Finally, the hint of a smile. “And what’s that, baby?”
“How many instances can you count on those handsome paws of yours that Dewi put herself first instead of putting this Pack and everyone else in it before her?”
He started to answer but no sound came out. His gaze unfocused for a moment, and she felt him thinking.
Trying to come up with an argument.
Trying to justify his—to be fair—perfectly logical fear.
His jaw slowly shut and his gaze dropped to her tummy, where he stroked his hands down and around the swell, resting there.
“She never puts herself first,” he softly said. “Ever.”
“Sounds like someone else I know,hmm?”
His gaze finally returned to hers.
“Dawson Beckett, I put forth, again, that youhavekept your oaths. All the…complicatedrelationship stuff between the two of you aside—which I still don’tgetbut I’m not jealous over, anymore—you instilled in Dewi that very thing you swore to Charles Bleacke. Right? You put her before yourself. You modeled it, demonstrated it. Lived it. And nowsheputs everyone else before herself. There was nothing on her mind yesterday except getting that baby back safely. I’m guessing that Charles Bleacke was the kind of guy to put everyone else first?”
Beck nodded. “Yeah,” he hoarsely said. “They both were. They were good people and great parents.”
“Do you think they would want you to spendyourentire life smothering Dewi? Would they want you to deny yourself your happiness, your family?”
He shook his head.
“Do you think Charles would have read her the riot act over yesterday, or would he have congratulated her on a job well done?”
A weary sigh. “He probably would have been damned proud of her.”
“She’s an adult. She’s a mother-to-be with a mate who has, beyond everyone’s expectations including my own, proven himself. Multiple times. You told me you love Ken like a brother, right?”
Beck nodded again. “I do.”
“And everyone has been working really hard with me, showing me a lot of patience—including you—about how I need to let my siblings fly free, correct?”
“Yes.”
“So when I ask you this next question, I want the immediate answer, thefirstword that pops into your mind: With Dewi grown and living her life, who does Dawson Beckett now put first in his?”
“You.” His gaze dropped to her belly again. “And her.”
She pulled him close, holding him, listening to his ragged breathing slow and ease.
“You, baby,” he hoarsely said. “You’re first in my life and will be until my last breath.”
Nami kissed him. “I would have also accepted you putting yourself first and interpreted it to mean me and our baby by default.” She smiled, finally pulling a smile from him. “There’s my handsome wolf man.”
He nuzzled noses with her. “I love you so much it makes my heart ache when I hear Tamsin’s grief and yet I stand there feeling grateful that it’s her and not us. And I feel like a horrible person for thinking that.”
She sighed. “Oh, Dawson. If you think you’re the only adult in this family that thinks that, do I have news for you. It’s a kind of survivor’s guilt. We are allowed to have our happiness. Our happiness doesn’t diminish the validity of her grief. We’re not rubbing Tamsin’s face in it. Do you know how much she said she’s looking forward to me and Dewi having our babies so she can help take care of them?”
He scowled. “Really?”
“Really. She told us one of her dreams, which Maisie shared, was a house full of kids. And Rupert living with them, maybe one day Rupert’s mate, too, if he’d met one, and then their kids. One big family. All she ever wanted was to be a mom.
“You’ve seen her at her worst but her better times are getting longer as she finally can work through it. It’s always gonna hurt her. No one denies that. But she is trying to figure out how to keep living. As much as she misses the Clarkes, she told us she finally feels like she has a family that she thought she’d never have again when she lost Maisie and Rupert. She also told us she never felt like she had a family when growing up. It felt more like she and her momma were under siege from her father. It wouldn’t shock me, the longer she stays here, that she decides not to return to England even once that’s all settled.”
“You think?”
