still technically mine, although I didn't know if Tiago had gone back to his old place. Part of me wished he was still there and part of me wished he wasn't. I'd come to the realization that I was irrevocably in love with Tiago, which made it all the harder because as hurt as I was with what he'd done, my heart was starting to understand the reasons behind it. I would have to come to a decision about the future soon.
The postman had already been by, so I was surprised when the bell rang since Mateus had a key and Luís was out of town this weekend. When I looked at the screen that was connected to the small camera by the gate, I was surprised to see David's face. I pressed the remote control to open the gate and then opened the front door.
David came barreling in, walking past me toward the living room. I didn't have a chance to speak before he went off.
"I know what happened to you was terrible and shouldn't have happened, but you don't know the other side of the story. You don't know how much my uncle hurt when you ran away. You don't know what it did to him, to our family. Not to mention Tiago. Do you know when he was last in a relationship? Never. You know why? No, I guess you don't know that, either. Do you think he gives his heart up for just anyone?"
He let out an angry cry and sat on the sofa with his head in his hands, then he was quiet until I heard his quiet sobs.
"David," I said, sitting on the other side of the sofa.
He wiped the tears from his face. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. It was unfair, and I just…"
"Why are you here?"
"Because they're all hurting, and I don't know how to help them. It's like they went back to how it was before, except it's worse."
I took a deep breath. It was time for me to start acting like the older adult I was. If I ended up being the one that got hurt, so be it. I still had my son and my best friend.
"David, let's start from the beginning."
I repeated the same story I'd shared with Tiago and Mateus, and I had to admit that the more I told it, the easier it was to remember that it was all in the past. Had my injuries not required hospital treatment, I would have had to endure years of abuse from my father, I wouldn't have met Julia and Dri, and I wouldn't have my son. As I retold the story to David, it was the first time in my life that I saw the positives that came from such an ugly event.
"No," David said, "Uncle Mário went to see you in hospital, but you were gone. He searched for you everywhere he could think, but he never found you. They cut ties with your father after that. I think he died not long after, and your mom a couple of years later. I don't remember her."
I was in shock. My brother had done the right thing after all. Even though I wasn't around, he'd still stuck up for me against our father.
"Where's your cousin?"
"I don't have any cousins."
"Teresa was pregnant when it all happened. I was going to be an uncle."
