The savagery unleashed on Dewi’s parents.
And on infant Dewi.
Who was to say that very same kind of savagery wouldn’t be unleashed on Bebe, or Dania, or any of those babies, if they weren’t carefully enfolded within the safety of the Targhee Pack’s protection and brought up accordingly to keep them safe?
Even more, from Peyton all the way down, theywantedto proactively protect these children.
Was it ideal?
No. But then again, nothing ever could be.
And if she spent her life living in fear instead of trying to learn how to bravely pivot the way Dewi did, no telling what she might miss out on.
Like a house full of children.
As she’d learned in the wake of her mother’s death, screaming at the sky and stomping her feet about what was fair and unfair wouldn’t change a damned thing about the situation.
The past year had shown her she could finally lean on others. Lean on Beck, trust what he said about the Pack, trust Dewi and everyone.
Not have to remain on guard around them, not having to doubt their motivations.
Not having to worry if there would be a metaphorical knife stuck in her back.
Obviously there was an element of self-preservation in their plans, because protecting the kids included protecting everyone as a whole. Honestly, Beck was more worried about what if the government figured out what was going on while Nami knew it didn’t have to be some nefarious secret alphabet-soup agency.
It could be assholes in a pick-up truck attacking an innocent jogger. It could be a woman on a cell phone harassing a man out birdwatching.
It could be anyone. Countless times, ithadbeen “anyone.”
And her life was now simultaneously more complicated and simplified than she’d ever dreamed possible.
There were also two clear choices—as Ken had eloquently said, she knew she could always opt to err on the side of extreme caution. But then the beauty of much of this new chapter of her life would always be hidden even when it didn’t need to be. Lived in fear, anticipating attacks that might never happen from enemies that didn’t truly exist.
Or she could opt toliveher life. To help all these children learn how to step carefully, but also to walk tall and proudly. To learn how to wield this different kind of privilege to level the playing field once and for all.
To be fearless.
In some ways, to be a little more like Dewi, all while Nami also tried teach Dewi that it was perfectly okay to relax and slow down and appreciate these kinds of moments.
Nami of a year ago hadn’t wanted children, no. Not really. She’d wanted to live her life, and with Da’von close to fledging, she realistically accepted children were not in her future. She’d raised her siblings—theywereher children.
In a perfect world their mother would still be alive, their father wouldn’t be a literal nutless asshole filling a cell in a state prison, and they would have all grown up with the kind of childhood Lu’ana and Reggie were giving to Bebe, and the kind of childhood other kids in that family were enjoying.
She was rinsing off when the baby kicked, making her smile.
I want you to grow up fierce, little girl. Fierce and fearless and having fun.
Nami was ready to leave about the same time Beck was. “You sure you don’t want me to drive you over?” he asked. “I don’t mind taking you.”
“I’m good, baby.” She cupped his face in her hands and stared up into his beautiful blue eyes. “You know how last Sunday I was so upset after we left Reggie’s party?”
He nodded. Bless his heart, he’d been so patient with her about it, too.
“I’d like you to look at that in relation to last night,” she gently said. “You know how you kept telling me there was a plan, and this was the way it had to be, and how the Pack needs to keep kids safe?”
It took him a moment but he finally nodded.
“Now, obviously, I haven’t known Dewi a fraction as long as you have. But I love her. She feels like family. I remember how she put her neck on the line for Malyah that day without question. I remember how she helped us with Da’von. And how desperately worried she was about finding me and Ken when we got lost in the woods. So, I’d like to give you a little something to chew on, wolf man.”
