“I’m sorry. I wasworriedabout you.” He slips his hands into his pockets again. “I worry about both of you when you aren’t with me. When you left…it was all I had left of you.”
The soft-hearted subby boy wants to forgive Leo and immediately fall into his arms for being so sweetly…creepy.
Stalky.
I fight the urge to let him slide and harden my heart, channeling every bit of Elliot’s Sir. “You tracked me after I returned to Florida?”
“Yeah.”
“Elliot said you visited Tallahassee, but you didn’t contact me. Why not?”
“Can we please get back on topic here?”
“Weareon topic, Leo! You stalked me but didn’t talk to me. You dropped contact with me. You fucking ghosted me. When I left…”
I start to choke up and shove my way through it. “If you wanted me to stay here so goddamned much, you could’veorderedme to stay, you know. You could’vefoughtas hard for me as you’ve fought for Elliot all these years. Then you have the nerve to get all pissy with me about stepping in for Elliot whenyoudropped the ball with him?”
“I’mnotbeing pissy!”
“You sure asfuckdid a great imitation of it the other day, playing keep-away with my phone.”
“I’m not upset, and I’m not pissy. I’m…confused.Whydidn’t you call me and tell me about this when it happened? Why didn’t Elliot? Why didn’t he warn me he was officially declaring? Was that you trying to get back at me? Him declaring and not telling me?”
Well, yeah, a little. Of course I don’t admit that,duh. “For starters, because you were on an official trip with President Samuels. Secondly, me coming to work for him happened so quickly that I didn’t have time to consult with you about it first.”
“You were with him for threeweeks, Jor! What the actualfuck, man? You couldn’t findanytime to shoot me a goddamned FYI text or e-mail? I gotta find out by walking into the SitRoom and seeing you standing there like you own the goddamned White House?”
“You couldn’t be bothered to text Elliot back when he texted you? He spent days thinking you were upset with him.”
He runs a hand through his hair. “I fucked up with the cell connection thing, yeah. I admitted it. But that’s because I was distracted. I was distracted because you were fucking missing. I wasseriouslyconsidering leaving the trip and flying to Florida when you went off the radar, becausethat’show fucking worried I was about you. I actually hired a guy to start looking for you. Your former boss told him you left, but they wouldn’t give him details. You didn’t respond to any of my texts or e-mails or voice mails, and then your voice mail filled up! I wasbeggingyou to simply tell me you were alive and all right so I could stop worrying!”
I’ve seen the e-mails, listened to the voice mails.
Yeah, he was worried.
And, yeah, I should have at least e-mailed him.
But I chickened out, I’ll admit it.
Except there’s plenty of room to spin this around on him. Enough damned room to U-turn a fricking semi. I could be a dick and rub salt in his wounds, but no.
I can’t do that to him.
Because still love him.
Because he’sstillmy Sir, even if I uncollared myself and walked away from him for my own good and Elliot’s.
There’s also a part of me that felt satisfied to see shock register on his face when he came face-to-face with me in the SitRoom. Iwillbe owning this White House when Elliot wins, and likehellwill I pretend that I won’t in front of Leo.
“Elliot washurting. I wasn’t going to tell him no.”
Leo starts to say something, pulls himself up short, takes a deep breath, stares at me for a long, uncomfortable moment, then finally speaks in a soft voice I have to struggle to hear.
“Threeweeks, Jordan. Threefuckingweeks, and I walk into the SitRoom, and there you are. Then you leave and won’t eventalkto me?”
I bypass that because I don’t want to relive that particular morning. I’ve had plenty of nightmares over what I saw on that video. “I wasn’t going to turn my back on Elliot. He’s also right that this was the perfect solution. Wasn’t it your plan all along, anyway? For you to marry him and have me be his body man so you could have both of us?”
“Until someone left and wouldn’t give me a real chance to try to fix things, yeah.”
