I blinked my eyes open. Despite the smells wafting off Kit that I wanted to wrap myself in, a line cut through the creamy skin between his eyebrows.
‘That was a butthead thing to do, right?’ Kit said slowly, almost like he was thinking aloud. ‘I love Hamish, but he should have given me more warning. If not because I’d miss him being around, but because he’s ditching his job at really short notice.’
‘Absolutely.’ I tangled my fingers tighter around Kit’s. ‘He shouldn’t have said goodbye like that.’
A new burst of salt cluttered the air. Kit’s brown eyes darkened as they flooded with tears. ‘I can’t believe he’s leaving.’
I didn’t realise I’d resisted pulling Kit into my arms until the last thread of my self-control broke. I’d run down from the mountains with one true aim; to snuggle with my friend. Coming home to find him sleepily sad had derailed my plan, but I couldn’t witness him crying for a second longer without bringing him closer.
His face crowded into my chest, his hair tickling my neck and chin. I shuffled until his legs entwined with mine, until I could wrap my arms around his back and hold on until he told me to let go.
I pressed my nose into the top of his head and breathed. Vanilla, stronger than ever before. Under that, the saltiness clung. Beneath both of them ran warmth and strength. I couldn’t put my finger on what it reminded me of, but I wanted to smell it always. It was more powerful than Callum’s underlying scent of pack. Kit’s smell was more like home. Like a precious place that provided the utmost comfort and safety.
‘I’m here now,’ I murmured into his hair, my grass stained jumper dampening with his tears. ‘I’m not going anywhere.’
If I ever did, I would give him far more notice than a day. I didn’t know if I’d get a chance to speak to Hamish before he left, wasn’t sure I would choose speaking to him over sticking close to Kit, but if I did, he would get a lesson in normal human etiquette. I might be awkward and most of the things that came out of my mouth weren’t planned, but I knew goodbyes were important. When it was possible to do them well, that was a responsibility that shouldn’t be shirked.
I’d thought my reassurance would lift the clouds of sadness around Kit but his chest juddered with deeper sobs. He mumbled something into my collarbones that I couldn’t make out even with my newly super-charged ears.
I eased back. ‘What was that?’
Kit didn’t look up at me, left me to gaze at the top of his head as he snuffled into my jumper. ‘I just. There’s no obligation for you to stay here. You don’t have to keep living with me.’
‘What?’ I reared away to search his damp face. ‘Do you not want me here?’
The fluttering in my chest, which had calmed since I’d climbed into bed with Kit, reawakened. All I’d wanted as I’d acclimatised to being a wolfman was to come down to the village and be with Kit. I didn’t know what I’d do if he said he’d prefer I stayed away. I’d do it, obviously, but I wasn’t sure I would ever stop wanting to be close to him.
Kit shook his head, his nose grazing my jumper as he closed the space between us. His hands gripped the grass-stained fabric like he was scared I might run off.
‘That’s not what I want.’ Kit pressed his forehead into my neck. ‘I love you living here.’
Relief, as pure as the stream that ran by Callum and Aster’s cabin, coursed through me. I snuggled closer to Kit and smiledinto his hair. ‘I love it too. You’re my favourite person.’ I jolted. ‘Don’t tell Aster I said that.’
I felt more than heard Kit laugh against my chest. ‘I promise.’
I held him close and breathed, all the nervous energy I’d carried with me since I’d woken weeks ago in Callum and Aster’s cabin settling. It was strange to think that Kit had usurped Aster in my affections, but my heart hadn’t slipped a beat when the words tripped out of my mouth. Since I didn’t seem able to make a romantic connection with anyone, I’d assumed Aster would remain my favourite person on the planet until the day I died. It was unexpected but not unwelcome to discover that Kit was now top of the pile of the people I loved.
As we laid together and breathed deep, our chests moving in sync, the salty tang in the air cleared. It slunk around the edges of the indefinable warmth that was pure Kit, rather than swamping it. I nuzzled into Kit’s hair as his scent deepened, surrounding me. He smelt of fresh baked cakes and newly printed books and him. I wished I could bottle it and smell him always. I’d settle, for now, for holding him as close as possible for as long as he would let me.
I rubbed a hand up Kit’s back, my fingers sneaking under the back of his scarf to stroke the warm skin at the nape of his neck. His breathing stuttered, and his scent changed. It was richer. Spicey, maybe.
I froze. I’d smelt something like that before. Each time Callum licked a spoon or bent to stroke Tiny Tim or kissed Aster’s cheek, something similar had blasted from my best friend. That smell oozing off Aster had made me want to scour my skin with a wire brush.
It didn’t feel the same coming from Kit. I wanted to press my nose closer to his scalp, to breath deep against his skin.
Despite Kit’s request to kiss me, it hadn’t occurred to me that I would be able to smell it when he was attracted to me. Ididn’t know what I would have hoped for if I had realised. Maybe that his feelings would go away, would mute back into purely platonic.
But I liked the spiciness filling the air. I wanted more of it. I wanted to find the places where it was strongest, fill my lungs and coat my tongue.
The smell deepened. Callum had told me that many of my own smells would become so familiar that I’d unconsciously ignore them. It had been strange, my first week or so as a werewolf, when I’d felt any emotion and strange scents had bloomed around me. But Callum was right. As the days passed, they’d dimmed.
It was only when I felt something new that I became aware of the shift in my own smell again.
Feeling attraction for someone was certainly new.
My breathing sped up. I wasn’t sure that was what I was going on. I’d not felt that before, so had no frame of reference. I wanted to be around Kit all the time and I wanted to talk to him about everything and preferably be touching him, but I didn’t know if that meant I was romantically interested in him.
I swallowed, the sound loud in the quiet room. ‘Kit?’
