“Not so much in the act,” Gabe said, “more like they noticed that my hot showers were getting longer. You?”
“Same, except it wasn’t the length of the shower that tipped my mom off,” I told Gabe.
“What was it?”
“Once I discovered the cool thing my dick did and how good it felt, I wanted to do it all the time. I quickly learned the side effects of too much jerking off and it wasn’t blindness.” Gabe threw his head back and laughed heartily, a sound I had become addicted to. “I started using my mother’s expensive moisturizer to prevent chafing and forgot to put it back one day. I found a bottle of lube in the shower the very next day.”
“Your mom sounds kind of cool and understanding,” Gabe said.
It was my turn to laugh. “She is cool and understanding, but she takes things to the extreme. Remind me to tell you about my ‘coming out’ after you meet her.”
“Why can’t you tell me now?” Gabe asked.
“It will mean more to you after you meet her. Just trust me, babe.”
He did and on that fateful Wednesday evening, Gabe got to see exactly what I was referring to when I said my mom took things to the extreme. Now, lesser men might’ve been embarrassed about their mother’s level of excitement for their happiness, but I had come to terms with Bertie’s personality quirks long ago.
“Oh, wow,” Gabe said in awe as he looked around the living room of my parents’ condo. “I’ve never seen anything like it.” I knew he was understating the obvious because the look on his face was priceless as he took in the “Welcome, Gabe” sign in rainbow colors, the helium filled balloons around the room, and the big poster of the two of us on the wall that said Josh loves Gabe beneath it, like that Happy Days spinoff with Joanie and Chachi. I sure hoped that Gabe and I had a happier, longer run than the ill-fated sitcom.
I didn’t ask why she wanted a picture of us as a couple, because I knew what she was going to do; I grew up in her house for fuck’s sake. Gabe wasn’t the only one springing parental surprises that week. I was happy my mom toned down her party outfit though. I worried she’d wear enough rainbows in her outfit to look like a circus clown, or worse, Mimi from The Drew Carey Show. I might not have known the name of the football team from Cleveland, but I knew the famous comedian-turned-actor-turned game show host. My mom was wearing a sunny yellow dress with a rainbow belt. She reminded me of a Care Bear that Meredith used to have.
“Come give mama a hug, Joshy,” she said when she saw me.
I narrowed my eyes at Gabe when he mouthed “Joshy” with a ridiculous grin on his face. I gave my mom a long hug and could feel the happiness she felt for me vibrating through her tiny frame. I had finally brought home someone for her to meet, someone that I loved, and another person for her to love too. As whacky as my mother often was, she never embarrassed me. Everything she did was out of pure love for me, her only child. She was my greatest champion, a fierce warrior who was just over five feet tall, and I adored her.
“I’m so happy for you, Josh,” she whispered. “I’ve hoped and prayed for this day for so long.” She pulled back and looked up into my eyes. “Introduce me to your guy.”
“Mom, this is G…”
“Oh, I know who this is.” My mother elbowed past me and hugged Gabe so tight I worried she was suffocating him. “It’s so good to meet you,” she said, not turning loose of her prey.
“The pleasure is all mine,” Gabe told her, patting her back.
“Bertie, turn loose of the young man. You’ll cut off the circulation to his lower limbs,” my father said when he walked into the room.
My parents were the exact opposite on every spectrum. I’m talking personality, wardrobe, hobbies, and even food. How they managed to compromise and meet in the middle like they did was beyond me. My father once said that my mother made him a better man because she made him appreciate things he never noticed before, like art, music, and even bright colors.“She lights up a room and doesn’t even know it,”he once told me.“Well, she lights me up too. She fills me with a warmth and radiance like my own little ray of sunshine. If you want to be happy in life you either need to be someone’s ray of sunshine or the sky that allows them to shine bright.”I don’t think I fully realized what my father meant until I met Gabe.
Gabe and I were opposite in many ways too and I hoped the example my parents set for me would help me to accommodate Gabe’s needs and personality rather than stifle it. Factoring what I had learned about his need to please from his mother, I knew I’d have to work harder to be his ray of sunshine and not a soul-sucking tornado that would take everything he wanted to give and leave emptiness behind. Later that night, I brought it up when we returned to our beach–as I’d come to think of it.
At first, Gabe laughed at my analogy, but then he stopped when he realized I was serious. “I would never describe you as a soul-sucking tornado, Josh. You’re definitely a ray of sunshine and sometimes I need to wear sunglasses because you burn so bright.”
I stopped and looked at him. “I don’t think I can properly express just how much it means to me that you don’t ever try to change me–not the way I talk, dress, or sashay my happy ass down the street. You’re not only a blue sky, Gabe, you’re one that’s so vivid and striking that there are no clouds marring its perfection. Those days are so rare, but then again, I think you are too.” I think it was a tossup as to who was more surprised by my words.
“I can think of a way you can attempt to express your feelings for me if words have failed you, Sunshine.”
From that moment on, Gabe swapped out his nickname for me and started calling me Sunshine instead of babe. Gabe got a kick out of spending time with my parents too and I don’t think I ever saw him laugh so hard when I told him about my “coming out” party. I told him it made his “welcome party” look tame in comparison. It was both a humiliating and heartwarming experience, one that I’d never forget for the rest of my life.
On our last night in Florida, we had dinner with both sets of parents. We were practically ignored as our folks got to know one another and talked about us like we weren’t in the same room. We just sat there and watched it all unfold as we enjoyed a lovely dinner while Al and my father discussed who should pay for it. Gabe snatched up the bill while those two argued good naturedly, then we quietly snuck away so we could enjoy our last night of vacation before we had to return home.
It was obvious he needed my warmth and radiance even more when we returned to Ohio to temperatures that barely broke the freezing mark after an amazing week in the sun. Neither of us had been eager to return, but we couldn’t stay gone forever. I had a business to run and Gabe needed to look like he wasn’t guilty of whatever crimes IA thought he committed.
We had so much to do that Sunday when we returned home. The first thing we did on our way home from the airport was stop by the grocery store to get emergency staples. I had planned to do the real shopping the following day, but there wasn’t going to be a damn thing in that house to eat, and I was staying home once I got there. I picked up ingredients for a tossed salad and homemade pizza. Gabe added cupcakes from the bakery.
Gabe helped me carry the luggage and groceries upstairs then left to pick up Buddy from Adrian and Sally Ann’s house. I spent a good amount of time fussing over my own feather and fur babies who were happy to see me even though I knew that Meredith and Chaz took good care of them in my absence. I let Jazzy out of her cage to run and play while Diva weaved in and out of my legs.
Savage squawked happily, “Fucknugget! Fucknugget!” I had worried that Savage would revert back to his destructive habits while I was gone, but Meredith assured me that she would keep a close eye on him and even stay over if he looked to be freaking out over being left alone at night. The way he bopped his head and moved from side to side told me that he had done just fine.
As much as I enjoyed our trip, it was good to be home among my familiar things and my babies. I looked forward to spending some quiet time in my salon the following day and getting back into my normal routine, but until then, I had a lot of laundry and things to do. I knew that Gabe would do his part and help, but it didn’t take more than one person to load the washing machine.
