But he was quiet for a long moment, and when he spoke, it was with a dejected, resigned tone.
“You’re right,” he said. “It’s probably for the best that we end things now.”
It was enough to make her look up at him—she hadn’t expected that he would give in so easily.
The expression on his face was unfamiliar to her. The usual teasing smile was gone. The warm eyes had gone cold. It didn’t seem as if he was angry—anger would have involved heat. He was justdistant. She could hardly believe that this was the same man who had just kissed her so passionately. Now, he seemed to hardly care about her at all.
But that only confirmed that she had made the right decision. She had suspected that he’d never cared about her—he had as good as told her that he had only been using her to attract the duchess he sought. Now, his feelings were confirmed. All it had taken was her telling him that she didn’t think they ought to see each other anymore, and he had been ready to give it up.
“You think I’m right?” she asked.
“Things went too far today,” he said. “You’re right that this shouldn’t have happened. I owe you an apology—and I shouldalso keep my distance from you from now on. We’ve proven that we aren’t able to trust ourselves around one another, and the last thing I want to do is ruin your reputation or break your trust. If you think the best thing for us to do is to distance ourselves from one another, all I can say is that you’re probably quite right, and I support that decision.”
Even though it was what Edwina had wanted—what she still wanted—she hadn’t expected to get her way quite so easily.
Perhaps she should have expected it. The one thing he had always said to her, consistently, was that he didn’t want to marry her. She didn’t doubt the truth of that. This was only a ploy to help him find the duchess he dreamed of, and that meant that he didn’t really need her at all. There must be countless ways for him to connect with the ladies of the ton. He could do it without her help.
Edwina even wondered whether he was regretting the kiss. She knew he found her beautiful, of course. Maybe he had allowed her looks to get the better of him. Maybe he had only kissed her because he found her lovely to look at, and now, he was wishing it had never happened.
He might be relieved that she had asked to stop seeing him.
That was a humiliating thought—and a heartbreaking one.
And it upset her to realize that he was capable of breaking her heart at all. She wouldn’t have liked to believe that he had that power over her. But now, as he turned away from her and madehis way back over to the bench where he had been seated, she knew there was no getting around it.
She hadn’t wanted it to happen—but it had.
He had caused her to feel something.
She didn’t want this thing between the two of them to be at an end.
But it had to. She couldn’t let herself get in any deeper than she was. She couldn’t go on enjoying her time with him because her feelings were starting to grow, and he’d made it clear that he didn’t return those feelings. And the kiss made it that much worse. She ached to kiss him again, and she knew that was something that would never happen—could never be allowed to happen.
Ever since her very first season, she had been toyed with by gentlemen who had attempted to manipulate her, who had seen her beauty as a game they could win. It was the reason Edwina had chosen spinsterhood all these years.
And the Duke had been more than clear that he saw her the same way—as a challenge. A way to test himself. A way to prove himself.
Well, Edwina had something to prove, too. She had to prove that she was more than a prize to be claimed by a charming gentleman. That she was too clever to be ensnared by suchmachinations. It was better to be alone than to be somebody’s fool.
“I’m going to go,” she told him. “I need to find Molly.”
“You shouldn’t go off on your own,” he said, rising again from the bench. “That isn’t safe.”
Being here isn’t safe. It isn’t safe for my heart.
“I’ll be all right,” she said firmly. “I’m just going to find Molly and have her walk home with me.”
“At least let me escort you until you find her. You don’t even know the way out of the maze.”
“Do you?”
“Well, no.”
“Then don’t worry about it. I’m as likely to find my way out on my own as I am with you beside me, and I don’t need your help. I don’t want to spend any more time with you, Your Grace. This is over.”
She thought he might try again to stop her. She half hoped he would.
But he didn’t. He said nothing at all, and after a moment, Edwina turned and walked away.
