“If you don’t want to see me anymore—if you want to see him instead—you should say so. That’s all. I won’t waste your time, and you won’t waste mine. Let’s be honest with one another. Do you have feelings for Lord Kentrow?”
“No,” she said. “I told you that I didn’t, and that was the truth, Your Grace. He’s a good man, but he’s nothing to me.”
Allan took a deep breath in.
“Good,” he said. “That’s what I hoped you would say.”
“What do you?—”
But he didn’t allow her to finish. The temptation had become too great.
He took her wrist and pulled her into his arms so that their bodies were flush against one another, and he kissed her.
CHAPTER 19
It was the first time Edwina had ever experienced anything like this, and for a moment, she was lost in the kiss. She knew, in the back of her mind, that they shouldn’t be doing this, but she didn’t want it to stop. The strength of his hands on her back and the taste of his lips were intoxicating. There was no one here, no one to see them or stop them, and she felt like indulging in the moment as long as she possibly could.
And then reality caught up with her.
She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t allow herself to give in to him like this. It was exactly what he had wanted from her and exactly what he had warned her was going to happen, and she couldn’t let him be right.
She stepped back quickly, putting several feet of space between the two of them.
Her face was hot, her breathing erratic. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him. She was afraid that all her secrets would be written clearly on her face. Surely, if she looked at him, he would be able to see the effect he had had on her.
She didn’t dare to raise her eyes.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “Perhaps I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Perhaps you shouldn’t have?Perhaps?”
“I didn’t mean to offend you, or to overstep,” he said. “I apologize. I thought…” He paused. “I don’t know what I thought.”
“You thought I would welcome that,” she said. “You thought I would like it.”
“I think youdidlike it.”
Her eyes widened at his audacity, but she couldn’t bring herself to disagree—he was right. Still, she was angry that he’d been bold enough to say it. “It’s the same arrogance you have always shown,” she said. “No matter what I say, you remain convinced that you are going to make me admire you. You probably thought I would discover that I reallywantedto be kissed by you once you did it. Is that right?”
She was sure it was right. Of course, that was what he had thought.
The trouble was that she wasn’t sure he was wrong. Even now, through her anger and embarrassment, she was aware of the fact that shehadenjoyed that kiss. If it were to happen again, she wasn’t sure she would be able to pull away this time.
She took a deep breath and forced herself to remain calm. There was nothing to be gained by shouting at him, and she knew it. The better thing to do would be to make her feelings clear in a calm manner.
And she knew what it was she needed to say.
“We need to put an end to this,” she said.
“You want to end this walk? For me to take you back home?”
“Yes,” she said. “But that’s not what I meant. I want more than that. I want our dates to be at an end, Your Grace. I don’t want us to see one another anymore. I know that you paid for more dates, and you’re entitled to those—I’ll speak to my family. I’ll see to it that your money is returned to you.”
“Don’t bother yourself with that,” he said. “I don’t care about the money. I gave it to your sister’s charity, and I’m certainly not about to try to claim it back from that cause. Besides, I have plenty of money. I won’t suffer from having lost that amount.”
“Very well,” Edwina agreed. “I’m glad that’s not a matter of concern for you. But I don’t think you and I should see each other again.”
She expected him to argue, to tell her that he deserved his remaining dates and that he expected her to see them through.
