He could leave again whenever he liked, and she was completely at his mercy.
“And you are certain that you have never wanted to be his?” he asked. “Because, given our circumstances, I understand if you wish to seek an annulment.”
She shook her head firmly.
“I do not like him at all. Even if I could not stand you, I would rather die than be his wife.”
“Then I shall do what I must,” he said firmly. “It will be settled, Anna. Do not worry about it any further.”
She nodded, thanking him quietly. He turned to leave, but she realized in that moment that there was something else that she wished to know.
“I have told you my secret,” she said. “Now, can I know yours?”
He paused, lowering his head for a moment before lifting it again. He did not turn back to look at her, only keeping his line of sight straight ahead.
“It is not my secret to share.”
“Then where were you? Where have you been all of this time?”
“Anna, I cannot tell you. You know that I cannot, for if I could, I would have by now. I need you to trust me.”
“And how can I? How am I supposed to take you at your word when you have given me no reason to?”
“Very well, then. Do not believe a word that I say, if you must. I am responsible for your safety, not for ensuring that you are happy with every decision I make.”
He left with that, and the room felt colder. Despite the way her lips still tingled, she only felt empty.
The housekeeper entered, acting as though she had not heard a thing, but Anna knew that she had. That was why she was there; she wanted to allow her to talk about it.
“I do not know what I was expecting,” she sighed. “I thought that, when he returned, he might have changed his mind and wanted to be a better husband.”
“I was hoping the same. I do not know where he goes, but I hoped that when he came home this time, he might have changed.”
“Become a man,” she nodded. “In any case, I do not know what to do. I shall have to wait for all of this to be solved, and then we can discuss from there. That is, if he does not run the moment the matter is settled.”
“Is that what you think of him?”
Anna considered that for a moment, and she decided that it was. He had made it known to her that he would disappear again and that he was only with her out of obligation. Once his title was secured, he would leave, and if she was surprised or upset by that, then she only had herself to blame.
“It is what everyone thinks of him. I am beginning to think that is how he wishes to be perceived.”
It had been a long night, and she wished to sleep, but it was fitful. Ever since Spencer’s return, she had been unable to rest, for she knew the one person she had never expected to see again was sleeping soundly nearby. He was her husband! How could he be so unaffected by her pain when she had made it so clear to him?
Slipping out of her bed, she made her way down to the kitchens in her nightgown. It was only a thin dress, and the household was cold, so she wanted something warm. She settled on milk, but as she lit the fire to heat it, she heard footsteps approaching.
She bristled, turning to see her husband in the doorway, wearing only his shirt and trousers. His top button was undone, revealing a small amount of his pectoral muscles, just enough for her mind to go elsewhere.
“I could not sleep,” she explained.
“Nor could I,” he replied, taking the matches from her and lighting the fire.
Anna was surprised at the admission, and when he looked at her, he seemed to see it.
“Were you not sleeping?” she asked.
“Wearing this? No, I was in my study. I am trying to make sense of everything, but it has been a while since I had to look at the documents.”
“You need not do so. I have taken care of it all since my arrival.”
