When it finally stops, Jess presses a damp towel into my hands, feeling my forehead. “What the hell?” she demands. “How long has that been happening?”
With a groan, I wipe my face. “I thought you were going into town?”
The silence is deafening, and she’s chewing her lip when I look up. I give her a flat stare. “Jess.”
She throws her hands up. “They need to make themselves useful. They’re just lingering. And they look like little kicked puppies.”
When I glare at her, she shrugs. “They’re still assholes. At least this way, they’re useful assholes. Anyway, stop deflecting. How long have you been coughing up blood?”
I struggle to my feet, and her hand slips under my elbow. “This is the second time,” I admit.
But this time was so much worse. It feels like I’m drowning, my breath choking in my lungs.
Fear grabs at my throat, threatening to steal the last little piece of air I have left. My balance tilts, and I go down with a thud, Jess crying out as I land heavily on the tiled floor of the bathroom. “Sienna!”
“I’m alright,” I gasp. “I’m fine, Jess.”
Except I’m not fine, and we both know it. I’m about as far from fine as I can be.
Jess lets out a broken sob as she lands next to me. “Sienna.Please.”
She grabs my face, forcing me to look at her. “You’re dying,” she says fiercely. “You’re dying on me, Sienna. And there is nothing I can do to stop it.”
I try to look away, but she won’t let me. “Jess—,”
“You’re leaving me.” Her voice breaks, and my eyes snap to her. She’s shaking. “You’re leaving me, and I don’t have anyone else, Si. It’s me and you, and if you don’t get better, it’s just going to be me. I’ll beall alone.”
“Jess.” I’m crying too, both of us sobbing on the floor of this tiny bathroom. “It’s not—,”
“Please,” she begs. “I know you don’t want them. I get it. But you will die if something doesn’t change, Si. And I can’t watch that.”
“Oh god, Jess.” Her arms wrap around me, and I hold onto her as tightly as I can manage. “I’m sorry,” I gasp. “Jess, I’m so sorry.”
“Stop it,” she snaps. “This isn’t your fault, Si. You’ve been given a shit hand of cards, and now you have to play. But you have an ace out there, even if it’s a shit one. Play your damn ace. Let themhelpyou. When you’re better, we can give them the finger and drive off somewhere where we can drink margaritas and flirt with ridiculously tanned, handsome alphas.”
My throat threatens to close up again, the idea of them coming anywhere near me. “I can’t be with them. I can’t, Jess. It will break me.”
“You’re already broken,” Jess says quietly. “But maybe they can be the glue, too. Just think about it. You don’t have to bewiththem to have them close, Si. You don’t owe them a glass of water if they were on fire, but they owe you fucking everything.”
She dashes her hand across her eyes. “Dammit,” she mutters half-heartedly. “Mascara everywhere.”
“Don’t let Emmett see,” I tease as she gets up and helps me upright. “I think he might have a soft spot for you, Jessalyn Rogers.”
“Hah,” she tosses her hair back. “Obviously. Man’s got excellent taste.”
But the twin spots of color that flare on her cheeks stay where they are as we shuffle slowly back to my room, Jess hovering as I lower myself back into the bed. She perches next to me, pushing my hair back from my face.
“Think about it,” she urges. “Please, Si.”
Letting them back in. Letting them close. Even if it’s nothing more than that, just the idea hurts almost as badly as the pain in my body. But I nod.
“I won’t leave you alone, Jessalyn Rogers,” I squeeze her hand, and she gives me a wobbly smile. “There’s always Monty,” she says with a shrug. “I think he’s got at least another twenty years.”
We both jolt at the knock on the door. Emmett stands awkwardly in the doorframe, his eyes lingering on Jessalyn’s stained cheeks. Moving his eyes back to mine, he offers up a bowl.
“You hungry?” he asks gently. “You haven’t been eating much.”
I’m about to refuse, the idea of food making nausea rise up my throat. But I glance at Jessalyn, at the way her hands tighten against the blankets, her knuckles whitening.
