Twin spots of color sit high on his cheeks as his gaze drops, taking in the dark blue silk with the little straps. The lace trim that sits just above my nipples. And his pupils dilate as he sucks in a breath. “Jesus, Emmy. You trying to kill me sooner?”
“That’s not funny,” I breathe.
He shakes his head. “Who’s joking?”
His lips are on mine before I can say anything else. Ben presses me against the doorway, a groan sounding in his throat as I push myself against him. The heat of his bare chest soaks into me, my legs parting.
“Em.” He pulls away, his forehead on mine. His eyes are scrunched closed. “I… I don’t know if I can, baby. I want to – God, do I fucking want to, but…,”
I slip my hand into his. “I know. It doesn’t matter, Ben. I just want you. Whatever that looks like.”
The small lamp beside my bed sends our shadows bouncing across the walls as I slide out from beneath his body and back up to the bed. Holding his gaze, I settle myself down, shifting back. “Touch me?”
Ben follows me down, swallowing as his weight settles on top of me, warm and welcome as I spread my legs out and he settles between them.
“Don’t think,” I murmur against his lips. “Whatever you want.”
He inhales, the air rasping as he brushes his hand over my stiffening nipple. Once. Twice. Feeling it peak beneath his thumb. “You’re so beautiful.”
So is he. His skin is golden in the muted light of my lamp, golden and glorious as he looks down at me with those brown eyes that I could drown in. His hair, a little longer than when we first met, hangs loose over his face, and I push it back to see him better as he drops his mouth to my breast and seals his lips over my nipple, sucking through the silky fabric of my nightgown.
I bow beneath his hands, my spine twisting as he moves down my body. His lips press against the silk, against my stomach, my hip bone… lower.
Heat fills my veins, as his hands find my skin beneath the fabric and rub in gentle circles. I watch as Ben slides his handsup, pushing the silk until it pools over my breasts and beneath my neck.
His inhaled breath makes me feel exactly what he says.
Perfect.
He stays where he is for a long minute, drinking me in before our eyes meet. “I love you.”
My heart clenches. “Then love me.”
I reach for his hand, drawing it up and closing it over my breast.
Ben groans deep in his throat, squeezing and kneading the skin before he lowers himself again. His fingers move lower as our mouths move together, my lips opening on a gasp that he swallows as his finger sinks inside me.
A second finger. A third, until I’m twisting restlessly beneath him, my teeth sinking into my lip to stop me from begging for more. “Ben – I –ah!”
My back arches as he yanks his fingers out, my core clenching around nothing. But he’s wrestling with his sweatpants, yanking them down and kicking them off before he comes back to me, a condom in his hand.
Our eyes meet, both of us sucking in a breath as he pushes inside and my body welcomes him. Ben presses his forehead to mine, his hands curling over my wrists as he presses me down into the cotton bedding and thrusts in a gentle rocking movement.
When I can’t look at him anymore, I bury my face into his neck instead.
“Stay with me.” His voice is muffled as his lips meet my cheek, shaking. “Don’t leave me, Em.”
I know what he means. I swallow back the thick lump in my throat as I focus on him, on the way he moves inside me with so much care that it makes my body tremble.
Still here. Still with me.
Ben moves as if we have a whole lifetime together. Slow, and reverent, his thrusts unhurried even as heat curls in my abdomen, clenching need as I wrap my legs around his waist and he nudges me closer to the peak.
I don’t want it to end. My eyes squeeze closed, my neck tilting back as our breathing becomes harsher.
Ben’s weight becomes heavier, his movements slower. “Em.”
It’s a groan. An apology. I nudge him with my hips, pushing him over onto his back until I can sink down on top of him. Ben’s eyes are lidded and hazy, his hands gripping my hips as I move over him, rocking.
