After a long time, Leanna pulls from my grasp. She throws her legs over the side of the bed and sits for a few minutes, then she pushes up and trudges back into the bathroom and starts brushing her hair.
I follow her, looming behind her reflection in the mirror, a deep frown on my face.
“Ana?” I ask.
“What happened to cooling it? You got your endgame? It meant nothing?” Her voice is steel now.
“You were…you needed help.”
“Mmm.”
“What does that mean?”
“Well, thanks for thehelp. He’ll be more horrible now that you showed up like you’re fucking Superman or something.”
My mouth opens, then closes. “I can kill him for you. I’d enjoy it.”
“I’m sure that’s true,” she says. “But I think you’ve managed a nail in his coffin already. My father will have to do something with him now that you outed his bullshit today.”
“I can’t tell if you think that’s good or bad.”
Her lips go flat. “It’s never good to publicly humiliate my dad. He and Lars will talk. They’ll drink. They’ll negotiate and they’ll put all the terms down in writing. And Lars will think he’s in a good place, but my father will find some way to fuck him straight up the ass.”
I don’t have a response to that.
“Listen,” she says. “I know how naive this sounds, but I need you to know that I care about you. I might even?—”
“No. You don’t.”
She turns, looking at me directly now, eyes burning with fury. “You don’t get to tell me how I feel,Nikolai.”
Hearing her use my full name somehow feels like a slap in the face. My jaw clenches.
“I am stupid for it,” she says, “but I love you. And I’ll be okay. I know it can’t work. I know there’s no reality where we can just…be. But I need you to know you’re not exactly subtle about your feelings, either. You’re here, aren’t you?”
I am.
But I shouldn’t be.
So I find a new suit to wear, I comb my hair, and I brush my teeth.
And I leave.
30
NIK
“You’re a terrible wingman,”my sister says, leaning into the bar with her wine glass.
“I’m literally just standing here,” I mutter.
“You’re scowling at every guy who looks my way.”
“They’re all losers. Not good enough for you.”
Her brows shoot up. “Yourcountenanceis horrible tonight. What the fuck’s wrong with you?”
“What’s wrong with you?” I shoot back.
