"But I don't understand how that could happen," she said. "I've only met Lord Harbury once. And yes, we got along well, but he couldn't possibly have decided that he wished to marry me based solely on that interaction!"
"Well, I don't know what to tell you," James said. "He has decided that. He approached me in the club today and let me know that his intention is to propose marriage."
"And you gave your permission for that?" Victoria asked.
"Well, it's as you said, isn't it? I told you that the choice would be yours. I'm not going to deny someone permission to ask you—especially not someone you seemed to get along with so well. I think you would have been angry with me if I had done that—but you can tell me if I have that wrong. You wouldn't have wanted me to deny him permission to propose to you, would you?"
"I…" Victoria frowned. What could she say? Everything he was saying was right. Shehadinsisted on having the right to choose her own husband. Why was it that she now felt betrayed by the fact that James was allowing someone to propose to her? This was what she had wanted, wasn't it?
She supposed she'd grown to count on the fact that hewouldn'twant it. She had gotten used to his jealousy, to the fact that every time he thought someone was interested in her, he would getupset about it. Now here he was, telling her that a proposal was coming as though it made no difference to him at all. As if it was nothing more than an everyday occurrence, and he didn't care whether she said yes or no to the offer.
"I thought you didn't like Lord Harbury," she said weakly.
"Well, it doesn't matter if I like him or not. I'm not the one he wants to marry, am I? The important thing is whether or not you like him—and we know that you do, right? The two of you got along so well at that dinner party. I can't imagine that you wouldn't be happy with this turn of events."
"I don't want to marry Lord Harbury," Victoria said.
"I can't see why not. You told me yourself that you thought he was a good man. That you enjoyed his company. What is it you want in a husband that he doesn't have? He's wealthy enough to provide for you, if that's what you're concerned about."
"That's not what I'm concerned about. I just don't understand how this can be happening so quickly. It's coming out of nowhere." Her heart was pounding, and she couldn't help feeling as if she was engaged in a fight for her very life. She hadn't felt as if James was her adversary since the day he'd arrived here. She had warmed up to him so much more quickly than she had ever expected to. And lately, she had even begun to feel as if the two of them were friends.
Friends—or something more.
It was dizzying to see him turning on her now, to see that the kiss they'd shared had so clearly meant nothing to him. It was hard to believe that he could so easily allow her to consider marriage to someone else, especially when he had been so obvious in his jealousy every time she had so much as spoken to a gentleman before now.
What had happened? What was different?
There had to be something she wasn't seeing in all this. Something she had failed to understand. She took a deep breath to steady her nerves. "James, listen," she said. "I'm not in a hurry to marry. I don't mind waiting a while. We don't need to rush this, to force a marriage with the first gentleman who asks. I don't know if you solicited his interest or something…"
"I didn't. It's like I told you—he approached me. You saw how interested he was in you at that dinner party, so I don't know how you can be surprised by this. I think you must have known it was coming."
"I didn't! We didn't speak about anything like this at dinner. I didn't know he was interested in marriage at all, much less to me. How could I have known? And I was never interested in marriage to him, I promise you that."
"You don't have to convince me. This has nothing to do with me. This affair is between the two of you."
"Well, I'm going to tell him no, of course," Victoria said. Perhaps James was behaving like this because he was fearful that shewould choose someone else over him. Maybe he was pulling away from her now that she was on the verge of receiving another offer because he didn't know how she would respond, and because he didn't want to get hurt. She thought that if their places had been reversed, she might have done the same thing, and that it was understandable.
But James shook his head. "You should accept his proposal," he said. "It's a good offer. It's one of the best you're likely to get, and you should say yes to it."
"I don't understand," she said. "You didn't even like him. How can you tell me now that his offer is a good one? You really think that I should take it?"
"That's right. I really think so," he said.
She shook her head. "I don't believe you," she told him. "I think you're lying. I just don't know why."
"Why would I be lying to you? I've told you from the beginning that the goal is to find you a good marriage. That's been my focus all along."
"That's not what you were focusing on when you kissed me," she snapped. "Don't speak to me as if I'm ignorant, because I'm not. I know there was something behind that kiss. You feel something for me."
"That kiss was an error in judgment, nothing more. I should never have done it, and I certainly won't do it again," he said. "But it would be a grievous mistake indeed if you allowed that slip of sensibility to prevent you from accepting a good marriage. You should say yes to Lord Harbury. Do not pass up on a good offer because you're distracted by some frivolous thing that occurred between the two of us."
"How can you call it frivolous?" She felt sick to her stomach. "It wasn't like that. I was there. It meant something. I know it did."
"You don't have enough experience in the world to evaluate these things," he said.
"I don't see how you can say that. You know what experiences I've had. I've confided in you." She had told him the truth about Jonathan, for heaven's sake, and that was a story she hardly shared with anyone at all. To think that he could have heard that and still chosen to believe she was so unworldly that she would fail to understand the meaning of a kiss…to think that he could have heard that story and chosen to bestow a meaningless kiss, knowing what she had been through…
Victoria didn't believe any of it. He was lying, and she knew it. The only thing she didn't know waswhy.
